Jasper Bloodstone & Jan Saur in Eorzea
by gamegirl07
Summary: As you might have expected from the title, this a tale about Jasper and Jan's adventures in Eorzea. They had plans of their own, but now it seems the realm is in need of help from the most unlikely of places.
1. Chapter 1

Jasper Bloodstone & Jan Saur in Eorzea

Jasper found himself dozing once again as he peered through his silver spectacles at the text before him. His initial excitement about learning thaumaturgy was just now dwindling. He was far too old for such things—at least old in the eyes of a Hyur who was perhaps the most populace race on this continent he happened to occupy. His once strikingly dark purple hair was more gray than anything else and his trademark blood red eyes were more black than any other color. It was a trait that was long passed down through his family and it was always known to fade at this stage of life. Not only did he look old, he had even begun to feel that way. It was ridiculous seeing as Elezens were known for their longevity. Maybe he'd spent too much time away from his homeland—Gridania.

Surely by now he would have figured out how to focus his attention on studying, but for some reason, he simply could not do it. His eyes wouldn't stay open for some reason. The words he was reading would stop making sense altogether and his mind would drift to other times. Then it would take him a moment to convince himself that now was reality. The reality being that he was now putting all of his effort into learning a new class of fighting and he was being taught by none other than the Lalafells. He would have laughed if he didn't think it rude to do so. Being taught by children—not something he thought would ever happen to him. But they knew what they were talking about. Was it Cocobusi? Cocobuki? One of those strange names of theirs. Already he could conjure up fire to a small degree. He couldn't do it for very long and he would grow fatigued often. They'd reassured him that it was simply because he was a newcomer not because he was too old.

With a sigh, he placed the old tome down. He'd dozed off for the last time. He needed rest and then perhaps he could focus. Just as he was taking off his spectacles, an older man stepped into the quiet library he occupied. The man looked familiar; very familiar. In fact, when their eyes locked, he thought he could almost recall the man's name.

"Ah, Jasper, there you are," the man said with a grin.

He wore a dark red eye patch and Jasper recalled that he wore it merely for fashion reasons—not that any of his crystal blue eyes were impaired. His short blond hair was pulled back sensibly and he wore clothes that were almost completely made out of leather of some kind.

"Do I know you?" Jasper asked despite himself. After all, he still could not recall his name. It could be that the man just had a familiar face.

"C'mon, Jasper, you mean you don't remember me after all we went through back then?" the man questioned in a tone that suggested surprise and disbelief.

The blond man had stopped at the table and placed his heavy gloved hand on the wooden table. Jasper could make him out clearly now in the glow of the candlelight. There were lines about his eyes and mouth, but the man's name came back to him. He was unmistakable.

"Jan Saur," Jasper said steadily. "It's really you," he said with slow surprise.

"Of course it is. I've been looking for you, friend. You're a hard man to find. You know, you said you were going to settle down in Gridania, but you were nowhere to be found. I was afraid you dropped off the face of the planet."

"Leave it up to you to jump to the extreme conclusions."

"Not so extreme when it's you. You've always been a bit of a loner—you'd be completely content in your own company. Am I right or am I right?"

"Well, you couldn't possibly be wrong apparently. How did you find me? I'm sure it wasn't easy."

"Now that's a bit of a story. I would hate to interrupt your intimate relationship with that book of yours."

Jasper frowned at the other. "You haven't changed, have you? I wouldn't catch you dead with any sort of text in your hands."

Jan grinned. "I'll take that as a compliment. You're far too kind. You know, I almost didn't recognize you, sitting there like somebody's grandpa barely making it through that exhausting book."

"I'll have you know, I'm quite young by Elezen standards."

"Not by mine and not from what I can see."

Jasper leaned back in his chair. "You're probably right," he said with a sigh. "For a Hyur, you seem to have aged gracefully."

"Thank you. But then, I don't spend my days in dusty old libraries. Let's go out for a bit. You look like you need it."

"Why not? I'm not getting anything done in here anyways."

Jasper finally stood, picking up the book and putting it back where he had taken it. He had always been taller than Jan, but then he towered over most people—he enjoyed the added intimidating factor. The Lalafells appeared like ants compared to his stature. Jan wasn't concerned about such things—he was used to it. The two of them made it out into the afternoon heat and headed for the adventurer's guild.

At that time of day, the younger ones probably wouldn't be there. They were, of course, off adventuring. All of which was fine with them. They started out ordering drinks together, but they eventually drifted to different parts of the establishment. Jasper always envied Jan's ability to converse with practically anyone. The affair was probably made even easier with people who spoke with freer tongues thanks to the booze. He already had a bit of a crowd around him. Sometimes they'd burst out laughing, but their voices quickly transformed an almost laid back atmosphere to a more excited one. The noise level practically increased twofold in the place and it was probably thanks to Jan. Not that Jasper was perturbed about such things. He'd taken the strongest drink they had there and sipped on it slowly in the quietest spot he could find. He was for all intents and purposes, enjoying himself. The sound of people talking joyously—and not even a hint of a fight breaking out—laughter and the like. It was a far cry from the solitude of a drab library as Jan would call it.

A woman who he could tell was quite plastered stumbled over to him. Usually, he'd avoid such interaction like the plague, but Jasper didn't feel like leaving his spot. Besides, at first glance, the woman was easy on the eyes. Her most noticeable trait being her large breasts. She was dark skinned, her complexion just a little lighter than his and when she looked up at him, he noticed her strikingly golden eyes. She smiled at him playfully. Actually, she was the same height as he, but when she fell into him, she'd seemed otherwise. The sharp smell of alcohol was on her breath. Closer examination and he knew her to be Roegadyn.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here? It's no fun drinking all alone, is it?"

"I'm enjoying myself, FYI."

She laughed. "Of course! Leave it up to a loner Elezen to be enjoying himself posted up against a wall."

"Of course, indeed."

She was practically using him to support herself. Her breasts were quite pushed into him by then. He made no motions to remove her presence.

"What's that you have there?" she asked indicating the glass he still managed to keep in his hand.

"Oh, no, you've clearly had enough."

She laughed again. "Probably something light anyway."

"I beg to differ."

"Then let me try some."

"Alright," he said giving in. Although, he didn't think it was exactly customary for a woman to be asking for his drink rather they'd ask for a new one altogether.

He put the cup to her lips and allowed her sip. He could tell immediately that she approved.

"Now that's the good stuff," she declared. "Guess I was wrong about you. Look at you, getting all tipsy over here. You hold your liquor well."

"I'd say the same for you, but…"

She went into a laughing fit. It was a full minute before she could calm herself somewhat. "I'm new to this, ya know. But Roegadyns are supposed to be able to handle a few drinks at least—geez!"

"Well, I'd say you're training yourself quite well in that regard. Keep getting plastered every night and you'll build a good tolerance."

"Oh, you're such a bad man! Telling me to keep getting drunk as Hell!"

Dispensing with the pretenses, Jasper decided he'd empty the rest of the contents in his glass—he was tired of holding it. He'd only gotten a slight buzz, but that was enough—he disliked not being in control of his own faculties. Seeing as the woman wouldn't leave and she appeared quite gorgeous in his eyes, there was really only one way to respond. He lifted her face towards his and kissed her outright none of which received any protests from her. She was quite slumped against him at this point and she wore a tank top. He could easily slip his hand under such a garment to feel her plentiful breast—something he thought he'd never find himself doing in such a public place. They were quite soft. Good enough to eat as he began to kiss her with a greedy passion. It did seem as if he would get lucky tonight. He wasn't normally a breast man. In fact, he often avoided such woman as he saw them as lewd, but his tastes had changed without him ever knowing until that night. She giggled playfully between mouthfuls. What in the world was he getting himself into? This certainly wasn't something he did on a normal basis if ever, but he was intent on her. Perhaps it was her rusty red hair, perhaps it was her soft lips, perhaps it was his sudden need of companionship—he didn't know. He just knew that now felt right—it felt like the most natural thing in the world to do.

He hadn't noticed that Jan had approached, he was far too engrossed and his hands far too occupied with supple breasts.

"Geez, man, what are you doing? Get a room already."

Jasper only half heard his voice. He paused in his kissing all the same and turned his head to him. "Apologies. This young woman and I were just leaving."

"Just leaving? You don't even know her name. This isn't like you at all."

Jasper already knew such things—he didn't want to hear it from someone else. He also didn't want to hear anymore the other had to say so he continued with the woman for a bit longer just to annoy him.

"Are you actually drunk?" Jasper heard Jan say.

Jasper turned from the other then and took one of the stumbling woman's hands.

"I'm fine," Jasper said as an afterthought. "See you in the morning."

With that, Jasper left the other to his own devices. They didn't have far to go, but it was task to even get her up the stairs, but once in bed, she seemed ready for anything. He was quite hard by then, but he eased her into it. She did say she was "new to this" even though she'd been referring to drinking, he suspected sex fell in the same category. So he began to work her down slowly so that she might become more aroused. She was quite firm and muscular as was expected and she was energetic, always giggling when he kissed her softly down her body. And he loved her breasts, he always loved her breasts. He would return to them often to suck on them—she found that to be quite pleasant. Eventually, he dispensed of the foreplay and slid his cock smoothly into her and she began to moan—it meant that he was doing _something_ right. He began slow and gradually increased his speed. He could tell from her reaction that she would enjoy things fast and hard—and that was exactly what he gave her. That night, they experimented with different positions—she seemed surprisingly lucid enough for such things—and for some reason she couldn't stop commenting on how pleasantly large his cock was as if she expected all Elezens to have significantly smaller ones. He wore her out all night with energy he hadn't known he had. Why just earlier he couldn't even stay awake for a simple book, but perhaps this was far more exciting than a book. At the very least, it required a lot more activity. Jasper didn't know just when they fell asleep, but at some point it must have happened because when he awoke, it was the next morning.

The first thing he noticed was that his hair was in his face. He always without fail had it pulled back into a ponytail; however his band had mysteriously disappeared. He vaguely remembered her pulling it off claiming that it seemed far too constricting. He pushed it back once with his hand, but it fell right back in his face—it was a losing battle and he simply let the matter rest. Of course, he was also naked. He turned to look over at the woman's nakedness and he found that he was still quite lustful as if last night just hadn't been enough. He gently pushed the stray pieces of hair from her face and almost instantly she began to rouse. Her eyebrows crinkled as her golden eyes peered out into the world. Now that that there was better light, he could see her better. He noticed her rippling abs, far more defined than his had ever been. She was already grinning at him.

"You still here?" she asked.

Jasper thought the question to be rhetorical so he did not answer. Instead, he climbed atop her.

"Oh, fine," she said with a sigh, "If you're really so eager, but only because you're so handsome."

Such compliments did much to boost his confidence—it wasn't often that they came his way. There was no foreplay this time and she seemed completely fine with this. He went at a moderate speed. She seemed sober now and able to make more sense out of the situation.

"I never got your name," Jasper finally said.

She waited for a moment enjoying his movement atop her. "I never got yours," she replied.

"Jasper Bloodstone," he said simply.

Her eyes lit up a bit with recognition. "You're a Bloodstone. The Elezens with the blood red eyes." He felt her eyes studying him closer, "But I guess you're an exception."

It wasn't entirely odd that she would know such a thing. His family was a bit well known almost synonymous with old money. Many years ago, perhaps even centuries, they had stumbled upon a mine rich in jasper. Though it was a rock that could be virtually any color, the deep red ones were the kind his family had laid claim to. That their eyes shared the same color was by coincidence, but it was legend that their ancestors mined said jasper with such intensity and passion that it stained their eyes and that the earth stained their skin. Over the years, the jasper they mined gained a common name known as "blood stone". It seemed their family name had always been such, but, of course, Jasper knew otherwise. It had been changed so long ago, that their old one was all but forgotten by the general public. Times were different. The land that they lived on had changed as well as the people who dwelt there. They were widely known as the Bloodstones and they had had no reason to change it. The name "Jasper" was a reoccurring name in the family. It was tradition to be named after a precious stone or some variation of Jasper. But that did not stop him from being quite fond of his name. Whenever he had the chance to say it in full, it did fill him with a sense of pride, doubly so if the person he said it to recognized it.

"It fades with age," he replied. No doubt, his name made more sense when he was younger.

"You must have been quite the lady-killer back then, old man, weren't you?"

"I wouldn't say that."

"But don't feel so self-conscious about it. You still have a youthful face." She reached up and touched his face.

"As do you." He got a pleasant smile in response.

"Well, of course I do, silly—I'm young enough to be your daughter. I bet if you dyed your hair, no one could tell just how old you really are."

"I see no sense in hiding things."

"Really?" she asked in unconvincing tone.

"Well," he began giving her suggestion another thought, "do you think that'd work? If I supposedly wanted to look younger."

She nodded. "Seems like you would have already done that…am I the type of woman you always go for? Young, vulnerable."

"I don't have a type."

"Yes you do. Everyone does even if you don't know it. It's even possible to have more than one. If you're always going for younger, then I'd dye my hair. But if you're going for someone younger who doesn't mind someone older, well then, I wouldn't bother."

"Looks like you have this all worked out."

"It's not rocket science."

"And will you be revealing your name?"

"Alright, I guess it's only fair. Crimson Dawn."

"Is that really it or are you pulling my leg?"

"Does it sound strange to you?"

"Your first name happens to be an adjective and your last name a noun—what are the chances? It rather rolls off the tongue, doesn't it?"

"Well your name is just two nouns and I believed you straight away even without the red eyes."

"Touché. I wonder, does anyone ever call you a nickname like 'Crim'?

"Cute. Does anyone call you Jazzy? I didn't think so. It's customary for people to say my full name because, as you say, it does roll off tongue. I suppose that's what my mother had in mind when she named me."

"Do you mind if I just called you Crimson? I'm rather fond of that color."

"I bet you are. As long as you don't try to abbreviate it, I'm fine with that."

Jasper took this time to pull out of her. He'd finally had his fill and she did seem to be a bit restless.

"If you don't mind, I have someplace to be in the morning," Crimson said as she sat up to look about for her discarded clothes.

"You have to leave so soon?" Jasper questioned. He too sought out his clothes.

"Unlike some people, I am busy."

She was putting on her clothes quickly.

"Sorry, if I made you late then," Jasper said watching her dress.

"No, you have no fault in it. I chose what I wanted to do last night and if I am late, I feel it was for a good cause."

"You wouldn't leave without giving me your Linkshell code, would you?"

She stopped in whatever she was doing and turned to him with a look that suggested that his question had sounded quite ridiculous. "We had a one-night stand. You do know what that is, right? Our paths crossed for a moment and we separate. That's no cause for handing out contact information."

"We went through all the trouble of revealing our names—

She sighed exasperatedly, "I forget Elezens are quite emotional creatures. Always making situations far deeper than they should."

"So as I hear it, you don't want to meet again at some later date?"

"Well, if we happen to meet again, I suppose I wouldn't be unhappy. Now I have to go. I did enjoy your company, Jasper, you're quite a pleasant individual both in temperament and sex."

"I'll see you whenever then."

Jasper sat on the bed still naked and he didn't miss the fact that she did pause to look at him a moment longer than usual before leaving. After he was left alone he put on his clothes and walked to the door only to put his back to it and slide down the length of it as he sat back down on the wooden floor. He was a wreck. He hadn't known it, but he had expected more. The more he thought about it, the more depressed he became. Only a fool would have become so arbitrarily emotionally involved with a woman he hardly knew. Yet Jasper felt that he knew her and had lost her all in the span of a few hours.

His linkshell began to vibrate and interrupted his dreary solitude. He picked himself off the ground, went over to his bed and lifted it to his ear.

"Yes?" he asked in as pleasant a tone as he could muster.

"Jan. How is my wayward friend doing this morning?"

"She left," Jasper said simply. "She just left."

"Yes. People do that."

"But, it was so abrupt."

"Now, Jasper…Roegadyns are pretty no-nonsense—

"I know. I just thought…she might have stayed a bit longer."

"You did it again, didn't you?"

"Did what?"

"For as long as I've known you, you always tend to get too—what's the word?—'involved' with women far too quickly. You expect too much and you get disappointed over and over and over again."

"That doesn't…sound like me at all."

"Doesn't it? Take it from someone who's looking from the outside in."

"I guess I'll just have to take your word for it, huh?"

"You sound depressed. I bet you didn't manage to get any breakfast yet."

"No."

"Meet me at the guild in five."

"Make that ten."

"Alright. See you then. And try not to jump off any tall building before then."

Jasper shook his head in annoyance as Jan quickly turned off his end. He finally stood up. He took his time cleaning himself and met Jan in fifteen minutes instead of ten, but this didn't bother him all that much. He wasn't exactly known for being punctual. Jan was there already contently sipping on a glass of orange juice.

"I'm curious, Jan," Jasper said as he sat down across from the other. "How did your night go?"

Jan shrugged. "Nothing special," he said drably. "Got a room somewhere nearby. Went to bed."

"You think I should dye my hair?" Jasper asked with little pretense, but he was less careful about how he sounded in front of Jan—he was expected to be socially inept and not at all savvy with carrying conversations. At the moment, his hair was back in its usual ponytail.

Jan gave him a thoughtful look. "Why? Do you want to?"

"That's not an answer—it's a question. And it doesn't help me."

"Geez, sorry, man. I don't want to be making life changing decisions about you. If you want to, do it…but, it'd be pretty out of character. I mean, are you really that concerned with your looks? _Wait_ a minute," he said in a suspicious tone. "It's something that woman said to you, isn't it?"

"Am I that transparent? And she's not 'that woman'. Her name's Crimson Dawn."

"Whatever. The fact remains. You can't let some girl get to you that easily. I say, if she doesn't like you the way you are, then be about your way."

"You know, that contradicts quite a few anecdotes you've told me over the years, but I'll let that slide. I see what you mean."

"Well, now that we've gotten _that_ out the way." Jan took a nice long swig of his orange juice. Jasper remembered that his friend rather fancied the drink especially when it was icy cold.

"You seemed surprised that I wasn't back in my homeland, 'settled down' as you say, but I could say the same for you—well, minus homeland. I mean, between the two of us, I thought for sure you would have been somewhere fathering kids with a loving wife."

Jan gave the other a strained look. "Does that really sound like me?"

"It's not in the realm of impossibility, but…I guess I read you wrong all those years ago. We said our farewells and I didn't expect to see you again and if I did, you'd certainly be different."

"You're not wrong," Jan said sitting back. "In reality, yes, I did want to settle down, but it's easier said than done. It's like when you're actively searching for someone, the ocean suddenly becomes empty. Women are such fickle people. They always fantasize about someone dashing, brave, handsome…no one like me."

"I've never known you to be self-degrading."

"I'm _not_. It just seems that way. I know what I want and if I see it, I will pursue her. But women, they haven't the slightest clue what they want and they lead you on and on to a dead end every time."

"Sounds like this is coming from experience."

"Yes, it is."

"Tell me about it."

"Really?" Jan said with a raised eyebrow. "It's not very exciting."

"Oh, but you always manage to make even the most boring subjects sound exciting. In fact, I bet if it were you teaching me thaumaturgy, I would be far more motivated."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence. Since you're so interested, I'll bore you with a short and depressing love story—one of many."

Before he began, Jasper finally ordered some food from the waiter and then indicated to Jan that he had his full attention.

"Well, I was walking home from work."

"Wait, you work?"

"Yes, we can't all have rich families. Besides, I wasn't doing nearly as much adventuring as I had in the past—money was getting tight."

"But where did you work—what did you do?"

"Nothing worth mentioning," Jan said with a slight blush.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, really. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to get back to this story you so eagerly wanted to hear."

Jasper put his hands up in truce.

"Anyways, I was walking home from work and I scoped this woman waiting for the Chocobo Express—well, her and two other people. They were pretty insignificant; forget if they were men or women. She had long brunette hair and a very innocent looking white dress. She didn't look at anyone—she was always looking down. Exactly my type: shy, beautiful. I couldn't let the chance pass by—I pretended as if I needed to wait there as well. Immediately started talking to her."

"What did you say?" Jasper asked. Wondering how in the world one could successfully speak to strangers without sounding awkward.

Jan shrugged. "Whatever was on my mind at the moment which must not have been important seeing as I can't recall. Luckily, the express was running late. Gave me more of a chance to introduce myself which, by the way, I did not start out doing. I couldn't tell if I was annoying her half the death or if she was genuinely interested in what I had to say. She just wouldn't _talk_. I judged from her reactions. It's always a good sign if she smiles and she would push her hair back every now and then when it fell into her face—something she hadn't been doing before. Eventually, I found her name to be Hannah Seawig."

"A Hyur?"

"A Hyur," Jan confirmed. "Although, here's where I started to second guess myself. When I asked for her contact information, she hesitated. You always want to reassure the woman that you don't plan on doing anything stupid with that kind information, just that you wanted to meet again, maybe for a drink. I did all of this and she still hesitated, but eventually she did give that to me. It was like pulling teeth from a baby. She'd managed to make me feel like I was _coercing_ her into doing it. I didn't call her that night or the next for good measure. But on the third day, I took a chance. Asked if she was busy and if she was up for doing something together. She was very indecisive so I simply chose the most convenient location seeing as she was 'good for anything'. That night, I got her to speak about herself, but she still seemed closemouthed. I mean, most shy people open up if they know you somewhat and if you give them attention. She did not. I mean, girls want to talk about themselves on dates and I was completely prepared for that. Even had questions I would ask her in my head. But none of it started the kind of conversation I wanted. She shut me down at every chance. And, of course, I did what I do best—talk about myself; commandeer the entire night. Not that I didn't give her chances, but I'm sure that must have been annoying. Soon after finishing her meal, she left abruptly—rudely even. And I was certain it must have been something I said….because I do say a lot of things. I followed her. I mean, it's a completely natural thing to do if you feel your guest has left far too soon. You'd want a reason at least. I try to be patient especially if the girl's angry and she seemed that way. Just in a completely different _mood_. And I asked what was wrong and I apologized in advanced for anything that rubbed her the wrong way. And she told me—I remember this clear as day—'I'm just not into you.' Spun on her heel and stalked off. But I still pursued her—that was a horrible, nondescriptive answer. Wasn't there something more? When I caught back up to her, she said: 'You're too controlling and you talk too much. Would you mind losing my contact information?'. I told her, I never call a person who I know doesn't want talk to me. And she left after that. I've never called her again and I've deleted her information."

"She really said those things? Is that even customary? Doesn't seem like she knew you well enough to already be making those kinds of assumptions about you."

"It happens. Especially if you constantly find yourself dealing with the same kind of person. Maybe she saw something in my mannerisms, maybe I _am_ too controlling. I did set everything up from the very beginning. Forced her to give me her contact information, dragged her out on a date, decided how I wanted the conversation to go. That all sounds pretty controlling to me in hindsight. And the 'talk too much bit', well I already knew that."

"But isn't that why you always go for her type, so that you'd have an excuse to be that way. I'm sure an indecisive woman would benefit from someone like you."

"Well, I wasn't thinking along those lines. I just want someone who would put up my mouth and if the girl doesn't talk much well then she wouldn't mind if I did."

"I see, but what if she just doesn't like to talk and she doesn't like to be around those who do?"

"I won't know that until I get to know her. It's just one failed attempt after another."

"Have you ever considered going for someone different?" Jasper suggested.

"No. I mean, I have it all figured out."

"Do you? Seems like if you go for same type of girl, you'll yield the same results. You have to do something different in order to get something different."

"You know," Jan said thoughtfully, "That actually makes sense. I knew there was a reason I hung around you."

"So, no more super shy girls. They're too indecisive and it often just encourages you to take far too much control. Why don't you try for someone who is the complete opposite?"

"Complete opposite?" Jan asked wearily. "Sounds like a headache waiting to happen."

"Oh, but I know you well enough. You're not really controlling, you just always need to have an immediate answer for something, a particular system set in place to take care of certain situations, you always have to know what to do next before you actually do it. But if someone says, 'if you do this, it will make me very happy.', you'll do it, no questions asked. If someone suggests you do something different, you'll try it even if you don't initially agree with it. That's why I know that since I've suggested you go for a different type, you'll do just that. Certainly, a woman who knows what she wants would take the reins out of your hands for a change—and you might even find that you like it that way."

"Who would have thought that I would be getting dating advice from someone who's hardly dated anyone? But…it does make sense."

"See? You can't tell me you've always dated the same kind of girl. I mean, surely you must have at least come in contact with others."

"Well, there was that stripper…"

A beginning of a smile formed on Jasper's face. He put his hands together lightly. "Of course! A stripper. Why the very definition of decisiveness. Well, tell me about this stripper."

"You want to hear about a stripper?" Jan asked giving the other an unconvinced look.

"Well, if she was worth mentioning, she's worth talking about."

"Alright," Jan said with a sigh. "She was…very flexible. I know what you're thinking—well, aren't they all?—but she was different. You could tell that she was the main attraction. I was much younger then, younger than when I first met you and I used to have some wild friends—they'd finally succeeded in dragging me out to this strip club. When I was there, I was practically mesmerized by everything. I was so surprised that women could be so…loose and unclothed. She focused her attention on me, you see. I was a newcomer and she could probably tell that immediately. It couldn't have been that I was tipping her well—I didn't have much money—but she stayed in my vicinity almost the whole night. And, yes, there was a lap dance involved or shall I say several of them. She was called 'Delicious' on stage, but she eventually told me her real one was Dinah."

"Just Dinah?" Jasper interrupted in curiosity.

"Just Dinah. And she told me to wait for her after the show. So I stayed there until the place closed. Even my friends had left already. I waited for her. I didn't expect anything special. I knew she must have been tired out after such a busy night. It was pretty chill. I'd managed not to get myself stupid drunk and I took her to this really low key place to eat. Good conversation. And finally I took her home."

"I'm not seeing how this didn't work out."

"I was getting to that. First of all, we hadn't exchanged contact information. We hadn't wanted to. As much as she liked my company she was still guarded. And I, at the time, didn't want to get involved with anyone—not like that anyway. I don't know—I sensed that she was looking for something deep, a real relationship and I wasn't. So I avoided the place where she worked like the plague. It was so long ago, I'm sure she's forgotten me. And there's no way she could still be doing the same thing at the same place."

"Seems like the time just wasn't right."

"Story of my life."

"But how do you know she's not working at the same place?"

"Jasper, it's been twenty years, surely she'd have found something better to do with her life."

"And if she hasn't?"

"Well, that would be horrible. She'd have to be my age probably not making nearly as much as she had in the past."

"You sound concerned," Jasper said with a grin.

"I see what you're doing. Nothing's going to convince me to go back to some old strip club just to go see if she's still there."

"Why not?" Jasper asked with a shrug. "Strip clubs are for old geezers such as ourselves anyways. I doubt we'd look out of place. And I have absolutely nothing to look forward to this evening and you don't either. Worst case scenario, we get there and she's not there—it wouldn't be a complete bust. And if she happens to be there, well, that wouldn't be so bad either."

"I hope she isn't. In fact, I know she isn't. The only reason you're suggesting any of this is because you just want to see some naked women—admit it."  
"Maybe I do. But the only reason you're even considering my suggestion is because you want to see some naked women as well."

Jan grinned at him. "What the hell, let's just do it—I have nothing better to do this evening."

/

Neither one of them expected to actually find Dinah. She was more of an excuse—some way to justify their need to be in a place such as that. Jan had never believed he would be one of those wistful old men throwing money at a woman just so she would pleasure him more vigorously. Yet here he was. Strangely, Jasper was not at all shameful. He seemed not to care at all. Perhaps he'd already given up on the prospects of finding a suitable mate. He'd lived this long and it hadn't happen, why should it happen later?

The night was still young when they finally separated themselves from the enticing environment. Jasper had given the other a knowing look and they pulled off to the bar to discuss their course of action.

"Well, I don't see her," Jan said immediately after they sat down.

"You think she'd still be the main attraction after all these years? If she's still working here, she may still be in the back."

"It's not like we can get back there anyway."

"Or can we? Have you seen that lackadaisical bodyguard they have guarding the back? You could dispatch him in your sleep, am I right? Or are you that out of practice?"

"You know, Jasper, you're turning into some really bad influence. You want me to start a scene over there? For what? So I can see if someone may or may not be there?"

"You don't have to start a scene, Jan. People aren't alert here. They're attentions are quite averted, if you know what I mean. Take him out quietly and then we can slip into the back. Easy."

"You're not going to let this go, are you?"

"I'm on an adrenaline rush, bear with me. If you can't do it, I certainly can."

"Fine."

Jan stood up then and strolled off and Jasper followed casually behind. The guard certainly was lackadaisical and with a quick hard fist to the guts, the man slumped in unconsciousness. Before he could fall to the ground, Jan deftly moved him to a nearby couch and sat him down. For all intents and purposes, he seemed asleep. No one noticed a thing. No ruckus or anything. Jan looked back at Jasper for reassurance, but the other was already gesturing for him to go forth. He did so obediently; tried out the doorknob and it opened the door quite easily. He stepped in and the noise volume decreased twofold. Jasper closed the door behind him. All that could be heard was the women busily trying to get on their outfits and put on makeup. They hadn't noticed, at first, that they had come. Jan began to look from woman to woman. It was crowded and tight back there so it wasn't exactly easy to then begin walking down the aisle. As they did so, more and more women began to notice them. "Oh, hellooo, cutie", "Wait, for my performance, baby", "C'mere, daddy". That and various indescribable sounds could be heard from them. Sometimes, Jasper responded with a grin of his own, sometimes not at all. It wasn't as if he knew what Dinah looked like. In fact, at the moment, he was probably in excess of. But it did seem that Jan needed constant reassurances as he looked back to his friend more often than not. It felt like an hour had passed before they got to a bigger opening in the room at the pace they were going. At this point, Jasper put a hand on Jan's shoulder to get his attention. Jan looked at the other with a questioning look.

"Let's just ask one of them," Jasper said low enough for only Jan to hear.

Jan nodded to the other. With that, Jasper turned to a nearby blond Mi'quote putting on eye shadow.

"You wouldn't happen to know a stripper by the name of 'Delicious', would you?"

"Oh, are you one of her men?"

"Yes." Jasper didn't even skip a beat.

"Sorry, but she doesn't work here anymore—she doesn't need to from what I heard."

"Do you know where I can find her?"

"She didn't tell you?" She sighed exasperatedly, "That girl can be so airheaded sometimes. Geez, at least tell your clientele where they can meet you. I tell you her address and you tell her she owes me."

"Alright."

The blonde leaned over and whispered in his ear and Jasper remembered the address instantly. Jasper turned to Jan and gestured that he follow him out of there. They went out the back of the club and finally there was peace and quiet. Jan hadn't realized just how loud it was until silence was juxtaposition.

"What you find out?" Jan asked.

"Where she works probably. Seems like your girl has a steady clientele of men who want to see her specifically—no need for her to work here."

"That doesn't sound good at all."

"Well, in her world, I bet she's a celebrity. Everyone seems to know her. Tell me, Jan, do you really want to see her again?"

"You're asking me this now?"

Jasper shook his head slowly, "I mean, it's one thing if she was actually still working here—another if she's gotten herself caught up in this kind of lifestyle. She may like where she is. She may not want to leave. And I don't want to see you get disappointed."

"We've come this far," Jan finally said after a moment of silence. "And…I've been wondering how she's been doing now that it seems like we might be able to see her again. Win or lose—that's all I want."

"Well then, I'd hate to keep you in suspense."

/

They came upon a manor almost in the middle of nowhere. In fact they had to ride their chocobos for almost an hour to get there. They tied up their mounts on the white picket fence and made their way up to the entrance.

"By the way, this Dinah. Is she a Mi'quote?"

"She is. Dark purple hair, dark eyes, dark skin. Very voluptuous."

"I'm sure her clientele would agree."

"I know who she is, Jasper," he said with a slight edge to his tone. He knocked on the door soon after.

They waited for only a moment before a butler opened the door.

"Ah, and who are you two?" the balding man asked to the duo.

"I'm Jan. This is my friend Jasper."

"I see, newcomers. How did you hear about her, if you don't mind me asking?"

"I knew her a long time ago," Jan said steadily.

"Ah," the man said simply. "Follow me."

Jan and Jasper looked at each other quickly but then followed the man.

"The night is still young, you know. The real show hasn't even started yet," the butler said.

He led them up the main stairs and they stood at large and grandiose doors. The butler pushed both of them open and the two was presented with a dark room with sparse light splashed against the walls and floors.

"Take a seat, no need to be shy, fellas."

The duo looked up a little startled at the woman's voice. Their eyes hadn't adjusted to the darkness yet, but obviously there was a stage somewhere and a woman on a microphone. When they glanced behind themselves, they found the butler was gone and the door had been closed behind them.

"Ummmmm, delicious, just the right age. Come, sit close."

Jan began to walk forward; he'd almost forgotten Jasper was even there. That voice—it was her. It was Dinah. It sounded just as he remembered it to be; rich and full of life. His eyes were beginning to see better. He wanted to see her so he did walk closer, as close as he could get. The stage appeared and then her. His hands were on the stage and he gazed at her with a mesmerized look. She looked different. Before, her hair had been short, now it was much longer now falling in lovely waves around her. She hadn't even begun to undress herself, but Jan could tell that she was just as slim and muscular as before. Her soft smooth skin glistened a bit in the scarce light. She smiled at him and he nearly melted. Suddenly a light came on over the stage and then anyone could see her in all her glory. Jan hadn't the slightest clue who else might have been there—he just knew that he was there and he had her attention. She began her dance, curling about the pole expertly. She made eye contact with the other men, but Jan thought her eyes stayed on his the longest. He must have been the only one who had moved so close. He could hear the men whistling, encouraging her to expose more of her body. Money, flowers, even condoms were thrown on the stage and she seemed to be enjoying herself. Jan was glad that she seemed at ease with the whole thing, but at the same time, it saddened him. Her skills had not dwindled over the years—they'd only become better, sharper, and more precise. She hadn't lost her vigor; not from what he could see. She purred affectionately at the larger tips and made it a point to move over closer to them.

Jan realized suddenly that he hadn't thrown out any money and when he went to his wallet to grab some, he realized he did not want to. She meant something more to him than being an exceptionally good dancer. He already saw her in a different light and he could not bring himself to tipping her. Surely she must have recognized him, but she'd given him no real evidence that she did. No one came to pull him away from his close vicinity. If there were security guards about perhaps they'd decided not to deal with him. Jan simply watched her. He watched as she enticed one of the men to give out more and more money and he saw her whisper something in the man's ear. Whatever she said got the man even more excited. Jan didn't like the look in the man's eyes—they stared at her greedily. But then again, perhaps he shared that same look only the other man paid money, he did not.

Jan wasn't sure how long he stood there, but his trance was only broken when the lights shut off and the room they were in suddenly became lit up with low key lighting. Jan blinked once and looked around. Where had Jasper gotten off to? He was nowhere in sight. Jan walked further back into the room and finally found his friend standing, almost hiding behind a piece of the wall that was meant to be a column fused with the wall.

"Jasper, what's wrong?" Jan asked the other immediately when he was in earshot.

"Sorry, I couldn't watch anymore."

Jan knew that tone of voice anywhere—he was most certainly blushing.

"Dinah. I can see why you still remember her even after all these years. I thought it was improper of me to be watching your woman undress—it seemed private."

"But she's not _my_ woman," Jan said exasperatedly. "Besides, she may not even remember me. It must have just been my imagination that she recognized me. You should have seen that guy she was all over—the guy must have given her a couple hundred." He shook his head slowly.

"If I had my way, I'd have done away with the lot of them. They're just distractions and she's just doing her job. Think, Jan, she wouldn't compromise her money flow for someone she only knew for a spell decades ago. I say you pursue her—just as you did that Hannah girl—and see how she responds."

"What do you mean pursue her? It's obvious what or more like who she's going to do tonight. You want me to get in between that? She's just doing her job."

"Follow them."

"That's borderline stalker."

Jasper gave him a perturbed look. "Well no one said she has to know that you are. Just watch her. Make sure she's safe. I don't like how that man was looking at her."

"Look, Jasper, she a beautiful woman who knows how to work the pole, of course that guy was going to be looking at her like that."

"It was more than that."

"You were all the way over here. How could you tell?"

"I have good eyes at least when things are at a distance. There was more than lust in his eyes. There was something dangerous there. If I'm right, you may yet have your chance with your bonny lass."

"You really think so?"

"I wouldn't lie to you. When have I ever led you astray? Besides, you should be worried for her safety. There she is right now."

Jan turned just in time to see her walk into the room. Her eyes didn't turn his way this time, but he was distinctively not drawing any attention to himself. The men were looking at her. There were a group of them siting together and she further entertained them. Soon other girls walked in as well and picked up the slack. The room was quite full after all and Dinah only dealt with the highest paying customers. They were only two guys standing against a wall trying not to get noticed, the girls avoided them. Jan watched Dinah intently until Jasper tapped his shoulder.

"Let's not be so obvious," Jasper warned. "I'll keep an eye on her. Let's blend into the crowd."

Jasper took a seat in a nearby sitting area. It was the last empty one they could occupy and just as suddenly as they sat down, a stripper came to entertain them. The duo found that they'd been "stripped out" for the day and eventually managed to get her to sit down with them and join them in casual conversation. Jasper supplied them all with drinks, more for the girl.

Time passed quickly enough just as Jan was beginning to succumb to the warm environment in complete tiredness, Jasper tapped him and indicated that "his girl" was finally leaving with the man. By then, the girl had fallen out in drunken tiredness so it was quite easy for them to get up from the area and walk out of the establishment. The night was coming to a close anyhow. Jan followed Jasper who seemed to know intuitively where she was headed, but then Jasper's senses had always been far sharper than Jan's so he felt completely at ease that they would not lose her and that no one would notice them following.

"Now you see that apartment? They're in there," Jasper said confidently after they'd stepped out of the manor and travelled on their chocobo mounts a little ways.

"Alright, I'll take your word for it."

"Now, Jan, this is something you need to do on your own. I think I'll head home for the night. I await the good news in the morning."

"Wait, you're leaving?" Jan said surprised at the other.

"Yes. What more can I do here? I'll certainly be in the way if I go any further with you."

"I suppose you have a point. Thanks for the help, friend. Without you, I wouldn't in my wildest dream go looking for her again."

"I'm glad I could be of service. But don't give me all the credit. In the end, I really just wanted to see some naked girls," Jasper said with a grin. The Elezen climbed on his mount smoothly. "You take care," he said with a brief wave.

"You too!" Jan shouted to Jasper's disappearing form as he rode out into the night.

Jan took a deep breath. Now he had to do this part on his own. He made sure not to make too much noise as he walked the length of the small yard and into the hallway. Jasper had pointed on the bottom left apartment so he faced this very door. Then he began to have second thoughts. How did he know anything bad was happening? What if they weren't doing anything at this point? What if the man hadn't wanted sex at all and they were peacefully talking to each other? Maybe they were just good friends. And what was he? A manic stalker at this point. A man obsessed with a woman who probably didn't remember him at all and why should she? They hadn't spent very long together that night. It could have been his imagination running rampant that night, hormones raging, or the excitement of gaining audience with a woman who could have any man she wanted.

And then he heard a scream that jolted him out of his reverie. Without further hesitation, he knocked open the door. Even in the dim light he could make out a lot of movement on the couch and it sounded a lot like struggle. Still they could have still been having sex. The movement paused as soon as he stepped in. He could no longer hear the female's voice.

"Who there?" asked the very slurred, rough voice of the man.

"I thought I heard a woman in distress."

"Go about your way. Is this one of your nosy neighbors?" the man asked now to the woman that was probably beneath him.

Jan had already turned away from them—he had no desire to see just what position the man happened to be in. He just happened to glance at a very hairy back and wanted to see no more of it.

"Yes, probably," the woman said drowsily.

Jan couldn't hear even the smallest amount of terror in her voice. "Are you sure you're okay?" he asked again.

"Whazzit it to you? Hasn't anyone taught you not to interrupt grown folk bidness? Git out of here 'fore I remove you myself."

Jan wasn't at all put off by the man. "I want her to answer," he insisted.

"Boy!" the man warned.

And the man had finally pressed the right button. No drunken man was going to call him that in such a degrading tone. Jan was on him surprisingly quick pulling him off the woman and slinging him to the ground. Dinah shouted in surprise. The drunken man struggled to get back to his feet, but when he did, Jan punched him squarely in the mouth and he was down for good.

"What in the _world_?" Dinah exclaimed.

Jan didn't get a good look at her and he hadn't turned towards her. "I'm sorry if I ruined your night. I should go." He had all the intentions of leaving right then and there too embarrassed to face her.

"Wait…please…I'm a bit handcuffed," she said sheepishly.

A little surprised, Jan finally turned to her and beheld her naked form. Her hands were pulled back, handcuffed to the arms of the table, but his eyes were more drawn to the crawl of blood streaking down her neck. She looked so worn out now, not the way she had appeared on stage; vibrant and happy. Her makeup was running obviously ruined by tears.

"Are you going to free me or keep staring?" Dinah asked watching the man closely.

"Sorry," Jan said quietly.

He disappeared for a bit in the dark to search the other man's pockets and found the key easily enough. He couldn't make direct eye contact with her as he stretched over her to reach the key holes in the handcuffs. As soon as she could, she pulled her arms close to her and rubbed her wrists.

"I would thank you, but you've lost me half a K with that stunt you've pulled."

"Is that what that man was willing to pay you?"

Dinah nodded, "Of course. My services aren't cheap. And what are you, my knight in shining armor? I saw you watching me intently tonight. Should have put up some money—I'd have enjoyed doing you," she said with the beginnings of a smile.

"Do you not remember me?" Jan asked cautiously.

Dinah looked at him evenly. "Well, would you hate me if I said I feigned ignorance in hope that you'd put up some more money for me? Come, sit down."

She had been laying down the length of the couch. When he came over, she pulled her legs closer to herself and leaned back on the armrest.

"You know, you haven't changed very much," Dinah said as she reached her arm out and turned his face towards his. "Well, shorter hair, but it suits you. Oh, don't be bashful."

"I didn't think I'd see you again. And when I saw you on that stage—

"Stage magic," Dinah said matter of factly. "I am getting up in the years and I've lived what most would say a hard life. I wear a lot of makeup. It's okay. I'm not afraid to say it at least to you."

"Dinah," Jan began. He drew a smile from her using that name. "Do you still enjoy your line of work?"

She shook her head. "Not anymore. Men are so much more rough than I remembered. After the Calamity, things got a lot worse. So many people wanted to 'feel good', forget about their own troubles, and live out their fantasies. That's what this man was doing tonight and he paid top dollar for it. The money is good, but sometimes…not good enough."

Jan gave her a sympathetic look. "This is your place?"

She nodded. "It's been mine for quite some years."

"Where's your kitchen?"

Dinah gave him a strange look. "Back there," she said indicating the area right behind them.

"I'll be right back."

True to his word, he didn't take much time going to the kitchen, wetting a towel and filling a plastic cup with water. He took these items back to her. She was exhausted, he could tell and she was thankful for the water and he carefully wiped the blood from her.

"He was quite fond of pointy objects," she said as he did this.

"I have a friend who can heal you as good as new," Jan said as he began to notice other scars on her body.

"You want to know something, Jan, I'm secretly glad that you came…"

Jan was startled when her hand grabbed for his cock. He looked at her in a perplexed manner, but she was already grinning.

"Ah, so you _are_ hard, you kinky little man. I was supposed to have sex with someone tonight. Why not let it be you? I'll give you a freebie. In hopes that you might come back to see me."

Jan took her hand into his. "Not tonight. You've gone through enough."

"Now, Jan—

"You've gone through enough for one woman. Why don't you come with me?"

"Taking me someplace to eat? Jan, you don't have to romance me. All you want in the end is sex and we can just skip to that now."

"I'd rather just have you—sex can come later."

"Who do you think you are? Walking in here, interrupting my work, losing me money and now you don't want to have sex with me?"

Jan was surprised at her outburst, but then he began to realize what kind of woman Dinah was. The only thing she knew how to do well was sex and this was her livelihood. This was her life. Even if there was some nice man that she might have been attracted to, at the end of the day, she still had to go back to work.

"Dinah, I could give a damn about you losing money this night—you've gained something far better in return. Now did you want to stay here, wallow in your misery, and hope that when that man wakes up again he's civil? Or did you want to leave?"

"Jan…it's only for this night…You'll leave me again just like any other guy. I at least want some _money_ out of this."

"I won't leave you, Dinah, not this time. If you allow it, I wouldn't want it to be for just this night."

"Wh-what are you saying?" Dinah asked nervously.

"I'm saying—I'm here to rescue you." Jan stood up and held his hand out to her. She took it with a little hesitation and he lifted her easily. "Now go get yourself dressed. We're leaving."

"But…what about my things?"

"We'll come back for it, of course."

Though she was bone tired, she was beginning to feel excited, giddy even. She embraced him firmly for a long time and for the third time that night tears began to fall from her eyes further ruining her makeup—she didn't care. When she felt his arms come around her, she felt completely and utterly secure.

"Now will you get your clothes? I'd rather not be here when he awakes."

"You can just knock him out again, right?" Dinah asked cheekily.

"Yes, but I don't like attacking unarmed men."

"Oh, alright already. I was just…enjoying your closeness."

Dinah finally pulled herself from him and went to the back to find a suitable set of clothes and then on second thought took another.

"Ready," Dinah proclaimed to Jan's waiting form.

He took her by the hand and led her out to his chocobo mount.

"Now hold on tight," Jan said as he helped her climb on.

"No problem."

Jan tugged on the reins and they shot out of the apartment complex and towards Ul'dah.

/

AN: For those wondering if there'll ever be any real plot or how this even ties to the game. Stay tuned! Adventuring awaits.


	2. Chapter 2

Jasper Bloodstone & Jan Saur in Eorzea

Chapter 2

Upon arriving in Ul'dah, Jan took her to a place that Jasper owned and that he had a key to. As soon as they found a bed, they were asleep instantly. It had been a long night. Jan had been made drowsy by the constant downing of booze. In fact, half way through the night he'd been drifting. The rest of the time he had been working on adrenaline alone. Maybe it was because he was getting older, but late nights weren't something he could really pull of anymore unless there was a good reason—doing it for the hell of it just because it's the weekend?—he'd fail every time. Dinah, on the other hand, was used to her level of activity. She didn't even have to end the day with sex. This was, by far, the easier route. It also felt surreal. Never did she think any man would take her under his wing—not in the manner that Jan had. While she was tired by her toils earlier that night, it wasn't beyond normal. She woke up at a reasonable time the next day.

Upon waking, Dinah sat up in bed. Since there was sunlight flowing through the windows, she could finally make out what kind of room she was in. She could tell that it was quite highbrow—it didn't exactly seem like a place Jan would own. Or maybe he did. She almost didn't notice his snores beside her—she'd been privy to a lot worse. At least she'd be able to tell right off the bat if he was there and alive. She turned to him then. He was still asleep so he wouldn't notice if she climbed on top of him which she did at the moment. As would soon become a habit of hers, she checked his cock and found that it was indeed hard.

"Why yes, Jan, I'll have sex with you," she said quietly to herself and then laughed—none of which woke him.

Never once had she had sex with the man which was beyond ironic and somehow quite endearing to her. The time just hadn't been right. After what he had said last night, she doubted he'd ever feel like it was the right time. Somehow he'd decided that she must have been tired of such things, that after being forced into sex for so many years, she'd immediately want to stop doing such things as soon as she had the chance. And that simply wasn't true. It was clear that he was easily aroused by her and that turned her on instantly. Now how to convince him of that fact? Then she shook her head. She'd cross that bridge when she got there. Right now, he was asleep and she was hungry. She ran her backhand down the side of his face and deftly climbed off him as she tired of her fantasizing.

She left the room in search of the kitchen and decided that it must at least be on the first floor. She found the stairs and searched around until she finally ran into the dining room. When she stepped in, she saw an Elezen at the table drinking what she sniffed to be some sort of tea parsing through a heavy tome and there was a small plate near him with a tasty looking pastry on it. Elezens—they were quite a pompous lot in her opinion. Always so prim and proper. Always thought they knew better than you and overall superior to you. Of course an Elezen wouldn't be reading a proper newspaper in the morning; he had to be reading some really old text about stuff you don't know about. And, look, he wore his hair in a ponytail instead of simply just cutting it off. But Dinah would have to give him the benefit of the doubt; he was probably the "friend" Jan had spoken to her at length about. He fit the description. In fact, it was obvious that he must have owned the house they were crashing at and Jan seemed completely at ease with this.

"Well, are you going to stand there all day?"

Dinah jumped a bit when he acknowledged her, but he hadn't even once turned to look and he continued to read his book as if the situation hadn't changed in the least.

"You knew I was here?"

"I may have bad eyes, but my hearing is just as good as it's always been. Are you hungry?"

Dinah stepped forth now so that she could finally get a good look at the man's face. He wore spectacles which were odd for an Elezen and he wore a very neutral expression (which _wasn't_ odd for an Elezen). She couldn't tell if he was angry or happy that she was there.

"Didn't think anyone would be up so early. And, yes, I am hungry—what do you have in there?" she asked indicating the kitchen.

"I'm always up at the crack of dawn if I can help it. Must have been a late night for Jan, you won't see him up again until the afternoons. There are some pastries in the oven."

"That long?" Dinah asked referring to how long Jan slept.

"He doesn't do well with late nights."

"I'll have to remember that. So what, you still have some tea brewing?"

"I doubt you'd want to try any. There's some orange juice in the refrigerator—nice and cold."

"You think Mi'quote's don't like tea or something?" said Dinah becoming slightly defensive.

"It's an acquired taste, trust me. But if you insist, you can still find some in the kettle. Glasses in the shelf above it."

"I think I _will_ try it."

Jasper had returned to his reading not giving the other a second glance. She stared at him a while longer and then finally walked into the kitchen and grabbed three pastries and poured herself quite a bit of tea. Jasper sat at the head of table and Dinah decided she'd sit to the right of him one seat down. It seemed like an obscenely long table. If Jasper lived here by himself, then such a table served little purpose, but he seemed unconcerned with such things. Dinah took a sip and then made a face.

"What is this? Grass water?" Dinah complained.

"Not exactly," he replied not taking his eyes away from the text.

"Well, what is it?"

"Dill and fennel."

"You're talking in a foreign language."

"They're herbs and not very common here."

"But they grow in Gridania, I bet."

"Yes."

Dinah could have sworn she'd heard a bit of exasperation in his voice. "And what about these pastries?"

Jasper looked up at her wearily.

"What? They're really good. I never tasted anything like it. Besides…it's much too quiet in here."

"I made them myself, but I'd rather not go in detail about the recipe."

"Ooo, homemade," Dinah said with a grin. "At least tell me the secret ingredient."

"Raspberry."

"Duh, anyone could taste that—it's no secret."

"If you really must know; cinnamon."

"Hm, I can taste it, now that you mentioned it. But homemade pastries in the morning? That's a lot work to do so early."

"I don't always do as much. But it takes less time than you think if you prepare ahead of time."

"Oh, I get it—you knew you were having guests over. Thought you might do something special."

"Something like that."

"But…milk goes better with sweet stuff, not orange juice."

"I'll keep that in mind next time. Was there anything else you wanted know?"

"Are you getting terribly annoyed with me?"  
"I've been debating whether I should ignore you altogether, but since you're my guest—I thought it'd be rude."

"What's that book you're reading?"

"It's a book on thaumaturgy and I've yet to make it past the first chapter."

"Sorry," she said with genuine concern.

"No, it's not you. I couldn't even concentrate in a library for ten whole hours and thus I'm stuck on this one chapter."

"Tell me this, are you really interested in thaumaturgy?"

"Yes. It seems useful—a logical next step for me."

"Well then maybe you just need a break."

"I did that yesterday. I did that for two days. Only to find myself in the same rut," he replied this time taking off his glasses.

"You're done?"

"For today," he said closing the large exhausting book.

"I mean, I don't get it. Do you even like reading? That looks painful just looking at it."

"I liked reading in the past. I remember being able to run through books so quickly. I was motivated then."

"And what about now? Are you not motivated?"

"I suppose not. Not like before."

Dinah felt his eyes on her as she ate and she didn't exactly like being watched doing such a mundane activity. She was finishing up the last pastry wishing that she had more and her tea had grown cold. She looked back at him when she tired of his gaze, but when she did she realized that he hadn't been watching her eat, but he was looking at her in a way that made her feel not only uncomfortable but vulnerable. It was like he was evaluating her, sizing her up physically.

"Will you stop? You're starting to freak me out."

His eyes flicked back up to her face. "You've been through a lot, haven't you?"

Concern sounded odd coming from him in her opinion. She could only blink at him.

"So much scarring and bruising. Certainly, you must feel uncomfortable in your own skin."

"_You're_ making me feel uncomfortable."

"Is that so? I'll have to work on that. I cannot bear to see someone so physically impaired if I can help it. When you're done with your food, allow me to heal you."

"Heal me? Oh, that's right. Jan mentioned that you could do things like that. And if he trusts you…"

"Am I not trusting enough? If I wanted to harm you, I would have done something less obvious like poison the food."

"You _know_ how to poison food?"

"I do work with a lot of herbs and spices. The right dosage can be quite lethal."

"This isn't helping your case."

"Would you rather I keep such things a secret?"

Dinah sighed. "I'm putting my trust in Jan. Now, I'm finished eating."

"Then follow me," Jasper said standing up.

Dinah did as he requested. "Didn't know that there was so much ceremony. Just do one of your spells."

"In your case, it's a bit different. I'd rather do a more thorough job with you."

They came to what seemed to be a living room and stepped over to a long couch.

"Lie down," Jasper said steadily.

Dinah gave him a hard look, but then did just as he asked. "No funny business."  
"I wouldn't dream of it."

"Do I have to take off my clothes?"

"Maybe if I was a novice, but I've been at it for a long time."

"Do I need to turn over and stuff?"

"Nope, just lie still."

Dinah was sure she heard exasperation in his voice this time and somehow this satisfied her. She watched as his hands began to glow and as he very slowly ran his hovering hands down the entirety of her body.

"You mean you're not going to use a wand?"

He simply shook his head no.

"But why not?"

This time he didn't answer, but he seemed to be fully concentrated on his work so she did not push the issue. Besides, she didn't want to be responsible for him messing something up so she finally kept her mouth closed. And then she began to feel it. He was relieving more than just the constant throbbing pain in her body that she had grown accustomed to. There was also the alleviation of stress and tension in her bones and muscles. She began to relax under his care and she began to feel drowsy. She wondered if that was a side effect. She felt she was getting worked over quite gently and thoroughly. His hands ran down her body many times and she found that she did not want him to stop. It was like spending a day at the spa. At some point, his hands stayed hovered at one point over her body and the glow seemed to flow over the entirety of her. She felt as if she was being bathed in the most salubrious of waters. For some reason, she couldn't keep her eyes open as the warm light became more intense. Eventually, she did fall asleep, but not for very long.

It felt like a moment had past when she finally opened her eyes and Jasper was nowhere to be found. When she sat up, she felt she had a boundless amount of energy; energy she thought she'd lost with age. She saw things clearer; she could smell things more sharply than before. She felt like a new person. She also felt very clean. She ran her hand through her long, dark purple hair and felt that it was quite soft and pliable even more soft than she remembered. Excited, she ran about the house for a bathroom so that she could look at herself.

She was startled by what she saw. She looked _younger_, less worn out. She touched her face to make sure it was real and then she smiled.

"This is _incredible_," Dinah whispered in wonderment. "Now if only I could find that old Elezen and thank him."

She walked out of the bathroom and meticulously began her search for Jasper. She had so much energy now, she didn't mind the activity. Eventually, she came upon a closed door. She tried to open it, but it was locked. There was no keyhole so it must have been locked from behind. Obviously someone was inside and obviously it had to be Jasper. She placed her ears closer to the door and stalled her breathing for a moment to listen to any movement behind it. Eventually she was able to hear deep, slumbering breathing.

"Ah, I see," she said quietly. "Sweet dreams."

Growing bored, she made her way upstairs again to check on Jan. When she got back to the room, she found him already getting dressed.

"So there you are," Jan said upon her entering.

"You won't believe what just happened to me," Dinah said in an excited tone. "Jasper, he worked his little magic on me and I feel like a new woman."

"You look like a new woman."

Dinah ran up to him and hugged him. Her tail was certainly quite spry and curled upward. "And here I thought he didn't like me."

"You'll get used to him."

"How did you?"

"Wow," he said thoughtfully, "I don't know, it's been so long. I'll get back to you on that one."

"That doesn't sound very reassuring."

Since they were so close together, she felt for his cock once again only to find that it was not hard. This time he didn't even pay much attention to it.

"I'm glad you're feeling better," he said as he moved back a little to take her in fully.

"And, now, what are we going to do today?" she asked.

"The real question is, what do _you_ want to do today?"

"Well, I guess the sensible thing to do would be to go back over to my apartment and grab my clothes…but you dragged me all the way out here to this strange city. I want to explore too."

"Pick one and we'll do the other the next day."

"Okay, explore then."

"And since you'll have nothing to wear tomorrow, the most sensible thing for me to do is buy you some clothes."

"Do I get to choose?"

"Of course."

Dinah was so pumped she wanted to go right then in that instant, but Jan wanted to get some food first before going. The large house was filled with more laughter and excitement than was customary. When the two left for their outing, the place quieted twofold. It wasn't until many hours later that Jasper awoke from his exhaustion. He was completely disoriented for a bit, but quickly regained his bearings. The technique he had performed on Dinah wasn't something he did often; only to people he thought truly needed it. He'd never done it on Jan or any of his relatives—they'd never been in the kind of state he had seen Dinah. There was a lifetime worth of neglected healing. Everything had seemed old, worn, and used up—a show girl who'd performed too much and given away far too much of herself—that's what he saw and he felt compelled to do something about it. And, of course, any woman that could make Jan happy, made him happy. He wasn't sure if he had expressed as much to her, but he supposed he'd have other chances.

He unlocked his door and went back to the old tome sitting on the table. On second thought, he took the book and brought it with him to the den where he might feel comfortable. For some reason, as he opened the book once again, he could read it and pay attention.

/

Dinah found herself wanting to learn more about Jan. He was quite open about himself so it was easy, but when it came to Jasper it was as if he had amnesia. It appeared as if they had always been friends and that there was no explanation for it. In fact, even she began to believe this, but she knew it was ludicrous. There had to be some point when they met, some point when they decided that they just clicked and decided to hang out together.

From what Dinah could find out, he came from a broken home and at the tender age of 10 found himself completely homeless. There wasn't much options left to him so when someone took him in, he did all he could to please his benefactor, even become his apprentice. He was trained to fight from an early age and he became a pugilist when he was of age. Dinah wondered how he could provide for himself just being that, but he told her there were plenty of people in the world who would pay money for him to rough up a few people. That and the fact that he had joined the local Grand Company—in his case The Immortal Flames.

They spent most of the day roaming the city and Jan seemed to know where everything was—even the secret places that not too many people knew about. There were all kinds of nooks and crannies and Dinah, so full of energy, didn't want the adventure to end. They didn't actually get back to the house until late in the night. Due to curiosity, they went to check on Jasper.

They found him eventually in the den with a dim lamp reading that tome of his. Unlike last time when Jan had found him like this, he was not dozing off. He seemed genuinely interested in what he was reading.

"_Please_ don't tell me you were here this whole day reading that thing," Jan said upon entering the room.

Jasper looked up at him a little dazed; almost confused that he should be interrupted from his study, but when he realized who it was he began to grin.

"Let me show you something." Jasper closed his book, placed it on the ground and stood out of his relaxed sitting position. "I need a wider space," he said walking passed the two of them.

And Jan could tell from his tone alone that he was quite excited and in a rare good mood. Jan looked to Dinah and she appeared worried.

"He's not going to destroy half the building, is he?" Dinah asked.

Jasper heard and answered before Jan could. "Well that would be pretty inconvenient, wouldn't it?"

It wasn't as if he'd denied that he could do it in the first place so it did little to relieve her concern.

"I need something easily breakable," Jasper said at once.

Jan glanced over at a vase beside him and Jasper noticed this.

"That will do," Jasper said.

"But I thought you said you liked this vase."

"I did?"

"Yeah. I remember the day you got it."

"Well, it looks rather garish now. At least it'll finally be put to good use."

"You sure about this? I don't want to hear later that you regretted destroying it forever."

"Oh, don't be so dramatic. Put it there on the ground."

With a shrug, Jan finally did as he was asked. Dinah positioned herself behind Jan. Whatever was going to happen, at least Jan could protect her. Jasper stood across the room. Dinah expected him to warn them when he was going to do something, but he flicked his hand—a very quick motion—and the vase became enveloped in flames and vanished altogether. Dinah couldn't stop herself from gasping and jumping all at once. Jan was clearly impressed. There was no longer a vase there, not even a burn mark.

"That was incredible," Jan exclaimed.

"There's more where that came from. Grab another vase."

"Another one? Are you sure?" Jan asked.

"Yes, I'm sure," he said with exasperation.

Jan placed another vase on the ground and this time without doing anything at all, it became enveloped in ice and dissipated. Dinah gasped once again and Jan was equally as impressed.

"Wow, you learned all that from just reading a book?

"It looks impressive now, but I'll need some sort of wand or scepter to do any real damage."

"Wasn't that damage enough?" Dinah asked erupting in shock. "You completely annihilated that vase without even _moving_. How much more effective do you need to become?"

"Dinah," Jasper said looking directly at her. "The fire that you just saw, the ice that you just saw are all of a supernatural nature. In a sense, it couldn't be called real…or natural. I can only direct such an attack on one thing. Concentrating on a small inanimate object doesn't require much strength or prowess. On an actual living breathing creature—such magic will need to be ten times as powerful to actually be effective. In fact, if the same flames that destroyed that vase were inflicted on you, you'd feel absolutely nothing."

"Is that supposed to comfort me?" Dinah asked exasperatedly. "Great, now you can kill people in their sleep."

"I think most people with half a brain would find that to be a simple task."

"Are you calling me stupid?"

"_Before_ this escalates any more, I'd like to say that you've progressed quite well in your thaumaturgy."

"Thank you."

"But make sure that it doesn't get out of hand—I think that's all Dinah is worried about."

"Well, of course I won't. Control is the very foundation of any brand of magic."

Jan looked over to Dinah and she nodded at him grudgingly.

"I think I'll call it day, boys," Dinah said as she began to make her way to the stairwell, but before she actually climbed it, she turned back to Jasper. "And thank you for that…healing thing you did for me. I understand it took a lot out of you to do it."

"Anytime," Jasper replied.

"Really? Anytime?"

"Anytime it is necessary, if you want to be painfully specific."

Dinah gave him an annoyed looked and then continued upstairs. Jan waited until he thought she was gone before he spoke to Jasper.

"Seriously? Must you rub _everyone_ the wrong way?" Jan asked.

"It's not _everyone_. And I don't mean to," Jasper said turning to Jan.

"I know," Jan said with a sigh referring to his last sentence. "Some people just don't know how to talk to others. You have to remember, Jasper, she doesn't know you at all—she doesn't know what to expect from you. Time and time again, I keep reminding you about first impressions. They're extremely important and I'm pretty sure if anyone was grading this one, they'd say you failed miserably."

"You're preaching to the choir."

Jan grinned at him. "You sure that expression fits there? If I were 'preaching to the choir', you'd completely understand where I was coming from and you don't—that's why I wasted my breath saying it."

"I suppose there's nothing convenient for me to say there. I'll have plenty of time to make up. You'll be around, won't you?"

"This place is pretty big, too big for one person and it's nice that I can stay here with you, but…"

"Eventually, you'll want to move out. You'll want privacy with your woman," Jasper finished.

"You knew that already. But it shouldn't change things for us. I mean, this city is where I live—you're welcome to stay."

"I said I was going back to Gridania."

"And what then?"

"I'm sure my family would be quite thrilled to see me again. I could show them all the things I've learned in this world. There's always the family business."

"Yes, because you ran away from home only to go back and do exactly the things you didn't want to do."

"If that's how the cookie crumbles."

"That actually fits there."

"Thanks, I rather like that expression."

"There's…also something I've been meaning to give you."

"A gift? What's the occasion?" Jasper asked with genuine surprise.

"The fact that we finally get to hang out again for a little while after so many years. Just stay there, I'll get it for you."

Jan had hid the present somewhere in the house always hesitating to actually give it to his friend. It was something he had made for him and he was slightly embarrassed. Jan quickly came back to Jasper's waiting form and handed him a medium sized box.

"Ooo, it has a nice a weight to it."

"Oh just open it already," Jan said suddenly becoming bashful.

Jasper caught on to Jan's mood fairly quickly and knew that it had to be something handmade. Jasper knew his friend to become quite embarrassed whenever he did anything that he perceived was very feminine. But long ago, Jasper had told the other that his weaving skills were quite impressive. Jasper had received such gifts in the past so this was not a complete surprise. When he carefully open it, he beheld a Dalamud red Cotton Cowl.

"It's very protective," Jan managed to say through his shyness.

"I see. It's quite beautifully made—thank you, Jan. You know this is my favorite color. Now I can look even more mysterious when I'm casting magic." Jasper was grinning now amused at his friend's reddened face.

"I'm glad you like it. Now I'm going off to bed."

Jan practically fled the room leaving behind a very amused Jasper shaking his head. Jan nearly tripped over Dinah's crouching form on the top of the stairwell.

"Geez!" Jan exclaimed when he realized who it was. "Were you there that whole time?"

"Oh, I just couldn't help it! You're always so closemouthed when it comes to Jasper. You two are so cute together. Ah, look, you're blushing!"

"Tell the whole world, will ya?"

"And that's how you really made money, wasn't it?"

"Alright, you caught me red handed. You might could skate by with roughing up a few people, but you can make a living making custom clothing. People pay a ridiculous amount of money for it."

"And you just so happened to be good at it," Dinah said with a smile.

"Oh you're just enjoying yourself, aren't you? I don't particularly like blushing so could you drop the subject already?"

"Fine," she said standing up. "C'mon, let's go to bed."

Dinah took his hand and led the way. That night they spoke about everything besides weaving and eventually they fell asleep.

/

Dinah woke up once again to Jan's snores and smiled to herself. She could get used to this. After washing herself, she climbed down the steps to the kitchen to find Jasper in the dining room reading that huge book and sipping on his tea. It seemed to be a ritual of his.

"Bagels in the oven. Raspberry jam on the cutting board," Jasper said before she even began to approach him.

Startled, she calmed herself before she responded. "You must love raspberry."

"I happen to have a lot of them on hand—I'd rather use them before they go bad."

"Let me guess, you made the bagels and the jam."

Jasper snorted which was something Dinah thought she'd never catch him dead doing. "Bagels are a bit above my skill level—they have a very specific form. No, I just had some in the freezer, defrosted them in the oven. Bought the jam from a small shop I really like."

"Huh, I guess you're partially normal then."

Dinah walked into the kitchen and grabbed three bagels and spread a copious amount of jam on all of them.

"And you buttered them," Dinah said as she sat down with her plate. "What do you have to drink?"

"Still have orange juice. Also, bought some milk for your benefit."

"You did?" Dinah was back in the kitchen quickly to fill herself a nice tall glass of milk. "Nothing like ice cold milk in the morning." She couldn't stop herself from purring at the prospects of tasting it.

Jasper gave her an amused glance and took another sip of his "grass" tea.

"Do you not like milk?" Dinah asked.

"It tastes fine. Just not something I would break my neck buying."

"Then you won't mind if I pour myself a second glass."

"Drink all of it if you want."

"But then there won't be some for tomorrow."

"I'll buy another jug of milk."

"Ahhh, you'd do that for me?" Dinah said pleasantly surprised.

"Of course. I would hate to deprive you of your milk."

"You're really a nice guy, aren't you?"

"I…don't know how to respond to that."

"Yes or no," Dinah said simply.

"Hm, no," he said returning to his reading.

"What do you mean no? Do you consider yourself bad?"

"I don't see how you can simplify things to that degree. What manner of nice are you referring to? We're all flawed in at least one way or another."

"Why do you have to complicate things? You're a nice guy plain and simple."

"Fine, then I'm a 'nice' guy."

Dinah sighed, "You're an annoying guy."

"I'm an annoying guy."

"You don't have to _agree_ with me. You're supposed to put up more of a fight."

"Maybe if I agree with you, you might quiet down and let me read."

"Alright, I'll shut-up."

There was quiet for a while as Dinah crunched on her toasty bagel.

"But I did learn some new tricks, would you like a demonstration?" Jasper asked.

"Quite frankly, no. I don't get it. What are you even going to _do_ with these skills? Why are you teaching yourself how to kill people?"

"You mean: 'how to defend myself'."

"Defend yourself from what?"

"You never know what could come up. You know as well as I do; we live in a dangerous world. We can't always wait for someone to rescue us."

Dinah's expression became stony. "Is that a crack at me?"

"A strong woman such as yourself should know how to defend herself."

"Well, I don't."

"Perhaps you should learn."

"I don't need to anymore."

"You think Jan will somehow conveniently always be there when something goes wrong? And what if he alone isn't enough to protect you? You're left defenseless. You're deadweight."

"You're really trying to scare me right now," Dinah said with an amazed tone. "You call me a strong woman and then a deadweight."

"It's quite possible to be both at the same time. You're a good example."

"I can't believe this!" Dinah said standing up. She gulped down the rest of her milk and stamped off to a different room. "I can't stand that guy."

It took her a bit to cool down and she was glad when Jan was finally awake and they could leave the stifling place. The only person that could ever get along with Jasper was Jan; Dinah was now convinced of this.

They decided yesterday that today they would go back to her place to pick up some things. Dinah carried extra bags with her, but she realized that she couldn't take a lot back with her. She'd settled on clothes and make-up and other odds and ends things. She felt safe riding on the chocobo holding on tightly to her savior. He was good company as always and he managed to bring a smile to her face without trying very hard. She was everything she wanted him to be. He was rugged but not to the point where he was rude and undisciplined. He was kind and understanding and he always made her feel secure. He was her safety blanket. He was also, in her opinion, quite handsome for a Hyur. He was simply a nice guy—a complete change of pace from the guys she pleasured on a daily basis.

After a few hours, they arrived and Dinah climbed off the chocobo. She waited for Jan to secure the large bird before going towards her place, but Jan's firm hand stopped her when he grabbed her shoulder. She looked back concerned. There was something different in his eyes, something she had not seen before. He quickly pulled her behind him. She looked to where Jan was looking and saw a man emerging from the trees, but very soon there was more than just one man, but almost twenty of them. They became surrounded fairly quickly.

"What is this?" Jan asked to no one in particular.

"I know these men," Dinah said quietly.

Jan hadn't turned to her but he was listening. "What do they want?" he asked.

"I thought I could…escape this life. You made it sound so easy. But, Jan, I was in deep…very deep. I dealt with questionable people. There are those who'd rather see me dead than risk having me expose the kind of secrets I know…or might know."

"There's too many of them for me to take. If you stay close behind me, I'll make a way out for you."

"…because I'm deadweight."

This time, Jan did turn to her. "No, you're not—you just have to get to safety," he said this as he held her shoulders reassuringly.

She shook her head. "Face it…if I knew how to fight, we could've taken them, couldn't we?"

"You don't know that and it doesn't matter. I must make sure that you're safe. We don't have time to discuss this—stay behind me and bolt when I tell you."

The advancing men were close now and Jan pounced on the closest one. Dinah was quite surprised. His punches were quite vicious and kicks quite brutal. Right before her eyes, he'd transformed into a fighter no longer the concerned lover.

"Go!" he shouted with urgency.

She hesitated and that cost her the time she needed to escape. She tried to run but someone grabbed her and she was knocked out easily.

/

Dinah groaned when she sat up and she felt quite dizzy.

"Where….? Jan."

Her eyes, though blurry, searched for Jan but she didn't have far to look. He lay sprawled beside her and quite done in. His clothes were ripped and blood ran freely from open wounds.

"Oh no," she breathed.

Despite herself, she crawled over to him and checked his pulse. He was still alive at least. With a sigh, she laid her head upon his chest and closed her eyes. After a moment, when she regained her bearings a bit, she looked around at her surroundings. She was in a prison cell one that sported a dirt ground and metal bars. She had no clue where their kidnappers had taken them, but nothing good could come from this. There was no way to escape and her savior was incapacitated. She curled up near him waiting for him to wake. It felt like hours before she felt movement beneath her.

"Jan!" Dinah exclaimed.

She waited for him to recognize her. He reached her hand out to her and she bent down a little to allow him to touch her face. One of his eyes was swollen shut, she could only imagine how well he could see her.

"Di…nah," he managed through a cracked voice.

"Shhhh, don't talk. Conserve your energy. I don't know what all happened, but we're in a prison—there's no way out of here."

"Ja…sper."

Dinah shook her head. "He can't help us. He doesn't even know where we are. Besides, I bet this place is pretty well guarded—he'd have no chance in hell saving us."

"Ja…sper," he repeated.

"No, Jan, he's not coming."

"He…"

But Dinah pressed a finger against his split lips before he could continue and shook her head. "No. Conserve your energy."

Before he could attempt to say anything more, his eyes rolled back and he passed out. Dinah bit her nails staring at his injured form. When she thought about the men who had done this to him, she became beyond angry. It had been one against at least 18 men. Why did they feel the need to gang up on one man like they did? It was completely unnecessary. Dinah checked his pulse and found that it was still pumping so she laid her head back on his chest.

Dinah couldn't say how long she'd been there watching Jan slip in and out of unconsciousness, but it felt like days. She was madly hungry and she knew that if Jan didn't get medical attention soon, he'd die of his wounds.

"Those bastards," Dinah said with gritted teeth. "Can't even bandage people. Are we supposed to die in here?"

"That would be the point."

Dinah gasped when she heard that voice. Her head whipped around towards the voice and lo and behold there was Jasper. He had a key somehow and he opened the cell quite easily and stepped in smoothly.

"How did you—

"Keep your voice down," Jasper said at once when he noticed her giddiness. "And give him some space; I'm sure your lying on his chest made it so much more easier for him to breathe."

Dinah made a face, but did as she was told. At the moment, she couldn't complain about him. He was coming to their rescue after all. He held his hand over Jan's body and she watched in amazement as Jan began to heal right before her eyes. Jasper was a healer, Dinah reminded herself, this was the miraculous work he was capable of. That he was also a bit eccentric came with the territory.

"Welcome back, Jan."

"Jasper, I never had a doubt," Jan said.

Dinah watched as the other stood up with not even a scratch on him. He was as good as new.

"Amazing!" Dinah exclaimed.

Dinah was caught off guard by the peeved looked Jasper gave her.

"Do I have to keep reminding you to keep your voice down?"

Dinah placed a hand over her mouth, "Sorry."

And as she said this, she felt her headache disappearing and she felt her energy increase twofold. She looked over at Jasper with a surprised expression—he'd healed her without even a second thought and with little effort on his part.

"You're going to have to explain yourself when we get out of here," Dinah said in low tones to the other.

"If we make it out of here. From what I saw, it won't be easy almost impossible getting out of here," Jasper said.

"Can't we go the same way you came in?" Dinah asked.

"Unless you two can turn yourself invisible, I doubt it."

"Wha…?"

"Dinah," Jan finally spoke up, "You'll have to stay behind me whatever you do."

Dinah nodded to him obediently. Just as she did, she jumped when she saw a translucent blue shell wrap around her and out of the corner of her eye, she noticed the same happened to the other two. Then a brown, hard looking skin encased her for a split second and then Jan and then Jasper. Rather than ask a bunch of questions, she simply stayed behind Jan. She did, at the very least, feel safe there.

"On second thought," Jan said as they stepped out of the prison cell. "You better stay close to Jasper. He's really the safest position you can be."

But Dinah stubbornly followed close to Jan. There was no way Jasper was the safest place to be. When two guards came into view, Jan rushed them and left Dinah behind. She found herself standing near Jasper who seemed more concentrated on Jan. The guards were brutal, but Dinah could have sworn that every time that drew blood, the scar disappeared instantly. She looked over at Jasper and she could finally see it—the green swirling light that seemed to encircle him every so often. He was healing the other, Dinah realized. The whole situation just seemed far too miraculous for words. She felt a cool wind about him and it played with her hair a bit.

When Jan was done with the guards, Jasper resumed his position in front of Jan since he knew the route. Whenever there were enemies, Jan would take them, no questions asked. Dinah watched them and saw that this certainly wasn't something new to them. They hadn't said a word to each other and this had become their strategy—like a well-greased machine. What she had seen Jan do at her place was reserved compared to how fiercely he took on the guards now. Dinah suspected that now he didn't have to worry so much about injury. He could do as he pleased and Jasper would always be there to heal him. There was no way they _couldn't_ make it out of here at this point if this kept up.

They were lightly jogging now all of them sensing that if they didn't make it out of there soon, there would be reinforcements, but Jasper stopped abruptly when they came to an opening in the narrow passages they had been trudging through thus far.

"Jan, do you sense that? They have something big waiting for us if we try to go through there."

Jan looked at the other. "Is there any other way out?"

"No."

"Then we'll just have to do our best. I'll try to keep everyone on me," Jan said.

"You can't, you'll get knocked out far too quickly. You'll be taking on far more damage than I could heal."

"But you wouldn't be able to heal _anyone_ if you're getting attacked. And you can't also attack if you're also the one healing."

"We'll have to see just how intense this battle is," Jasper said. "I may be able to do just that. Let's go."

Dinah felt a bit left out in their discussion, but seeing as they didn't tell her to do anything different, she stayed close to Jasper.

As soon as they stepped in, a wall shot up behind them barring their way back. It was all or nothing.

A large, muscular man who wore the same attire as the guards came through the same passage they'd have to make their way through if they were to escape. The floor rumbled with each step he took. Dinah became frozen with fear. How the hell were they supposed to take this guy? Why in the world did she find herself in this position? Jan didn't hold back. He seemed to be fighting on a completely different level. The ground shook with each damaging punch and he dodged all the slow hits the man threw at him. The large man was stumbling back now.

"We may have a chance," Jasper said with eyes aglow with excitement.

Dinah looked over to him and then back to Jan's fight. It did seem that way. He was doing better here than against the guards. The large guard shouted something unintelligible when he was finally thrown to the ground with one of Jan's intense lunges. Then guards began to flow in through the passage. Some even had weapons. Dinah felt Jasper grab one of her hands. As soon as the guards came at them, Jasper was pulling Dinah along as he began to run. She took a chance and glanced behind herself and saw that there were at least ten guards coming after them.

"What are we playing tag?" Dinah asked "We gotta' fight them."

"As soon as I start fighting them, it'll be game over for Jan and then for us."

Jasper would pause every so often to heal Jan and then resumed his running, but the guards were gaining on them and Jan was engaged with too many guards not to mention that the large one had found his footing again and was advancing on Jan.

"We havta' do something!" Dinah cried out as she saw Jan's desperate situation.

"We are," Jasper replied quickly as he paused once again to heal him. "Shit," he said under his breath.

"Shit, what?" Dinah asked not liking the worried look in his eyes.

"He can't take them all."

Just then, more guards were filing out of the passage. They were going to be overwhelmed and it was going to happen fairly quickly. Jasper stopped healing Jan when he fell. All the guards' attentions were on them now and instead of continuing to run, he stopped and pulled Dinah close to him. The earth rumbled and shot up from the ground throwing many of them back, but even after doing this, it wasn't enough to stop them, they kept coming. Dinah had the feeling that Jasper's attacks were far less useful than they looked. He fought fiercely even knowing that they didn't have a chance. He dispatched one of the lances and began attacking with this and he did upset quite a few guards, but their sheer number finally overcame Jasper and Dinah as well.

/

Dinah woke up and felt her energy severely drained. She could tell without having to look that they were imprisoned once again. She struggled to sit up and found Jan just as ravished as before. He was quite unconscious and bloodied. She looked around for Jasper and found that he was chained quite thoroughly to a chair with his hands tied painfully tight behind him. He looked worse for wear almost as bad as Jan, but he was awake. She crawled over to him and ripped off the tape that was across his mouth. He was bent over a bit so she could reach his mouth a lot easier from her position.

"You healed me again, didn't you?" Dinah asked.

He simply nodded. "Jan would require something more, but I haven't the energy for it now. They must have drugged us."

"I don't get it, why are you strapped to a chair?"

Jasper shrugged. "I have no idea who these people are."

"I'm starting to think I don't either."

Jasper looked at her with slight interest. "And who did you think they were?"

"I'd been dealing with the wrong crowd for years. I just thought they wanted to clear up loose ends. But they haven't even killed me. I thought for sure they would have."

"I doubt they'd have any problem killing you. Perhaps they just have something else planned."

Just then, a guard came to their cell. "Aw, the healer has awoken. The master wants a word with you."

"Tell him he'd be wasting his breath," Jasper said immediately.

"Jasper!" Dinah said surprised that he could so rashly piss off a guard who could easily finish them off.

Jasper gave her a look that shut her up quickly. The guard ripped the door open and marched over to the man with a small dagger and pointed it at his throat.

"You'll have an audience with the master like it or not."

"I'd rather die."

"I _will_ kill you."

"Then _kill_ me," Jasper snarled back. "I'll not speak with your wretched master. After what he did to my friends, I won't have audience with him."

"Jasper!" Dinah said again. "Don't piss him off anymore."

"You have a lot of balls, healer—

"Thank you, I get that a lot."

This time the dagger pierced his skin and Dinah gasped.

"Give him what he wants," Dinah pleaded with the hard-headed Jasper.

"You should listen to your friend," the guard said.

"And you should go throw yourself off a cliff."

"Silly old man. You have no idea the kind of danger you're in. The master _will_ see you."

The guard knocked the other out with the butt of his blade and Jasper fell unconscious. Dinah watched as the guard unchained him and then threw the tall man over his shoulder.

"Damn it, Jasper, why are you acting so stupid!" Dinah said even though she was sure Jasper wouldn't hear.

The guard grunted and locked the prison cell back up. She came to the bars and watched Jasper being carried away for as long as she could before they disappeared from sight.

"That idiot," she spat under her breath.

She came back over to Jan's side just as he began to move once again. Dinah helped him sit up against the wall behind him.

"We're right back where we started," Dinah said to the slightly dazed Jan.

He nodded to her. "I noticed…Where's Jasper?"

"That idiot couldn't keep his mouth shut when a guard came in to take him to some 'master'. Got himself knocked out again. I have no idea where he is. Tell me this is part of some sort of elaborate plan I'm not privy to."

Jan shook his head no. "I'm afraid…that's just Jasper being a fool."

"And he probably still had the key. They might have brought him back if he'd kept his mouth shut."

"We can't…dwell on spilled milk."

"But I'm so annoyed! Can't he think about anyone besides himself? Seems like a smart guy, but that was a very _dumb_ move."

Jan used the wall to climb back to his feet. "Jasper doesn't like to see people hurt and if he feels powerless to aid them, he acts out."

He took a chance and left the support of the wall to make his way over to the bars.

"That sounds really inconvenient," Dinah said.

"Well, it's not something that happens often. We rarely come to a fight unprepared."

"It's me, isn't it? I'm the 'deadweight'. I'm pulling you guys down."

"Why do you keep saying that? You're not. There was no way you could have predicted any of this would happen. We need to focus on getting out of here."

"What are you doing?" Dinah asked as he began tinkering with the keyhole on the other side of the bars.

"Picking a lock."

"You can do that?"

"I can try. If it's not too complex…" Then suddenly the door popped open. "And that was incredibly simple. Not a lot of security around here."

Dinah climbed to her feet and followed Jan out of the cell.

"Did you see which way they took him," Jan asked Dinah referring to Jasper.

"This way," Dinah said as she began to lead the way.

Dinah slowed her pace when she realized Jan was having trouble keeping up.

"I saw them go into so entryway to the left and they disappeared." Dinah kept looking to the left until she found a set of steps. "This might be it."

She worried for Jan as she climbed the steps, but when she looked back to check on him, he seemed to be making good progress. The stairs didn't go on for too long. They eventually stepped into a small room that had only one door for them to go through and they took it. Suddenly, two guards were coming for them. Dinah stepped out of the way and Jan dispatched them easily. The small room contained a row of makeshift beds and Jasper happened to be in one of them barred and chained. He appeared unconscious.

"We could have made it out of here already if it wasn't for his stubbornness," Dinah declared.

"You don't know that," Jan said as he came over to the bed to evaluate the chains. "At the very least, we'd still be in that cell had he not come for us. I may have died were it not for him."

Instead of responding she became thoughtful.

"He still has the keys," Jan said finding them in one of his pockets, "Let's see if they work here."

The chains came falling off instantly when he used the keys much to Jan's satisfaction.

"Great, so what do we do now? Carry him?" Dinah asked watching the scene.

Jan began to shake the other to wakefulness, but he wasn't immediately responsive. Dinah stepped closer when curiosity got the better of her. He seemed completely out of it. When he opened his eyes they were unfocused and he didn't seem to know that anyone was there.

"Jasper, what did they do to you?"

But, of course, he couldn't answer him. Jan tried to get the other's attention, but he simply couldn't get it. He seemed to be in some kind of drunken stupor.

"See if he can stand," Dinah said.

Jan gave her a look and Dinah just shrugged. "He won't be walking anytime soon."

"Well, what's wrong with him?"

Jan lifted the other off the bed and hoisted him on his back. "I don't know, but we won't leave him."

"Do you really think it's a good idea to be carrying a full grown man around in your condition?" Dinah asked.

"We won't leave him," Jan said in a tone that suggested he didn't want to argue about it.

They went back in the same way they came. Jan was able to remember the route Jasper took to get out of there, but after the big room, they had no idea where to go and Jasper was more or less asleep. Not to mention the fact that Jan was beginning to falter under the weight. Dinah just wanted them to find the exit so they could just take a break. There was no convincing Jan to simply leave Jasper behind and come back for him later. Jasper had to come with them now and they couldn't take any breaks. But they were painfully vulnerable. Any guard could dispatch them easily. Dinah couldn't fight to save her life and Jan was too tired to be effective. They traveled aimlessly now. How large could this place be? And were they even going in the right direction?

The passages narrowed, but then they widened once again. They found themselves walking down elaborate looking halls—a far cry from what it had been before. It could be that they were getting closer to the entrance or a lot further away from it.

"Eternal…" Jasper said in a raspy voice.

Jan stopped. "What is it, Jasper?"

"E…ternal…"

"Umm…Jan, I think we have company," Dinah said as she looked behind them.

A robed figure walked towards them. Jan had turned to behold the new person.

"Who are you?" Jan asked to the approaching figure.

"That is none of your concern," a woman's voice said emitting from the dark hole of her hood. "You have something that belongs to me."

"And what would that be?"

"That man on your back. You stole him from me at a very crucial moment. I'll need him back."

"What for?" Jan further questioned.

"None of your concern. If you hand him over, I'll allow you free passage out of here."

"You haven't answered my question. What do you need him for?"

"Oh fine if it will help my case. I need his power."

"Looks like you've already drained him pretty dry."

"But that's not what I wanted—it was a necessary step to make him more manageable. I want his power—in other words, his knowledge. Experienced conjurers are hard to come by, don't you think?"

Jan gave her a confused look. "Why don't you just read a book? There's no need to do this."

"You wouldn't understand. There's no other way for me. I must steal what I need."

Jan shook his head. "If it's just knowledge that you want, then I know someone who would be willing to help you and you won't have to steal or harm anyone for it. It would be free of charge and best of all it could be something distinctly your own."

"My own? But you speak in riddles."

"Jasper would be more than willing to teach you."

Dinah looked over at Jan with disbelief. She doubted Jasper would be so willing to help someone who for all intents and purposes had tried to kill him.

"I've tried that route before. I cannot be taught."

"Why is that?" Jan asked.

"I _cannot_ be taught," she said stolidly.

Jan stepped a little closer to the woman. "What happened?"

The woman remained quiet for a while before she spoke. "I…the person who tried to teach me…he…It's not important!" The woman said regaining her composure.

"Do you think it's right what you're doing here? Are you willing to kill a man to get what you want?"

"I'm sorry…but I have to. And you're standing in my way."

She held up her hand and Jan fell to his knees in sudden exhaustion. Dinah ran to his side.

"Stop it!" Dinah yelled out frantically. "You don't have to kill him! Please!"

The woman put her hand down and Jan was left gasping for his breath. Jasper had fallen off the other's back and lay sprawled muttering something unintelligible.

"I must finish the process," the woman said.

She stalked over to them and without a second thought kicked Jan's face in so hard that his nose started bleeding. She already had her hand up this time hovering over Jasper and suddenly the Elezen started yelling out in pain. Dinah couldn't stand to see anyone subject to such a thing and despite herself tackled the robed woman into the ground. She started punching her over and over again in the face until she felt someone stop her. Jan had gotten back to his feet and took a hold of her arm.

"Alright, you got her—it's done."

Dinah looked up at him with teary eyes. "Sorry, I got carried away. What about Jasper? I don't think…" but the words became choked and she stopped talking altogether.

Jan squatted down beside her and put his arms around her. "We have no idea what kind of damage has been done. Now let's get out of here."

Jan lifted Jasper once again and per Jan's request, Dinah grudgingly lifted the strange woman who was quite slight and easy to carry.

/

Jasper fell back to sleep after hours of spouting complete and utter nonsense. They made it back to his house in Ul'dah without much incidence. Jan bandaged the woman and watched her closely for when she recovered enough from Dinah's beat down. As for Dinah, she thought the entire situation was crazy. They should have left that woman to rot, but Jan reminded her that she may be the only person who could fix Jasper. While Jan kept an eye on the woman, Dinah checked in on Jasper from time to time, but his condition did not improve. When he was awake, he made no sense—there was nothing she could say to get through to him. While Dinah happened to sit in his room, Jan entered with the strange woman from before and Dinah was immediately on guard. She was a petite Elezen with long white hair and light green eyes. And if Dinah didn't know any better she seemed a bit withdrawn. Jan had her securely by the shoulders as he guided her forth.

"Only you can help him," Jan encouraged the woman. "What you have is not yours."

They waited for what felt like an eternity before she lifted her hand over Jasper. Dinah watched Jasper's reaction closely. It was as if a strong current of lightening was going through his body. He didn't seem in pain, but he did seem uncomfortable. He had been asleep, but he was awake now. His hands gripped the sheets hard and he began to sweat and it continued this way for almost half an hour. Both Dinah and Jan were holding their breaths. It seemed exhausting just watching. Finally, she let her hand drop and she stumbled forward a little but Jan caught her and told her to sit down.

"Jasper?" Jan asked as he watched his cloudy eyes begin to clear up.

"Jan…I had the strangest dream…"

"I bet you did, friend."

"Wait, I thought…" Jasper's eyes traveled to the woman who sat down a little ways from him. "You. What in the world did you do to me?"

She turned away with a reddened face.

"Jasper, don't be mad with her. She was confused and desperate and she saw no other way out of the situation she was in."

"I don't care," Jasper said still looking at the woman though she was turned from him. "I still don't really know what you were trying to do to me. Will you look at me, at least? Explain yourself."

Dinah didn't think the woman would do anything, but she turned to Jasper suddenly and then ran over to him as if in a panic startling Jasper a bit.

"I'm sorry what I did to you, but please could you teach me?"

"Teach you what, child?"

"Your magic. Teach me your magic."

/

AN: Oh snap, do I see another party member? Stay tuned.


	3. Chapter 3

Jasper Bloodstone & Jan Saur in Eorzea

Chapter 3

Dinah was more shocked than Jasper with the woman's proposal. After all that she'd done to Jasper, what made her think that he would possibly agree to help her? But even without Jan trying to convince him, Jasper took her request into consideration and eventually accepted it much to everyone's surprise.

The teaching did not begin immediately, Jasper still needed time to recover and he was left to himself for weeks while Dinah and Jan dared to go back to her apartment to finally take back some of her clothes. They still didn't fully know what had happened that day. Had it all been orchestrated by that young woman? Or was there someone else behind it all? Jan hadn't been able to get such information out of her. She seemed emotionally traumatized; asking her too many questions at once did not seem like the thing to do.

/

His mind was quite jumbled. Everything he had ever learned or knew had simply been plopped back into his head and the entire ordeal had felt beyond uncomfortable. He told himself not to hate the woman for going to such drastic measures, but it was hard not to. Had Jan not vouched for the girl he would have gotten rid of her already, poisoned her food even. And now he was simply going to hand over the knowledge she had sought to steal from him—he needed time to cool off, he needed time to gather his now confused thoughts.

He didn't trust himself to make rational decisions. Things simply wouldn't come to him as they had in the past. Knowledge was one thing, but to have it all come together coherently—he had lost that, he was certain. It was like flipping through a book knowing what it's supposed to be about but not really knowing where to find specific information at specific times.

There was a knock on his door and it opened before he ever had a chance to consider whether he wanted to see anyone. It didn't matter anyhow; the woman had walked in and was now before him. Her eyes always looked sorrowful and pleading—it annoyed him. If there was one thing that made sense to him, it was his anger, but he prized himself on not showing such emotion to the woman especially since he had agreed to teach her.

"Aren't you going to ask my name?" the woman asked with a small voice.

Jasper suddenly realized that no one had known her name. They'd taken to calling her "that woman". "I suppose that would be useful."

"Emily Hyde. When will you begin teaching me?"

She still had a small voice, but it sounded more like a brazen question to Jasper. He looked at her evenly. "Whenever I feel up to it."

"And when will that be? It seems like you aren't doing anything right now."

"I agreed to teach you and I will soon enough."

"How long? What are we waiting for?"

"Young lady—

"I'm not _young_. You're an Elezen; you should know that we sometimes look younger than we are. With the exception of you, of course."

"You're young in my eyes based on your actions."

"I knew it; you still resent what I did to you."

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't."

"And that's what's stopping you, isn't it? Let me remind you—you agreed to this."

"Yes I did. Now if that's all you came to talk about, I'll need you to leave." Jasper wasn't even looking at her any longer.

"No," she said stubbornly. "You're stalling. I already said I was sorry. What else do you want me to do?"

"There is nothing more you can do."

"Oh, what's wrong?" Emily said when she saw the other's head bow down in sudden pain.

She came over to him to check and see if he had a fever of some kind—she found that he did.

"Don't touch me," he said darkly.

She snatched her hand away. "You know, if I were a healer, I could help you."

"But you're not, are you," he spat mockingly. "Will you _leave_ already," he said.

He was seething now, but Emily never thought she'd see such raw emotion on an Elezen's face. She didn't know him very well; she didn't know whether he was acting out of character or not. She dared not push him any further and left his room quickly, closing the door behind her. He needed more time and she gave it to him. She sat down in the living room expecting nothing further to occur, but after a few hours Jasper came from his room fully dressed and presented his self before her with his usual neutral expression.

She looked up at him. "Are you sure?" she asked.

"Better that you start sooner rather than later."

He had a rather large book in his hand and he handed it to her.

She glanced at the title briefly and then looked back to him. "You expect me to read this?"

"That's part of learning—reading. Memorize the first chapter and then perhaps there's something I can teach you."

"I don't want to read."

"Then I don't want to teach you."

"Fine, but I just want you to know that you make for a horrible teacher. I'd have an easier time just taking what you already know."

"You try something like that again and you won't like what I'll do to you."

"Is that a threat?"

"Call it what you want," he said dismissively. "Now, I'll leave you to your study. Really, it isn't that long of a chapter—three pages."

"And if I have questions?"

"Then ask me."

Jasper returned to his room presently and left Emily to herself. She didn't stay put for long. Eventually, she was basically in his room forever asking him question after question before Jasper began to rethink his "teaching" strategy. It appeared as if he would have to do more. Instead of simply answering her questions, he began to anticipate them. They were, after all, the same sort of questions he had answered on his own a very long time ago. He would guide her to the answer by asking her a series of his own questions and eventually she would get it though it was a painfully slow process.

Emily wanted to know when they would actually start doing things, but Jasper felt that it was necessary that she learned the foundation first and especially control. Control seemed to be something that Emily understood was important. It was always control; even the most advanced techniques required it. If she couldn't learn control, then she couldn't learn Conjury or any of other class of magic.

And so control was drilled into her. In fact, the book was put away for the time being just so she could concentrate on that one thing. Before ever touching magic, Jasper had her go through a series of trials to demonstrate her control—physical and mentally. They spent nearly a week on just that one thing until Jasper felt that she had a strong handle on it. And then she was told to read through yet another chapter.

Emily began to notice little things about her teacher like the fact that he was rarely happy. He never smiled, never was satisfied with her progress, never encouraging. He was the worst teacher she'd ever encountered, but he was still "better" than her last one. He was not only strict, but stubborn. Often, she wanted to do things a different way, but Jasper would not budge on his way. Emily had initially thought that he was a clean, well-groomed man, but his hair would be unkempt on most days, haphazardly thrown into a ponytail as if it were a second thought and sometimes he'd forget to wash. Sometimes he'd forget to even eat. Emily might have chalked it up to his quirkiness, but when Jan became concerned she knew that it simply wasn't the case. Japer was acting strangely, but Emily could care little about this. In fact when Jan asked her to report to him if she saw him doing or forgetting things she felt was off, she completely blew him off. Not in his face, of course, since he had convinced Jasper to teach her, but her actions spoke louder than words. She didn't tell Jan about any of the times she found Jasper wracked with dangerously high fevers for fear that he might halt his teaching and luckily, Jasper never seemed to remember such episodes.

She sometimes wondered why she hadn't simply gone through with her plans. She didn't care about Jasper, but somehow Jan had convinced her to do otherwise. He was a very warm person and she had been fooled into rethinking her plans. Now she couldn't turn back. As compromised as Jasper seemed, she felt he was completely capable of making her life miserable or worse if she tried to do the same trick again. Emily would see him some days and wonder if he ever slept. It wasn't as if she gave him much time for it. When she was told to go somewhere and read, she'd read as quickly as possible and come back to him with more questions. She could tell when he wanted to stop for the day, but she was an expert in distraction—especially when it could so easily be done. He'd forget what time it was fairly easy and she could get him to continue all night until _she_ felt like calling it quits. Then she'd come back to him only a few hours later being fully rested and knowing that he had probably had far more trouble getting to sleep and had probably slept for half the time she did. She'd wake him without a second thought and she'd always convince him to continue. Though outwardly he appeared uncaring, she knew that he was the complete opposite. Anyone with any observation skills could see that. The fact that he had chosen to have a friend such a Jan was evidence enough. All she had to do was beg a little and he'd disregard any discomfort he might be feeling and begin teaching her once again.

In other words, she had him wrapped around her little finger and there was no one to stop her. Certainly not Jan who was too busy entertaining Dinah and certainly not Dinah herself who avoided books and studying like the plague. She liked the control she had attained in such a short time. She'd been so alone before. Now she could interact with people and not have to worry about the simple things like food, shelter and a place to sleep.

It was another day of learning and Emily was quite pumped about this day. She'd finally begin to use actual magic. Since she was feeling a bit generous, she gave him another hour to sleep. After that hour was up, she was off to his room. He seemed quite dead today—he was sprawled on his bed and he hadn't quite made it to getting under his covers. She shook him a little, but then a little harder when she realized he wasn't responding. Then she resorted to shrieking his name obnoxiously loud which did the trick. It seemed like a struggle for him to open his eyes, but she quickly got his attention.

"Rise and shine, Jasper."

"What…? What time is it?" he asked groggily.

"Way past the crack of dawn, if you were wondering. It's getting late already. Weren't you going to teach me how to do that earth move?"

"I did…say that. I'll be with you in a few. Just wait in the living room."

"Okay," Emily said bounding out the living room.

Jasper sat up slowly in his bed as the spinning world and dancing lights began to subside and he groaned when he climbed to his feet. There was a routine he usually went through in the morning time, but he couldn't recall what that was at the moment so he threw on some clothes. His hair was in his face once again, but he could find the band which he unusually tied it up with and went without it. He found Emily in the living room right where he had asked her to be. She was perhaps the only constant thing in his life at the moment. She had out her book parsing through the chapters she had read already.

"We'll start small," Jasper began as he sat down the floor.

Emily who had been on the couch joined him. "I know about the aether and I know about meditation."

"That's good. Now these things must come together. You must meditate now, sense the aether around you and gather it in one spot."

"Where?"

"Try the tip of your finger—a small focal point."

"Like a wand?"

"Just like a wand."

"Can't I use one now?"

"You could, but I don't happen to have one at your level at the moment."

"Don't worry, I have one." Then she proceeded to taking a small stick out of her pocket. "See? Just an old weathered wand."

"That will do nicely."

"I know."

"It helps if you close your eyes," Jasper said watching her.

"Okay," she said taking a deep breath.

It was better than watching the other constantly pushing his hair back clearly annoyed with any of it being in his face. She sat quietly for a while and then peeked to look at the other to see if he was still awake—he was and watching her quite intently. She closed her eyes once again and settled down.

"What next?" she asked when he wouldn't say anything.

"You're not in a meditative state."

"Well, you don't have to meditate when you do your magic," Emily argued.

"Would you stop comparing yourself to me? You have a long ways to go before you can begin doing that."

Then she quieted down once again. Slowly, she began to clear everything from her mind—her needs, the fact that she was in a living room, the rather cool temperature of the house, her anxiousness—all of it soon faded away and then she was able to feel the aether.

"Good, now gather some of that aether that you feel towards your wand."

She did this quite effortlessly.

"Send it forth into the earth, allow nature to take over."

She was suddenly glad that he had told her to read first before attempting anything or else she would have no idea what he was referring to. She couldn't hear the voices of the elementals, of course, it was a rare talent, but she could at least feel its presence and manipulate it, in theory, to her will. Then the ground began to rumble and she opened her eyes to see just what she had accomplished and she saw a small piece of ephemeral earth jut up from the carpet and disappear.

"That was it!" Emily said proud of herself. "I controlled the aether and did my first spell."

"It is quite an impressive feat, but now you must continue to use it until you feel comfortable with using it. Perhaps next time you'll call forth more aether to make your spell even more powerful."

Emily nodded to him. "But what should I use my spell on?"

"Outside of these city walls you'll find plenty of creatures to use it on. Just make sure you don't take on more than you can chew."

"You want me to go out there alone?"

"Is there a problem? That's how I was taught. I wasn't even given the benefit of being taught a spell—I had to figure that part out by myself with only a book to aid me."

"But I could get hurt. You know I can't heal myself."

"Emily, you can do this on your own. You can defend yourself."

"You sure you're not shirking your teaching duties?"

"I'm certain. I know how eager you are to learn. Might as well go out there now so that you can go on to the next spell."

"And what's that?"

"A spell that can heal a moderate amount of injuries."

Her eyes grew big. "Alright, in that case, I'm off then and I _will_ be back before the day ends so be ready."

"I doubt you can master a spell in one day, but you're welcome to try."

Emily knew exactly what the other would do once she left. He'd probably go back to bed and she'd have to drag him out of it once again, but there was nothing she could do to help it. She hadn't been able to convince him to come with her. Even before she left he returned to his room and she sighed exasperatedly. She was determined to master this spell today and begin on the next before the day was over.

/

Jasper felt chilly and shivered involuntarily as he laid down in his bed. He couldn't remember the last time he'd picked up the thaumaturgy book, but he certainly didn't have enough energy or brainpower to go through it now. After learning a miraculous two spells in one sitting, he was stuck, not because he couldn't teach himself anymore, but because he was far too distracted. He knew he'd make it quite hard on himself if he was still concentrated on his own studying while helping someone on something completely different. Switching back in forth between the two classes constantly seemed like an impossible task to him right now. His mind could hardly keep up with what he had to do from day to day. Emily was at the forefront of his thoughts and he became one-track when he thought of her. He knew he had to teach her and everything else in his life became optional.

He didn't bother with the covers. He knew he'd be miserable if anyone came to wake him and he happened to actually be comfortable. But if he stayed in this position, he wouldn't be nearly as annoyed. He was tired, but couldn't close his eyes. He sighed deeply and then got back up again. He couldn't think of anything to do right then which scared him. There was always something to do. He thought for a moment and realized that he hadn't eaten anything and he wasn't even sure if Emily had either. He hoped Emily wasn't going about casting her magic on an empty stomach. Surely, she'd be more sensible than that and apparently more sensible than him since he hadn't managed to remind her of this fact.

His door was open, but he heard a knock on his door. He looked up to find Jan standing there in his doorway.

"Hello, friend," Jan said upon entering his room. "Was checking to see how you were doing."

Jasper knew he was being evaluated and he was certain he was not passing the other's standards. Besides, he had yet to find his band which he could not recall ever taking off so his hair remained quite loose. Anyone could see that something was not quite right.

"I'm fine," Jasper lied.

But Jan was not having it and shook his head. "No, you're not. I haven't heard from you in days."

"Weren't you busy? And anyways I've had my hands full with Emily."

"I hope not too full. Your health concerns me. It looks like you haven't really slept in days."

Jasper turned his face from him. "So I haven't. What do you expect to do about it?"

"You're right, I guess there isn't much I can do, but I can tell you one thing—Emily shouldn't be your top priority right now."

"Yes, I know. State the obvious."

"Is it obvious to you?" Jan questioned, "Seems like you're having trouble prioritizing."

"What are you talking about? I can prioritize quite fine on my own."

"Yeah?" Jan said unbelievingly. "Well, then I'm sure you would have no problem finding this then," he said as he presented something to the other in his hand.

Jasper grew slightly annoyed when he found it to be that band he just couldn't seem to find. He took it from the other quickly. "Dare I ask, where did you find it?"

"Oh, but you should know, you put it there," Jan said.

"I don't have time for this—just tell me."

"You really don't know?" Jan asked a bit amazed. "It was in plain sight in the same bathroom you use every day and for as long as I can remember on the sink. If you'd visited the bathroom, you would have found it."

"Alright, Jan, you've made your point. But there isn't anything to do for it, now is there?"

"Well, the first step to fixing a problem is knowing there is one in the first place."

"Are we really doing this right now?"

"Why not? You're not particularly busy right now. Emily's not around."  
"That's not the point," Jasper said exasperatedly. "I'm _not_ a problem that needs to be fixed."

"I'm not saying that. I'm saying that you _have_ a problem not that you are one."

"We're cutting hairs."

"Splitting, not cutting and it is a big difference."

"Jan," Jasper said wearily, "Will you just—

"Leave?" Jan said finishing the other's sentence. "You always do that when you're trying to avoid the issue."

"Whatever issue I have, I don't feel like dealing with it right now—can you understand that much? I appreciate that you took time out just to come and see me, but it was unnecessary."

"Unnecessary?"

"Yes, unnecessary. I can take care of myself. I've done so for years now."

"No one was saying that you couldn't. It's just—

"Jan, leave it."

Jan gave the other a long look and then crossed his arms. "I see you're being stubborn right noe. I'll come back later."

"Don't bother," Jasper said as the other one was turning to leave. "This is something that I have to deal with. It doesn't concern you."

"Alright," Jan said with a sigh. "I'll say no more about it. I suppose you know what you're doing."

With that, Jan finally did leave, but Jasper didn't believe for a second that Jan would let the matter rest—it wasn't in his nature."

Jasper might have been annoyed had he not appreciated the other's concern. It was nice to know that there was someone else concerned about his health. So often he concentrated on everyone else's injuries that he neglected his own. Now that he was here alone, he could finally begin deciphering through his confused thoughts and begin to put things back in order. He hadn't actively tried to do anything like this before as Jan said, the first step was acknowledging that there was a problem in the first place. He identified it, put it in perspective and began to slowly move towards the solution.

But then he suspected that something truly wasn't right. After hearing what Emily had attempted to do to him, Jasper expected he'd need some time to readjust, but after almost two months, he didn't think he should still feel this foggy. He didn't like being in such a haze. He knew he forgot things on a daily basis as if his mind was always on other more important things or what he now deemed as important. He wanted to tell Jan as much but he didn't want to worry him anymore than he already was. Jan needed to keep his attentions on Dinah not him. But he couldn't deny that he did feel strange, very strange. It was a feeling that hadn't left him since the woman first began to work her magic on him back at the dungeon.

/

When Emily came back to the house, the night was still young. She'd become overjoyed when aether began to flow from her wand so effortlessly. She had become a little too excited and over worked herself casting the spell she had learned on the creatures outside the walls. Though she wanted to move on to the next spell—she knew her limits and that she could only push her body so far. Besides, she still needed to have some reserves.

She looked for Jasper and found him in his room with the lights on because, of course, he hadn't thought to turn them off. He was dead to the world once again, but this time she didn't have a mind to wake him. He didn't appear the slightest bit comfortable which was what she expected. Were he not so deeply asleep, he might have been tossing and turning. She walked over to the side of his bed and took up one of his hands. She closed her eyes preparing the third stage of her summoning spell. Her mouth twisted into a cruel smile—she couldn't help the irony of it all. Never in a million years did she think her plan would run so smoothly. Already, she'd fooled both Jan and her host into thinking that she had desperately needed his knowledge and that the reason for his strange malady from before had been because she had somehow confiscated his knowledge. Emily wasn't even sure if such a spell even existed. Though she may not have been knowledgeable in the traditional uses of magic, she had been taught her own brand. Her old teacher had been none other than her mother and she was a hard teacher with a sharp tongue and harsh punishments. She _had_ been scarred by her style of teachings in the past—that part was true—but she wasn't anymore, not after she realized how valuable her mother's lessons had been. Now she wanted her mother back. They had had plans before her life was cut short by cancer, but Emily was determined to reverse her fate.

Emily had been looking for just the right host and Jasper was the finest candidate. It was too bad he was man and not a woman, but Emily had already wasted two years searching and Jasper met all her other qualifications. Jasper was more than proficient in magic use—he was better than her and his control was unshakable even in the state that he was in now. He had a strong Elezen mind and body and he took care of himself. All these things she had looked at before coming to her final decision. That was why she stood here now repeating the incantation that she'd memorized by heart years ago. She'd chosen this time to continue her spell because she needed quiet and she could not be interrupted. Even more, at least in this stage, she could not explain her actions or try to hide it from others. In other words, she had to be discreet.

She exerted her control over him. "Repeat after me Elezen: Eternal rest for one's lost soul."

Emily waited and then she heard the soft rumble of his voice murmuring the same words.

"A spell to end Fate's dominion, to guide one's lost soul back, to relinquish the shackles of death."

She waited for him to repeat her words and he did and then she placed his hand down. She stumbled back with utter exhaustion. She really had over done it today, but it was all for a good cause. Emily watched the other for a while trying to picture him as her mother, but it didn't quite fit. With a shrug, she finally left and wasn't back up until at least 10am the next morning.

When she came to check on Jasper, surprisingly he was already awake, but once again it appeared as if he hadn't gotten enough sleep last night—this didn't surprise her. He looked at her wearily probably already knowing what she had come for. She took out her wand for good measure and gave him a bright smile.

"I take it you've mastered you're first spell," Jasper said noting her mood.

"I did."

"Your control was quite impressive yesterday and you've made your magic far more potent."

"But h-how did you know that?" Emily said a little surprised. "Were you spying on me while I was away?"

"I wouldn't say spying. I could sense your magic—you weren't very far away."

"Can you do that with anyone?"

"Anyone who I've spent a good amount of time with, like you. You sound concerned. I just wanted to make sure you weren't overextending yourself out there."

"Was I?"

"A little, but you're a novice, you did quite well."

"Oh, thank you. I do aim to please," Emily said with a courteous smile.

"You shouldn't. Aim only to improve yourself. Others will depend on your fortitude and you must depend on yourself."

"I'll keep that in mind. Now—about that new spell you're going to teach me."

Jasper gave her a brief grin. "I was stalling. Meet me in the living room again."

She could hear the weariness in his tone and she wondered just how much time and effort would be put into this healing spell. She knew in theory how it worked according to her reading, but she had never actually done it, too afraid to do it without Jasper's guidance. Emily made her way to the said room and sat down on the soft carpet against the couch. She tinkered with her wand in boredom and anticipation until Jasper joined her sitting right next to her. She looked over at him expectantly and he began to explain what he wanted her to do.

She found herself closing her eyes sensing the aether about her and she once again began to gather it towards the point of her wand.

"You're in the wrong state of mind," Jasper warned the other. "Relax. You've grown used to sensing the aether about you, now you must soften your mood."

Emily sighed exasperatedly with her eyes still closed not sure how she could actually "relax" or "soften her mood".

"Think of something that relaxes you. Think of something that would put you in a good mood," Jasper suggested sensing the other's struggle.

"I'll try. It just might take a while for me to…'relax'."

"I understand."

It was quite a task trying to think of something that would make her relaxed. She went through several scenarios, but it wound up making her feel even more anxious. She was just an anxious person and now of all times she could not afford to relax. She always had to watch what she said now that she was in enemy territory. They weren't her enemies really, but she was certain they'd be against what she was doing. She had to stay on her toes constantly. If she relaxed, how could she keep her edge? How could she still keep her words guarded? When exactly was the last time she'd really been in a really good mood, had even felt relaxed? Her made up scenarios hadn't worked, she had to think of something real and poignant. She began to cipher through her memories slowly, hoping she'd missed something about her life that could help her now. Instead of anxious, she became increasingly depressed. There was nothing to be found there in her memories. She'd only known strife. Perhaps this spell was beyond her. There was not a single moment in her life when she'd been completely calm and completely herself.

Then she began to think of her more recent memories. The ones where she had spent her days in this house teaching herself Conjury. It had been calming in a way. No one held any expectations of her, no one was forcing her to do anything she didn't want to do, and there was no one constantly breathing down her back. She hadn't needed to conform to any sort of routine when she was here and Jasper was perhaps the most laid back teacher she'd ever encountered. If you were going to benefit from his teaching, you had to be motivated. Jasper was not going to motivate anyone and he was not going to hold anyone's hand. Most of the responsibility had fallen on her. She got a sense of pride knowing that she'd learned her first spell almost on her own through hard work and dedication. When she opened her eyes again, tiring of the exercise, she found that Jasper was sound asleep.

As always, he slept like the dead. She noticed that he shivered a bit and that too didn't surprise her. There was only one last stage of the ongoing spell she'd started so long ago and finally it was drawing to a close. Her spell drew his essence closer and closer to the realm of the dead which was said to be a very cold place and now his proximity to it was the closest it would ever be. She'd been preparing his body for this long for that very fact and now it seemed he was ready. Yet she hesitated.

"Jasper?" Emily said and then she repeated his name again much louder, but he didn't stir.

He was not a light sleeper, Emily determined, which was part of the reason she'd been able to get this far. There was no reason to stall now. This was the perfect opportunity and surely her mother would readily agree with her. Emily gave the other a pitying look. He didn't deserve what she was going to do next, but she'd chosen her path long ago.

"Sorry, Jasper. Thank you for your hospitality…and for being such a patient teacher." She sighed deeply and took up one of his hands once again. "Turn Fate against itself. This body shall be the vessel. The lost soul shall be returned to Life."

She laid her head against his chest as she heard the soft rumble of his voice repeat the same words. His body grew quite cold, but she waited and waited with closed eyes. And suddenly she felt his arms come about her in a loving way and her heart skipped a beat. She had to remind herself that this was no longer Jasper, but her mother. She looked up expectantly with a pleasant smile.

"Welcome back to the land of the living, mother."

He was warm once again and she might have stayed there in his grasp much longer if her mother didn't think such things so strenuous.

"I'm glad to be back. You did well, Emi. Though, why you felt the need to place me in a man's body is beyond me."

"Oh, you'll see, mother. He's perfect for your cause."

"We'll see," her mother said as she stood up from the ground. "It's been so long, darling! You know, you never know what you have until it's gone."

"Mother, watch what you say. He doesn't say things like darling."

"Oh calm yourself, Emi. I have all of his memories, all of his knowledge. I know everything about him and I know how to blend in. Now, I'm so famished! It feels like I haven't eaten in days."

"You haven't."

"Well, aren't you a cruel little girl. I've been watching you, Emi. That you can act so callously towards others is no surprise to me. Didn't let the man recover very well from the first part of the spell and you jumped right in to the other ones. As a result, he's far too weakened for me to begin my plans."

"I'm sorry. I just…spent so long looking for the right host. I thought you were getting impatient…"

"Oh it's alright, darling," she said with a playful smile. "I was only teasing. You did right by me. A few setbacks I was prepared for. Now go find me something to eat in here," she ordered.

Emily bounded off to the kitchen and her mother calmly made her way to the dining room and sat down at the place Jasper usually sat. Eventually, Emily came back in with a simple sandwich and placed it in front of her mother who looked at it critically.

"Whole wheat bread? There's nothing better in there?"

"No," Emily said shaking her head. "He's very healthy."

"I can see that. Disgustingly so." She took up the sandwich and found that she was quite delighted with it. "But I forget, my taste buds are not my own," she said through a mouthful. When she was finished, she handed the plate back to Emily. "Make more."

"Now, mother, I chose this body for a reason because he was healthy. He doesn't eat very much in one sitting."

"Is that concern I hear in your voice?" Then she laughed. "Are you more concerned for me or for him?"

Emily grew embarrassed as her ears began to turn red. She turned on her heels and made two more sandwiches for her mother and gave it back to her quickly. She was only able to make it through the first sandwich much to her disappointment.

"Here, take the last one. I can't stomach anymore."

"Thank you, mother."

"You pitiful little girl. I sense that you do harbor some feelings towards him. Good. I'll use that to my advantage."

Emily could only look down at her sandwich. She couldn't bear to look at her mother and she'd grown hot around her ears once again.

"Speaking of liking someone, I find Jan to be quite delicious."

"Mother! You can't—

"I can and I will. Besides, I'm bored. I am a woman first and foremost and since you felt the need to rush your little spell, now I have time on my hands for extracurricular activities."

Emily's eyes grew big. "Mother…please. It's too soon to blow your cover."

"Oh, I won't blow my cover. I can see things that Jasper cannot," she said with a mischievous grin. "Why don't you continue on with your Conjury technique, we may need your skills in the future. I'll go see what Jan is up to."

"He's probably with his girlfriend."

"We'll have to see," she said standing up but then she swayed a bit on her feet and caught the chair for support. "But I forgot how tired I feel. I'll rest first then. But you continue with your art, girl, you hear me?"

"Yes, mother," Emily said with a nod.

Emily watched the other make her way to Jasper's room. She followed behind just in case something happened. Her mother seemed quite unsteady on her feet. When she got to the bed, her mother simply fell upon it and was asleep in two seconds. At least her mother's foolishness could be stalled for a few days, but Emily had no doubt that her mother wasn't going to change her mind. Once her mother wanted something, she got it no matter what.

/

Emily's mother didn't wake again until approximately three days later and when she did, she was in a complete daze. She groaned as she lifted herself out of bed. When the daze left her, she went to the bathroom Jasper always went to clean himself up. She found the ponytail that was in her hair to be dreadful so she took it out and let her hair fall down about her. There was nothing like feeling soft hair on her cheeks. How could one spend their entire life always tying their hair up out of the way? She brushed until she made it quite straight and then continued on with the rest of her morning routine.

As soon as she stepped out of the bathroom she spied Jan coming down the stairs. She casually made her way over to the handsome blond man.

"Jan, there's something urgent I need to speak with you about," she said with one of the most neutral expressions she could muster. She understood that Jasper always tried to do as much.

It had the desired effect on Jan who grew concerned in an instant. "What is it?"

"Alone—away from others to hear. Follow me." When she turned to walk towards the den, she couldn't help but grin. Jan was quite gullible, her assumptions had been right. He didn't even question the nature of the urgency.

Her anticipation grew as they moved closer and closer to their destination. When they were both inside the room, she closed and locked the door. Then turned to Jan who wasn't even the least bit suspicious or had the slightest clue as to what would happen next.

"Now, Jasper, what—

But before Jan could finish, she pushed him against the wall and then began kissing him with all the bottled up passion she'd gathered over the years. She hadn't kissed anyone in a very long time and especially not someone as handsome as Jan. She'd been born ugly and she had an equally unattractive personality. No one could stay with her for long. Now was different, she could tell. She had a knack for sensing who liked who and she could tell that Jan liked Jasper far more than he was letting on. She knew she had startled him. He was so startled, in fact, that he was frozen in place and simply allowed her groping hands until his senses came back to him and he began to push off the other, but she could tell that his heart wasn't in it. She paused for his benefit.

"Jasper…what's gotten into you?" Jan said breathlessly. "You say there's something urgent and you pull this? I don't understand. I have a _girlfriend_."

"So," she said evenly. "Besides, you don't sound all that surprised, Jan. In fact, dare I say that you enjoyed it?"

Jan looked at the other critically and his eyes became almost penetrating as he tried to figure the other out. "This isn't like you, Jasper. Something is wrong, seriously wrong." He tried to step away from Jasper's closeness, but she only stepped right back into it.

She placed a gentle hand under his chin, but he backed away shaking his head. Then he made his way to the door. "One way or another, I'll have to find out just what's happened to you. The _real_ Jasper—

"I _am_ Jasper. Why would you think I'm anyone else? Was I too forward for you, Jan? You know I've always been horrible with reading signals. Am I wrong about you, Jan?"

Jan's eyes began to soften even as his hand touched the doorknob. "…No…"

Her eyes brightened and she began to smile. "To tell you the truth, the thought of you leaving again was quite heart wrenching. I…there was some things I couldn't leave unsaid."

"Jasper…" Then he took a deep breath and shook his head. "I really don't know what's gotten into. I've known you for a long time and you've never given me the slightest reason for me to suspect that our friendship could be any more than it already was." His eyes saddened a bit. "So I know that this right here isn't you."

Jan unlocked the door then and left the other quite distraught. She didn't pursue him or try to push the issue anymore. If she was right about Jan, then she only needed to wait until he grew comfortable with the idea that he was interested, that the feelings Jan had harbored towards Jasper was no longer one-sided and completely ignored. She smiled triumphantly to herself and licked her lips. Never in a million years did she think she could rope such a lovely man. She exited the room and went to check on Emily who was still meditating in the living room.

"Oh, honey, you're like a broken record," she said as she beheld her daughter.

She opened her eyes warily. "I need concentration, Mother. I might have been on the verge of actually doing it and you just _had_ to interrupt me."

"Is that frustration I hear? You know I don't like it when you use that tone with me."

Emily sighed and then remained silent.

"I have something far more interesting to discuss."

"You're going to commence your plans?"

"No. I just finished spending some quality time with our friend Jan. He's quite luscious and a great kisser…even though I was doing all the kissing that time—

"Mom! Tell me you didn't make out with him. Not in that form. I mean, how did you get Jan to _agree_ to that?"

Emily thought of Jan in her mind. He didn't seem like someone who was particularly frisky. He seemed to have a strong set of morals. There was no way he'd agree to doing anything that would compromise the relationship he already had with Dinah.

"Deep seeded emotions are often the strongest. And he didn't really agree to it, per se, but I can tell that he liked it. I can tell that we have a future together."

"A future?"

"Yes, this transition is permanent, is it not? And I like Jan. What's the use of living if you can't have your pleasures along with it?"

"Mother, you can't mean to keep him around. He's going to make everything so much more complicated."

"Oh, don't you worry, child. I can keep him on a leash. A man in love is quite easy to blind and control. In this body, I can do that. It's convenient really. If anything, I'm doing Jan a favor. Otherwise, he'd be doomed to living the rest of his life with that slut he calls a girlfriend."

Emily turned her eyes to the ground. There was no use trying to change her mother's mind once it was made up.

"What are we going to do in the meantime," Emily asked quietly.

She hadn't been able to concentrate before; she certainly couldn't now in her mother's presence.

"Let's have some fun shall we?" she said with a playful smile. "This is the most alive I've felt in a long time. I feel like I can _do_ things now. Emily, I think it was a good decision to bring me back as a man—they hold far more authority than a woman ever could. Now, child, do you know the name Bloodstone?"

Emily nodded. She was an Elezen herself and knew practically all the high class families in their race. The Bloodstones mostly kept to themselves, but they were hardly forgotten by the general public.

"You know this man only by his first name, but his full name is Jasper Bloodstone. He's quite loaded, if you know what I mean and has a house like this in every city-state in Eorzea. Not only that, but he has far more money than he knows what to do with and not enough friends to spend it on. What I'm saying is: let's go shopping."

"Shopping?" Emily said incredulously.

"Yes! I want some new clothes and Jasper's wardrobe is far too homely for someone so rich. And you, honey, can do with a bit more color—something other than black all the time."

"Wait a minute, if he's really a Bloodstone, why aren't his eyes red?"

"Funny you should ask. Apparently the red eyes that their family is so known for is a result of heavy incest in the past. It is a fading physical trait as incest isn't practiced anymore, but has remained dominant for quite a bit of years. In fact, he was the only one out of his numerous brothers and sisters who inherited the red eyes, but with age the genetic mutation is 'turned off', that is, it can no longer be seen, but it is still there."

"Wow, that's actually…pretty interesting," Emily said thoughtfully.

"Now for shopping. Get yourself dressed, Emily, we're going out."

"Mother, you do know that you'll have to look for clothes that fit Jasper…not 'you', right?"

"Of course I do, honey. That's why I'm so ecstatic. You know how I was before—I'd put on a lot weight after having you and finding clothes that fit was more like a chore than actual fun. Now I don't have that problem anymore, do I? Sometimes I get turned on just looking at myself naked in the mirror."

"Mother!"

She smiled. "Oh, don't worry—I'll strip in front of you too and if you're really lucky, I'll even make love to you—That's what you want, isn't it?"

Emily was blushing profusely now. "That's incest!"

"No, it isn't. All you'd have to do is have a little imagination and I'll make it easy for you. I'm rather good at roleplaying."

"I'd never agree to it."

"Suit yourself," she said with a shrug. "You'll change your mind soon enough. I know it."

Emily might have been more embarrassed if she didn't know her mother so well.

/

Jan paced back and forth in his room deep in thought. Dinah had gone out with her friends that day, conveniently or inconveniently enough, Jan couldn't decide. He didn't particularly want to be left alone with his thoughts; he knew they would return to Jasper and what they had said to each other last time. It had been like stepping into the twilight zone—Jasper was just acting so _differently_, but somehow the same. Did it have to do with the magic trick that Emily had done on him? Was its side effects this far-reaching? But what if…just what if…he had been in complete and utter control of his faculties and he had simply chosen that time to reveal to him something he'd been hiding for years. What if after being absent from his life for so long, he'd realized how much he missed him…And when Jan began to think along those lines, he knew it couldn't be true. Jan knew Jasper practically inside and out—Jasper wasn't capable of loving him in that way. He just didn't see guys in that way. Jan supposed that he could say the same, but with Jasper things were different.

Jan knew that his tastes hadn't suddenly changed to liking guys. He'd experimented in the past and they had all managed to disgust him. He could never take such relationships seriously; his heart was never in it and he found himself wishing he was with a girl. He liked girls no question about it. Any marginally pretty girl could satisfy him quite easily. He decided long ago that he wasn't homosexual or even bisexual, he was simply straight and that Jasper was an exception. There was simply something about him that had excited him, the excitement he felt with any other woman. He knew his feelings to be one-sided. Jasper would never acknowledge them and at some point Jan had decided to distance himself from him. Things were different now. Jasper looked different from before and Jan found that he had no problem keeping his feelings in check—in other words, he had moved on. But that stunt Jasper had pulled yesterday—it had set him back. Everything he thought he had had under control came flooding back. It was a wonder that he'd been able to step out of the room.

He no longer dreamed of Dinah, but of Jasper. The hard-on that Dinah had felt that morning was not due to her in the least and that fact had terrified him. The knock on the door jolted him out of his disturbing thoughts. When he looked up, Jasper had already stepped in and he closed the door.

"Jasper, what are you doing?" Jan asked before he could do anything else. His hair was down; it had been that way since yesterday. Not only that but it seemed as if it was purposeful, not that he had simply forgotten to tie it backup. And he appeared to be more…feminine. He was Jasper, but not really.

"Fancy, finding you here all alone," Jasper said approaching the other.

Jan didn't have a chance to protest before they were kissing once again and just for a moment, Jan allowed it and he participated. But then he stopped when his mind yelled out in alarm—this was not right at all. This was a fantasy that was never meant to be reality. And Jan stepped back much to Jasper's annoyance.

"Are you still having second thoughts?" Jasper said to the retreating Jan.

Jan's expression was unreadable as he moved back to sit on his bed.

"You've had time to think, haven't you?" Jasper asked the other.

Jan finally looked up at the other. "Yes…"

"I've always known, Jan, since the day we first met. Do you remember that day?"

"I tend to try to forget it, but it hasn't worked—I remember it vividly."

"Of course you do. Your adventuring had taken you to Gridania for the first time. There was some performance showing at Mih Khetto's Amphitheatre and I had seen fit to attend it. I remember not really wanting to be there, only that I was dragged out for some family reason. So I sat in the back. And you arrived, sometime into the show completely awed by what you saw. I didn't even notice you were there until you decided to sit right next to me. And then you—

"Yes, I know what I did on the pretense that you were a girl. You didn't even say anything the whole time; you just let me make a complete fool out of myself. You had on a robe—pretty unisex—and you were clean-shaven, and you had your hair up as you usually did and the way you sat—it just seemed rather feminine. But when you spoke, I realized my mistake and I've been embarrassed ever since."

"You were more forward back then. If you saw something you wanted, you said exactly what you wanted to. I didn't say anything because I was quite amused and fascinated by you. And that feeling hasn't changed. In fact, it has intensified over the years. After not having you around for so many years, I began to realize things. That perhaps I had liked you more than just a friend."

"Jasper, if you really felt that way, why didn't you say something sooner? For Christ sake, you _helped_ me find Dinah. You were the one who suggested that I should."

"Only because I thought it would make you happy. When you look at Dinah, do you see me? We practically have the same features only that she's female and a Mi'quote. When I first saw her, I was surprised. We might have been related. But you don't have to settle, Jan."

Jan began to look at Jasper differently—he grinned as if he knew something that the other didn't.

"What is it?" Jasper asked a little concerned with his response to his question.

"You couldn't be Jasper."

"We've went over this—

"No, you _couldn't_ be Jasper. You've put up a good act for long enough, but I've known Jasper for far too long. I know him far too well for someone to get away with acting like they are Jasper."

"What?" she wished she had been able to hide the surprise from her voice, but Jan had seemed so sure of himself then. She should have gotten more defensive about his statement, completely confused even, but she'd forgotten to do those things and she could see the knowing look on Jan's face. Her disguise had been blown in that one moment. "Explain yourself," she demanded despite herself.

"If you wish. The Jasper I know is far too ignorant to other people's feelings to have made the kind of connections you've just made. He would never have noticed how similar Dinah might look to him and if he did, he wouldn't then assume that it was anything other than a coincidence—it _is_, by the way, but I suppose I have a type. Jasper is fiercely attracted to women—he can watch them naked for hours and never get tired of seeing it. He may have this façade that he doesn't like anyone, but when it comes to women, he's pretty much unable to figure out which one he likes more. He easily becomes emotionally involved with any sort of woman even if they only said 'hi' to him a couple times. He so attracted to them, in fact, that he would be blinded to any signs I might give him—and I've given him plenty. Never once has he concluded that I liked him more than a friend. Not only that, but he never wears his hair down. He doesn't like to and it's as simple as that."

It was too late now for her to plead her case. She saw that look in his eyes. There was no convincing him that he was what he said he was. Perhaps Emily had been right; perhaps she had bitten off more than she could chew trying to manipulate someone else's feelings. At least she knew she had been right, though. There was something there, but it was one-sided and Jan was quite aware of this fact and he had accepted it long ago. Those emotions could no longer blind him or allow her to get away with her scheme.

"You know Jasper quite well then, almost too well. It's a pity. You might have gotten what you've always wanted; you might have fulfilled all your fantasies had you simply overlooked your gut feelings."

"But this isn't what I want. I want Jasper to be happy and he could never be happy with me—I couldn't be in a relationship if I knew I was the only one deriving pleasure."

"He'll never be happy, Jan; he'll never be satisfied."

"And this is coming from someone who's doing a poor job at impersonating him."

"Be that as it may, I'm still quite privy to his thoughts and memories. I know everything that he is and so I can make an accurate conclusion. I was right about you, wasn't I? I sensed that you liked this Jasper and I sought to exploit it. Take it from me, he isn't someone who can ever be happy or satisfied with just one woman and he knows this. He knows the kind of pain he could inflict on a woman if he ever seriously started dating someone so he _chooses_ to be alone. He's never had any intention of settling down."

"Wait…none?"

She smiled. "Not in the least. He only said it so you wouldn't have to worry about him. He believes that you worry too much for him."

"That idiot—always trying to protect me from something. I won't ask you anymore questions. It's disturbing knowing that some foreign presence has so much access and that I'm carrying on a conversation with you."

"Now that you know, there's nothing you can do about it. The transition is permanent."

"Nothing is permanent," Jan said with conviction.

"I see," she said with a tilted head. "I guess being friends with a magic user has made you a bit more knowledgeable than the layman. I see that Jasper believes the same thing, but there are things about magic that even he doesn't know. Some magic are permanent."

"It was Emily, wasn't it? She somehow prepared his body for you to enter. I should have been more vigilant with her."

"You are far too trusting and gullible. You think you can fix everything," she said with a grin. "But I'm not too upset about that. It's thanks to that that I'm here now. Here in the land of the living, breathing and talking. I'm here permanently. _This_ is the Jasper you must get used to and _this_ is the Jasper who can and will reciprocate your feelings."

"Sorry, but there are no such feelings towards you."

Jasper smiled. "I see. A Purist. I've learned over the years that in the end, it's the looks that count."

Jan stood up. "I suppose you may be right. The longer I look at you, the more I can fool myself into believing that you really are Jasper. You have his voice, his smile and sometimes even his personality." Jan approached the other until their lips were only millimeters apart. "And I can tell that whoever you are, you must be female. It must be difficult learning to adjust to a man's body."

"Unbelievably so," she agreed breathlessly. Her heart had skipped a beat. He was so close to her and he smelled nice and he was just so handsome.

"I might consider pretending if only for a little while…"

This time he initiated the kiss, but she quickly began to dominate again until she felt something violently hard stab into her abdomen. She was in so much disbelief that she didn't understand just what had happened until right before she fell unconscious and Jan caught her.

"Sorry, Jasper," Jan murmured.

He didn't have a good chair in his room to set him on so he traveled to the dining room and took one of the chairs and strapped him quite securely to it with knots that were impossible to untie. When he was done, he became aware of another presence. He looked behind himself only to see Emily who cowered back behind the doorway.

"Emily," Jan began softly. "It's alright. I'm not angry with you. Anyone could see who the real mastermind was. Come out."

She took a moment, but finally she revealed herself fully and walked uncertainly into the dining room. She looked up at him with sorrowful eyes. "I…know I was wrong…I just…that was the plan…"

"Emily, come here."

He had his arms open to her and finally she came in closer and allowed him to embrace her. Tears sprang to her eyes almost immediately.

"She was my only family," she blubbered. "I didn't wanna do it. B-but…I really like Jasper, he's really nice…he didn't deserve this…"

"It's alright," Jan said patting her reassuringly.

Then Emily backed away from the other as she took a deep breath. "Mother says it's permanent. It's not. Nothing magical is permanent—it can be undone." She looked determined now—a look that Jan never thought he would see there.

"What do you need to do?" Jan questioned.

"I need to remove her soul from his body. It's dangerous. I'll need complete concentration and no distractions."

"Alright," Jan said with a nod. "Emily, I need to know. Will Jasper remember any of this?"

"No," Emily said shaking her head. "His cognitive mind won't know. But…his subconscious will. In other words, it's not something he would have access to."

"You have no idea how relieved I am to hear you say that."

Emily smiled briefly through teary eyes. "At least you can be thankful about something from this entire ordeal. Jan, there's something else you need to know. I'll have to sacrifice myself."

"Emily, no," Jan said shaking his head.

"I have to do this. I _want_ to do this. And when I die, Jan, I want you to make sure that Jasper doesn't bring me back. I want death. That's all I've ever wanted…and if I can die for someone who I love, then I'll do it."

"You're too young, Emily. You can't just sacrifice yourself for someone you barely know."

"Oh, but I know him well and I love him."

"Emily—

"No, you won't be able to change my mind. Save your breath. I _will_ do this spell to save him. I've never made any decisions in my life that were for me, please, allow me this one time, Jan, that's all I ask. Allow me this."

"I really can't change your mind?"

She shook her head.

Jan took a deep breath. "Then do it. If it's what you want."

"Jan, I hope you really are a man of your word. Don't bring me back."

She closed her eyes and began the incantation, but it was in Latin so Jan could not follow. He kept silent the entire time. Jasper began to respond physically to her magic, he began trying to escape, pulling at the restraints, but it was impossible. She was awake again and she glared menacingly at Emily.

"You can't do it," she taunted. "You're too weak to do it. You poor weak little girl. How could you do this to your mother? The mother who's always provided for you?"

Then Emily opened her eyes as she finished her incantation. "You've done no such thing. Now leave this body and return to the realm of the dead!"

And suddenly Jasper's body became rigid and still before his body relaxed and his head bowed once again. Emily turned to Jan and smiled.

"It's done."

Jan caught her before she fell to the ground and then laid her down gently. He turned when he heard the ropes being pulled against.

"What the hell…?" Jasper said in a confused tone. "Why in the world do you have me—"

Jasper only looked at Jan briefly before his eyes came to Emily. He sensed immediately that she was dead; the fact that he was strapped to a chair was quickly forgotten. Tears sprang to his eyes involuntarily. He hated to see death of any kind especially if he knew that person. All their hopes and dreams were gone in that one instant. For as long as he could remember he was always deeply troubled by death and he had made the decision long ago that as long as there was breath in his body he would try to fix it. That was why he had learned Conjury so early on and with such dedication.

"Unstrap me, Jan. I must help her."

"No," Jan said shaking her head. "She wanted this."

"What are you talking about?"

"She wanted to die for you and she made me promise that I wouldn't bring her back."

"She's too young to making those kinds of decisions on her own!" Jasper said with frustration. "She had no idea what she was talking about."

"But she did. She was determined, Jasper. This was the one decision she had ever made for herself and she wanted me to honor it."

"Untie me, Jan."

"I can't, not right now."

"I won't do anything, alright," Jasper said.

"Alright," Jan said standing up and coming over to untie him from the chair.

Soon Jasper sat beside the deceased woman overcome with despondency. He felt stuck. He couldn't save her, but he couldn't stand to leave her that way. The only way to stop those tears from coming was by saving her, but he couldn't so he simply continued to cry in silence. And he stared at her silent form.

"Why…?" Jasper asked quietly. "I just don't…understand…"

Jan watched the other for a while, but he seemed unable to move. He seemed broken and diminished.

"Alright, Jasper, you can't stay there forever."

"But why…?" he repeated. "I just don't…understand."

"C'mon," Jan said as he placed his hands on the other's arms and guided him to his feet. "Let's sit down somewhere a little more comfortable."

"But…why…"

He was in shock and his body had stiffened. His skin felt cold to the touch. Jan couldn't tell if it was a consequence of the spell or his state of mind. He led Jasper to the couch in the living room and sat him down.

Jasper looked up to the other with haunted eyes. "Jan, why would she…Are you sure I can't…?"

Jan began to wonder if he should just let him do it if it would make him feel better, but Emily had looked so certain when she told him what she wanted and Jan suspected that she had never been certain about anything else in her life. She would be forever bitter if he simply allowed Jasper to revive her.

"Jasper there's nothing you can do. You'll just have to let her go."

/

AN: Interested in what happens next? Stay tuned!


	4. Chapter 4

Jasper Bloodstone & Jan Saur in Eorzea

Chapter 4

Jan found Jasper once again staring forlornly out the large window in a forgotten spare room. It just so happened to be largest window in the house and it just so happened to have the best view of the desert plains beyond. There was no way to tell what he could be thinking about for so long. Ever since Emily's death, he hadn't really spoken to anyone. He was beyond being spoken to. He seemed lost in his own world.

"Jasper, we have to do something today." Jan was met with more silence. "You can't spend another day sitting around doing nothing."

Jasper turned his head towards him with uninterested eyes.

"It's been a few weeks, Jasper. You have to let her go." Jasper simply continued to look at him. "You did it again, didn't you?"

"Did what?" Jasper finally asked despite himself.

"For as long as I've known you, you always tend to get too—what's the word?—

"involved," Jasper finished.

"Yes. Too involved with women far too quickly. You expect too much and you get disappointed over and over and over again."

"You're a broken record."

"I could say the same about you."

Jasper turned back to the window. "She died, Jan, for the likes of me because she thought she loved me. She was too young to understand what that meant. She had such potential as a conjurer. Given time she would have mastered it. Given more time she would have developed as a woman and gain the independence her mother had robbed her of. She might have matured emotionally. All of that can never happen. There was no real reason why she wanted to die. Much as I try to understand, I can't."

"Love is often hard to understand and she seemed quite deprived of it."

"Yeah…" Jasper said with a sigh as he leaned his head against the windowpane.

Jan walked over to him and took up one of his hands and gently began to tug on the other. "C'mon, Jasper, you can't stay here all day."

Jasper, despite himself, allowed Jan to pull him forth and practically drag him away from the windowsill. Jan was fully determined to do something that day even though he had no idea what that something was. But then Jasper stopped defiantly in his tracks. Before Jan could turn around to see what the other was doing, Jasper placed his hands firmly on his shoulders to stop him. Then his arms came around Jan's body and pressed him close against his. Jasper being a little taller than Jan found it easy to reach his ear and whisper.

"I know you've wanted this for a long time."

A strike of shock went through Jan, but suddenly he found himself waking up. Had that all been a dream? He sat up in his bed taking a deep breath and found Dinah still asleep beside him as it had been before when he thought he had gotten up. He shook his head in confusion and then got out of bed once again. He showered and then found Jasper in the same exact room he had been in for the past few weeks. A feeling déjà vu washed over him as he saw him staring out the window.

"Jasper, you can't stay in here anymore."

This time, Jasper looked at him the first time he spoke. "Lately, that's all I feel like doing."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

His shook his head no and then continued what he was previously doing. Just like before, Jan walked over and took up his hand, but he didn't get much further. Jasper was already pulling him closer and before he knew it they were kissing…

And Jan woke up once again in his bed beside a sleeping Dinah, this time even more confused. He was already growing weary of it all. When he sat up, Jasper was already there standing right beside his bed as if he had been waiting.

"Jasper, are you crazy?!"

But Jan barely finished his exclamation and Jasper was already aggressively lip locking with him unconcerned with Dinah's presence as he made his way onto the bed climbing on top of him…

And then Jan woke up again in a panic. He peered to his right to see if Jasper was there, but he wasn't. His heart still beat a million miles a second. After a moment, he felt someone's hand on his cock and for a second thought that it was Jasper again and that he was still in the midst of his dreams, but when he looked over, he found that it was Dinah doing her usual check-up. She was awake now and she was grinning at him. It was obvious that she couldn't see his face clearly in the dark. Had she been able to, she might have wondered what had made him so panicked.

"Why, Jan, that's a first. You never wake up this early. Were you dreaming about me?" she asked huskily.

Jan gently took her hand away from his crotch. "You know, it's completely natural for a guy to get a stiffy while they're asleep—it's called Nocturnal penile tumescence and the cause of it is unknown."

"Oh, but the cause isn't unknown, Jan. I know what it is."

"You do?"

"Because of me, silly. You have this crazy notion that I _don't_ want to have sex with you. I don't want to be a tease," she said moving closer to him, "I'm sure it must be tiring, wanting to have sex with me and not getting it."

"That's where you're wrong, Dinah. You don't have to feel pressured to do anything. I know what you've spent most of your life doing. You're not obligated to do things like that for me just because I happen to have a hard on. You don't ever have to worry about that with me."

"Jan, I liked what I did for a living—I enjoyed it. I understand what you're trying to do for me, but it's unnecessary. You don't have to walk on eggshells for me and you don't have to hide things from me. I want to pleasure you; it's that simple."

She was massaging his cock now rhythmically, but he gently pushed her hand back again despite the fact that it did feel quite nice.

"I'm going to take a shower," Jan said finally sitting up in bed.

"So be it. You just remember this, Jan. I'm not some porcelain doll you put on display and forget about. I don't break easy."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"Also, I'll be going out again. Maybe you can get Jasper out of that room of his—it's unhealthy what he's doing."

"Alright," Jan said simply as he took his leave of the room and headed for the shower.

If only Dinah knew the kind of dreams he was having. It was embarrassing and annoying. Why wouldn't his mind simply give up on the notion of Jasper returning his feelings? Why couldn't he simply be satisfied with what he had? Dinah was so horny at this point that she'd probably wind up fucking him in his sleep, if he wasn't careful. He knew he couldn't keep her at bay for much longer, but he knew his mind wouldn't be in it if he simply acquiesced and he'd feel beyond guilty. He was in a dilemma, but at the moment, he could find nothing to take his mind off of Jasper. It was scary—the fact that he could not control his emotions very well. The only option left to him was move out of the house and never see him again, but just the thought of it filled him with a crippling sadness. It was the kind of sadness he could not hide from Dinah.

When Jan cleaned himself up, he presented himself before Jasper and, of course, he saw the same scene before him with Jasper staring out the window. Several things could have happened at this moment. He could tell Jasper that he shouldn't keep doing this to himself, that they should go somewhere today, but he was afraid even to say these things. The dreams remained quite vivid in his mind. His only relief was that they hadn't actually happened.

"Jasper…" but the words became choked and he stopped what he was going to say suddenly at a loss of words. He felt his cheeks burning. Certainly Jasper would pick up on such things.

Jan didn't think Jasper would turn to him, but he did. His eyes were depthless and full of a deep sorrow that moved Jan. He wanted to take his pain away, but it was easier said than done when it came to death. Jasper had never been able to handle death very well and he was probably very depressed right now.

"Jan, was there something you wanted to say?" he asked with half-interest.

"Yes, I…" But he found himself stopping once again. Images flashed before his eyes and he turned away in embarrassment just as he felt his cock grow hard and firm. This was too much. He was beyond embarrassed at this point. "No, nevermind…"

"Jan, you're acting strangely—even for you," Jasper said this time with real concern in his voice.

Of course Jasper would choose this time to be observing and concerned. Any other time he was far more self-absorbed. "I…just thought…" but the words he was thinking wouldn't come out of his mouth correctly.

"You are acting weird." Jasper looked at Jan's turned formed and began to evaluate his health. "Jan, your heartbeat per minute is off the charts. What's wrong?"

Jasper stood up then to the now frozen Jan, but he stopped in his tracks when Jan finally turned back to him, blush clearly on his face. "Sorry…I just had a rough night."

But Jasper saw it. The hard on was pretty easy to spot. "Jan, Jesus, man—have you still not fucked Dinah? How long do you plan on keeping her waiting? It obviously isn't working out very well for you."

"Some girls you just have to be patient with."

"Dinah doesn't seem like the kind of girl you have to be patient with," Jasper said shaking his head. "If I were you, I'd just get the whole thing over with."

"Jasper, you have no self-control. If it were you, you would have done her ten times over already."

Jasper grinned at the other. "You know me almost too well."

"Yeah," Jan said with a sigh, "Too well. How about it, Jasper? Do you want to do something besides staring at the window all day?"

"I suppose I could keep staring out this window for an eternity and never really understand why Emily made the choice she did. But I've thought long enough—I want a distraction."

"And I think I know what 'distraction' means for you."

"Oh don't be so crass. I'd like to hang out with you, if you don't mind—erection and all."

Jan couldn't stop his cheeks from flaring in redness and Jasper was easily amused by this.

"Alright, well, at least I don't have to drag you."

/

Jan kept a good distance from Jasper as they walked down the main road of Ul'dah. It was bright and sunny that day and there were plenty of adventurers running about. All of them seemed as if they were in a rush, sprinting about everywhere. Jasper grinned at this. He remembered those days. There always seemed to be something to do, some deed to perform for someone, some level of expertise one was trying to acquire in their own class of fighting whether it be magic or with weapons.

And then there was the adventurer's guild. Jasper imagined there would be plenty more adventurers in there and, of course, Momodi. This was all quite a distraction seeing the world so full of life and excitement. He'd lost Jan somewhere in the crowd, but that didn't bother him very much—he was enjoying himself without the other's help. Besides, Jan did seem to be acting strangely as of late…

"Please…I need your help!"

Jasper turned when he heard the old lady's voice. She seemed to be looking right at him and when he met her gaze, she moved slowly towards him with a slight limp. He already noticed that one of her legs must have healed crookedly as her bones connected in an awkward way. Before she could make it to him, Jan managed to catch back up again. Instead of having her walk all the way, Jasper moved towards her. It did seem painful for her to walk.

"Do you know her?" Jan asked the other.

Jasper shook his head. "Not that it matters." When he was within earshot of the lady, he spoke to her. "Yes, what is it you needed?"

"It's my boy, he won't wake up! And I've been trying to find someone who could fix him."

"How long has it been?"

"48 hours."

"You sure he isn't just really tired?"

"I'm very sure. He was fine the other day. And I can't wake him no matter what I do. I _know_ there's something."

"Alright, let me see him then."

"You'll help him?"

"Of course, I am a healer first and foremost."

"And what is your fee?"

"I don't have a fee."

"Oh, bless you, child."

She took his hand and was already leading him down the road as fast as her one crooked leg could take her. Jan followed behind, hoping that they had not just run into some crazy old lady who was dragging them all to her lair. But he began to doubt as much as she made a turn into the residential area. She seemed to live in a fairly small house—a good place for two people. When they stepped in, he noted that it looked far more spacious inside.

"He's in his room," the lady said with a tinge of desperation.

She showed genuine motherly concern which was always a plus in Jasper's book. She'd let go of his hand as he followed her to the room. What he saw took him by surprise. He glanced over at Jan and saw that he was as well. The boy the old lady had been referring to seemed very well worked over as if he'd been double teamed in a fight. Small cuts riddled his skin where he must have been struck with a sword or dagger and both of his eyes were swollen shut from nice, hefty punches.

"Ma'm, are you sure he doesn't just have a concussion?"

"Oh, no, don't mind how he looks. He always comes back home having bit off more than he can chew in fights. I tell him it's dangerous to keep picking fights like that, but he doesn't listen. I'm used to seeing him like that. What was unusual is that he won't wake up."

"Just from looking at him, he seems unconscious." Jasper stepped closer to the still roughed up form of her son and he began to thoroughly evaluate his condition. "It seems you're right. A thaumaturge must have placed a very strong sleeping spell on him."

"Can you fix him?" the old lady asked.

"Easily, but I'd rather keep him in this state while I heal him further."

"Oh, you don't have to trouble yourself with that. He'll recover fine on his own."

"I'm sure he would, but while I'm here, I'd like to speed up the process. If you don't mind."

"No, I don't mind at all," she said with obvious gratefulness.

His injuries were purely physical and were quite easily healed by his conjury magic. Right before their eyes his scars and open wounds disappeared and his swollen eyes went down completely. In seconds, he was as good as new. With a swipe of his hand, Jasper took off the sleeping spell and he was awake in an instant.

He was a Hyur with blond shoulder length hair and startling blue eyes that seemed to shimmer when any hint of light struck them. He appeared young; young enough to still be living in his mother's house and he had a bit of peach fuzz about his chin. At the moment, he was quite confused as he sat up in his bed. He felt his face probably expecting there to be bruising.

"It's like I've stepped into a twilight zone. Am I still dreaming?" the teen asked to no one in particular, but his eyes found those of his mother soon enough.

"No, this kind man healed you from your recent debacle with god knows who."

And then he met Jasper's gaze. "Thank you, sir, but I wish you hadn't healed me so completely."

Jasper's eyebrows cringed in confusion. "And why ever not?"

"I can't get used to someone healing me so miraculously after a fight. Besides, you won't be there every time."

"Perhaps you should better prepare yourself before getting into trouble."

The young man gave the other a mischievous grin. "Now what would be the fun in that?"

Jasper gave the other an exasperated look. What was the point of healing someone if they were just going to keep doing what had gotten them into the mess in the first place? He looked over at the amused Jan. "I'm through. Why don't you talk some sense into him?"

Jan shrugged. "Not much I can say. Take some heal potions with you next time."

"You're encouraging him?" Jasper asked surprised.

"You have to start somewhere," Jan said nonchalantly.

"I do carry heal potions with me, whenever I can," the boy said speaking up. "I make them myself."

"See, looks can be deceiving," Jan said giving Jasper an accusatory glance. "Could never get into alchemy. Far too precise for my tastes."

"I do it out of convenience," the teen said admittedly. "I wouldn't have enough money to just keep buying heal potions as fast as go through them."

"Well, this time you bit off more than you can chew. I hope you don't plan on going back," Jasper said exasperatedly.

"Oh, but I have to," the teen said with a grin. "I have to pay them back."

"And what do you plan to do about the sleeping spell they can put on you?"

The teen shrugged. "Haven't thought about it. It's only one person, that damn thaumaturge—a tricky, destructive lot. Him and his friends. I managed to piss off the right people this time."

"You're really enjoying this, aren't you?" Jasper asked concerned.

"And when do you plan to confront them again," Jan asked before he could answer Jasper's question.

"I thought I'd have to wait a few days for my wounds to heal, but thanks to that healer, I have no problem taking them on again today."

"Today?!" Jasper asked flabbergasted. "All my work gone to waste."

"But it doesn't have to be," Jan said turning to Jasper. "If you're so concerned about his health, why don't you join him?"

"I don't need any help," the youth declared. "This is _my_ fight."

Jan gave him an unperturbed look. "Jasper and I will be joining you today. Seems like you need the help and besides, we have nothing better to do today."

"_Both_ of you?" the youth asked in annoyance.

"You'd still be in that bed asleep and beat up if it weren't for my friend. I think you owe us a favor."

"That isn't a favor—we're just doing him another by tagging along," Jasper said.

The teen was still pouting on the bed.

"I think it's a _great_ idea," the old lady piped in after watching their exchange. "For once he can go out there and I won't be afraid for his life. He really does take too many chances on his own."

"C'mon, lad, now what's your name?" Jan asked the other.

The teen took a moment and then looked at him. "It's Malachi, Malachi Firewright."

"I like it," Jan said with a grin. "I'm Jan Saur and this is my friend Jasper Bloodstone."

The name Bloodstone didn't ring any bells with the youth and Jasper was glad.

Malachi climbed out of bed and looked at both of them. "Alright, well, let me get prepared and I'll meet you two outside."

"Prepared," Jasper said with obvious sarcasm, but then took his leave of the young man's room.

Once out in the living room, the old lady invited them to sit down. She limped off to the kitchen to grab something to drink.

"I guess this is your definition of distraction," Jasper said looking at Jan. "What were you thinking getting involved with this ridiculousness."

"I'm sorry, but you got yourself involved just by helping her in the first place. What you do, Jasper, is miraculous. Healing people from near death, raising people from the dead. And you choose to do those things freely. You inherently get yourself involved with everyone else's problems—it comes with the territory, doesn't it? Besides, you and I both know that a team can get things done far more efficiently than going it alone."

"You talk as if we were still adventurers braving dungeons trying to solve everyone's problems."

"Are we not?"

Jasper shook his head slowly, "Says the guy who's planning on settling down."

"Well, it's not like you ever plan to."

"Things just haven't worked out thus far."

"Oh is that a fact? Or are you even trying?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Just then, the old lady walked back in with fresh orange juice and set the cups down on the table in front of them.

"My favorite," Jan said as he took the cold glass to his lips.

"I'm glad you like," she said with a smile.

"Mrs. Firewright—

"Oh, no, just call me Sarah."

"Sarah, has your son always been like this?"

The old lady took a seat on the couch across from them. "For as long as I can remember, he's always had a knack for getting himself injured whether it be from falling down the steps or knocking things off table. You know, most kids cry when they get hurt, but I guess he just got used to it. He just shrugs it off. Drove me nuts. I went through so many bandages with him. I still have a stockpile of them in the bathroom. When he got older, well things didn't change."

"That sounds really difficult to live through. Always worried for your son's health," Jasper said.

"I guess I got used to it too. At some point, there's nothing more a mother can do. He comes home bruised up and sometimes I don't even bother to bandage him. I'm really glad you two are here today. At least for one day, I'll know he's in good hands. Alchemy can only take him so far—he really needs a good healer to back him."

"And Jasper certainly is that," Jan said completely enjoying his OJ and in a rather good mood.

For now, Jan's mind was off of Jasper and on the ensuing fight they would soon face. He hoped it would be a fair challenge. After all, it'd been a while since he used his Pugilist skills against anyone.

"Do you want that?" Jan asked when he noticed that Jasper hadn't touched his juice.

Jasper flicked his wrist indicating that he could care less.

"This won't solve anything, you know," Jasper said sitting back on the couch. "We'll help him today, but what about tomorrow and the next?"

"We can only take things one day at a time," Sarah said. "Perhaps he'll realize something today and decide to do things differently."

"That's a big perhaps," Jasper responded.

Then Malachi stepped out from the back fully armored. Jan was clearly impressed by his gear.

"You look ready," Jan said.

"Yeah, unlike you two. What are you even fighting with? Jasper doesn't even have a wand on him."

Jan stood up. "I'll use my fists—that'll be enough. Who are we dealing with anyway? Just kids with too much time on their hands."

"It doesn't take much to heal you," Jasper said with a shrug. "A wand would be overkill."

"_Well_," Malachi said with arms crossed. "I guess this'll be a walk in the park the way you guys are talking," he said with sarcasm.

The three of them said their goodbyes to Sarah and was soon off to their confrontation. They followed Malachi since he was the only one who knew where to go. They reached a pub and Malachi told the two to wait outside.

"This is right about the time they would be hanging out. Just like last time."

"You don't plan on starting something inside while we're sitting around out here, do you?" Jan asked giving the other a critical look.

"Now that would require actual forethought. Don't worry, you'll get your action."

Jan watched as Malachi went inside and then looked over at Jasper.

"You seem thoroughly excited about all of this," Jasper said. "I can't wait to get this over with already."

And suddenly they could hear shouting. There were five of them and one of them shoved Malachi backwards onto the grounds.

"Alright, let's have a proper fight," Jan said walking up to them.

"Oh? What's this, Malachi? You need a babysitter now?" said the young man who was clearly the leader of the small ragtag group.

Malachi stood up then. "No. Just thought I might even the odds. What kind of punk gangs up on one guy anyways?"

"What kind of punk lies about making out with my little sister?" the leader retorted.

Jan looked over at Malachi with surprise and the other gave him a sheepish look. "Well, it's the best way to tick people off," Malachi said to his questioning look.

"What's done is done," Jan said shaking his head.

"We only want to beat the tar out of Malachi, you stay out of this, old man," the leader said.

"I'll do as I please."

The other four were already taking out their weapons and Malachi unsheathed his sword. Jan was already in his fighting stance. The fight began immediately. Jasper kept his distance and Malachi managed to attract all the attention on himself. They were so focused on him that Jan was able to attack without fear of being struck back. His punches were quite devastating and he wind up knocking out most of them with a couple of punches. He left the leader for Malachi. They both had swords and they seemed to be going at it quite passionately. Of course, Malachi would win. Jasper would heal any damage he took on and Jan had taken out all support from the opposition. The thaumaturge hadn't even been able to cast sleep—he'd been taken out instantly.

Malachi stood victorious against his weakened and finally beaten foe and he had barely broken a sweat. It was a win like no other. There was no pain, no wounds to dress, no blood loss. It felt incredible. He turned to the other two and was eternally grateful.

"You two made that look easy. I've always lost against them until now," Malachi said to them.

Jan cracked his knuckles. "That's how it should be, if you're prepared. You didn't do so bad yourself. Your ability to take on damage is unparalleled—you don't shrink away from pain. That's a rare talent."

"One that could get you killed if you're not careful," Jasper said gruffly. "But you did well. Perhaps you might stop claiming to have made out with people's little sisters for a while."

Malachi gave the other a smile that did little to reassure Jasper.

"C'mon, Jan, I think we've spent enough time here."

"You can go," Jan said to the other. "Think I'll do a bit more roaming with Malachi here. If that's okay with you," Jan said turning to the youth.

"Fine with me. If you don't mind a bit of trouble," Malachi replied.

"Look at that, two peas in a pod. I trust you know what you're doing, Jan."

"I'll be fine," he said reassuringly.

Jasper took his leave then with a final wave. He wanted nothing to do with senseless fighting. Ironic since his presence would have encouraged it. Jasper hoped they'd be a bit more careful if they didn't have him to rely on—at least he could count on Jan reacting in such a way. But he couldn't be sure. Jan was acting differently around Malachi—more reckless, more like he was when Jasper had first met him. Jasper realized something as he made his way back home. Malachi reminded him of how Jan used to be and perhaps Jan had realized this. He grinned to himself. They were perfect for each other.

But then it also saddened him as he stepped back into his house. He was all alone now. At the moment, he was in his house alone and there was nothing to keep his mind from wandering. But he soon had out his Thaumaturgy book and was quite absorbed in that for the rest of the day.

/

Jan came back home well worn out from the day's activities. Malachi hadn't been lying when he said they'd be getting into some trouble. Seems he was hated by quite a few people in town. The poor boy didn't know when to quit. If he didn't know any better, he swore the boy was enjoying it all—the good and the bad. He was an odd one, that was for sure with a few screws missing, but Jan had never met a tank who wasn't that way.

He took a shower and climbed right into bed without even checking up on Jasper. He was tired for one thing and for another he simply could not. They'd be alone together and Jan wanted to avoid that kind situation. He might have been able to take his mind off of things today, but the feelings were still there and he had not figured out a way to squelch them yet. Even now, his thoughts returned to him. Even when Dinah eventually climbed into bed with him, his thoughts remained. Jan pretended he was asleep so that he wouldn't have to suffer through another sex conversation with Dinah—she was certainly thirsty and he had nothing to give her. It took a while, but he finally fell asleep and his dreams were those of Jasper.

/

"Jan, we need to talk," Jasper said.

Then Jan was waking up once again, but this time to an empty bed. Dinah must have already gotten up perhaps even left the house completely. They hadn't been talking lately so Jan wasn't surprised. He washed off and then went downstairs for breakfast. Of course, Jasper was there having woken up first and setting up breakfast—ham, grits and eggs.

"Wow, this is bigger than usual."

"Well, I'm sure you wore yourself out yesterday so I thought I might make you something to regain some of that energy."

"What did you do while I was gone?"

"I got a bit deeper into my thaumaturgy studies. It was quite enlightening."

"And what do you plan to do once you master that?"

Jasper shrugged, "I have no idea."

"Shouldn't there be other things you should concentrate on?"

"Like what?

"I won't be here forever, Jasper."

"Yes, we all die, don't we?"

"No, I mean I won't be _here_ in this house forever. Then you'd be here with no one to keep you company but yourself."

"That doesn't sound so bad."

"Really? Is that what you keep telling yourself?"

"I find comfort in solitude."

"Is that a fact?"

"Yes. Why must you question everything that I say? I wouldn't lie to you."

"And what do you define as lying? Because _not_ telling me something is equally as bad."

"Jan, I have no idea what you're referring to."

"That's one of your tactics, isn't it? Acting clueless."

"Jan, what is it you think I'm keeping from you?"

"I would try to get it out of you, but I don't feel like spending the time. You never had any intentions of settling down. All those years ago when we parted ways, you just said those things so I wouldn't worry about you."

Jasper's eyes narrowed. "Who told you that?"

"When you were possessed, Emily's mother happily indulged me one of your secrets."

He shook his head slowly, "But why that? It wouldn't even be important for her to know—what was she trying to convince you of?"

"Does it matter? The fact still remains."

"Alright, Jan, you got me—I had no intentions. I still don't."

"I'm sure your family would be ecstatic about all of this."

"To hell with my family. I've never put much stock in them. Besides, I have plenty of healthy brothers and sister who would gladly continue the family name."

"So your decision is final?"

"Yes."

"Any reason why?"

"You probably already know. That witch couldn't seem to keep her mouth shut about me."

"I do and it's a shame."

Jan had finished up with his food and was about to leave the table altogether before Jasper stopped him.

"Are you doing anything special today?" Jasper asked.

"No, not particularly."

"Then let's hang out."

"Sorry, but I don't want to."

Jasper gave the other a confused look as if his refusal was complete foreign language. "What? But why ever not?"

"I just don't feel like it today."

"Was it something I said?"

"No," Jan said continuing his trek to the front door. "It's not you."

"Then why?"

"Must there be a reason for everything? I don't feel like it—go find something else to do."

And before Jasper could respond, Jan had left the room completely and as quick as he could made his way to the door and stepped outside. His heart was beating a million miles a minute. He took a deep breath to calm himself and closed his eyes hoping his mind would think about something else other than Jasper, but he seemed incapable of doing it.

"Shit," Jan spat under his breath.

It was uncanny and just a little annoying. But when Jasper had looked directly at him and claimed that he'd rather be alone for the rest of his life, it had made him beyond upset. He'd wanted to comfort him for the pain he must have been feeling for so long. Jasper could put up a good front and he did like his alone time more than most, but he was no loner. He craved other's attention just like the next person. He hadn't made that decision lightly. He had felt it necessary to doom himself to eternal lovelessness just because he thought he couldn't love anyone the right way. And here he was secretly pining over the man, too afraid to say anything. Even now, he still didn't want to. Jasper wanted to hang out with him because no one else would and because he had not seen fit to make any other friends. How would he react if he found his friend wanted to be more than just that? Jan held no illusions—he'd be horrified. And Jasper was a man of extremes. He'd sever their relationship even if it might hurt him to do as much. He'd sever everyone out of his life if he could find some excuse. It hurt him to see his friend calmly and surely walking down the path of destruction.

Jan knew one thing; he couldn't spend another moment with Jasper without spilling his heart—and he was terrified of this. So he simply left while he was still sane. He needed something to pound. Jan stalked off to the Gate of Sultana and started on the creatures just outside of the city walls and continued down the entirety of that area. He spent many hours there tearing into unsuspecting creatures who may or may not have deserved his wrath. It was only when evening struck that Jan felt he had spent enough time there. Then he came back to the city to cool off and to grab a beer.

He did not expect to run into Malachi. He was much too young to be at a bar at this time of day when the sun was going down. Jan eased his way over to the youth who was more or less sitting by himself chugging down beer as if it were water and he was thirsty.

"Jan?!" Malachi said a little too loudly and a little too surprised.

"Malachi," Jan said simply and sat down beside him. "Fancy meeting you here."

"Did Mom send you?"

Jan shook his head. "I come to the bar from time to time. What about you? What the heck are you doing here?"

"I wanted to get drunk again."

"Again?"

"Couldn't get anyone to fight me today—I was feeling a bit depressed."

"For sane people, they'd call that a good day. Your mother won't have to dress your wounds. You won't have to spend weeks in bed healing."

"I guess I'm not sane."

"Hm," Jan said and then took down the rest of his beer. "This is no place for a kid. If it's a beat down you want, I know the perfect solution."

Jan set his glass down and climbed off the seat. Malachi couldn't actually finish the rest of his before Jan was dragging the youth out.

"I swear, how can a kid with a mother so caring turn out so _wrong_," Jan commented as he still led the other with a firm grasp on his arm

"Because I'm an idiot."

"Damn straight."

"Where are you taking me? You're not going to tell Mom, are you?"

"I should, but it just so happened that you caught me in the right mood."

Jan took Malachi to a grassy area—a place that was largely deserted at this time of day. Then Jan released his grip on the boy and put a fair amount of distance between the two of them.

"You got a strong grip, you know that?" Malachi said rubbing his arm, but he didn't seem the least bit perturbed.

"Alright, put up your fists. If it's a beat down you want, I'll give it to you."

"Really? Promise you won't hold back?"

"I don't hold back," Jan reassured the other.

And so they went at it. As Jan said, he didn't hold back in the least. He dished his full fury out on the boy and Malachi didn't last long from all the damage. As hardy as Malachi thought he was and as much damage as he thought he could take—he was steamrolled by Jan's fists and he eventually fell to the ground in a bloody heap.

"Oh, shit," Jan said slowly and with astonishment as he finished his latest combo. "I'm so sorry—

Jan didn't expect the bloody heap to speak back to him. "No, it's fine. This is exactly what I wanted."

"You going to get up anytime soon?"

"Does it look like it?"

So Jan lied down beside the horribly wounded youth.

"You _didn't_ hold back, did you?" Malachi asked the other.

"Son, I barely got started."

"Oh," Malachi said a little let down. "Oh!" he said this time with more excitement.

"What are you 'oh'-ing about?"

"It's good news to me—it means there's still things out there I can't handle. You fought passionately out there. At least it felt that way. It wasn't just anger, it was passion."

"And you can tell all that from just a few punches?"

"I've made enough people angry—I know the difference. Seems like you really wanted something to pound in. Was there something bothering you?"

"Perhaps. It's not something…I want to talk about."

"What do you plan on doing instead? Beating more things up?"

"Maybe I'll tell your mother how you really spend your nights."

"Anything but that," Malachi said with a hint of worry.

"You sure you're going to be alright?"

"I'll always be alright. I learned a healing technique from a friend of mine so I can heal myself little by little. I've never felt punches like those before," Malachi continued on. "They were beautiful. So full of power and passion. I loved every minute of it, every feeling of impact, every fresh bout of pain."

Jan looked over at Malachi a little concerned. "You really get off on this kind of thing. Never has anyone rejoiced at getting punched by me."

"But I'm different."

"I can tell."

"Can I tell you a secret?"

"If you feel you can trust me with it."

"I trust you." Malachi paused for a moment before he continued. "I'm a masochist. The feeling of pain…has always felt very good to me. I want people to hit me so I can feel it. The deeper and more traumatizing the pain, the better. If I must make people hate me to get them to hit me, then so be it. When your friend Jasper healed me yesterday, I was just a little upset—I hadn't even been able to feel that sweet pain while I was asleep—and being ganged up on by five people promised a lot of that."

"Has it always been that way for you?" Jan asked the other quite intrigued.

"For as long as I can remember. I think the first time I tripped down a long flight of steps, I knew for certain. I would try to repeat that experience and it wouldn't be the same. I'd fall out of bed, I'd make things fall off of tables, but it wasn't the same. When I drove my mother crazy with all the accidents I was getting myself into, she smacked me hard across the face—_that_ was what I wanted. I needed someone else to inflict pain upon me. For a long time, I kept such things a secret from her, but I knew I was hurting her. She just didn't know why I acted the way I did and finally, one day, when I made her cry, when I saw she was at her wits end—I told her. And she understood. I mean, not immediately, but eventually. She came to expect that I come home with lots of bruises and she stalked up on bandages ever since."

"That would have been a nice thing to know beforehand when she elicited Jasper's help."

Malachi shook his head. "It's a secret, remember? She wouldn't be spouting out such things to complete strangers."

"So why are you telling me this now? I'm still pretty much a stranger to you."

"Oh, but I felt your punches—I know you quite intimately now. Also, I thought it might help you with your problem. I sense your desperation. You want to say something, but you can't."

Jan looked over at Malachi who seemed to be in better shape now but not fully healed and then he sighed. "You are quite perceptive."

"I can learn a lot about a man through his fighting spirit."

"I love him—Jasper."

"Jasper? That's your friend, right? What's so weird about that?"

"No, not just as a friend, much more than that."

"Oh, I see and I guess Jasper doesn't know that."

"He doesn't."

"I don't get it. What do you see in that Elezen? I mean I don't know him that well, but he seems like such a stiff."

"You haven't known him for as long as I have. When you first meet him, yes, he does seem a bit boring. He never really knows how to express himself outside of being rude and sarcastic. But he's so much more once you peel away those layers. He's really quite gentle and caring. His heart is easily damaged or moved. He loves too easily. He sacrifices himself for the silliest of things. He can be quite passionate and steadfast. When he says he has your back, you have nothing more to worry about."

"You're right—I don't know him very well. If he's so caring and if you've known him for so long, what would be so wrong about telling him how you feel?"

"Well, he'd be horrified. He'd be so dramatic about the whole thing and cut me out of his life—I'd rather just be friends if that's the case."

"And how has that been working out for you? Seems like just being friends isn't enough."

"I thought it would be. But things happened and…I just find it really hard these days."

"Tell him then."

"No, I can't."

"Or keep going on like this until you drive yourself insane."

"I'll think about it."

Malachi sat up then now fully healed from his bout with Jan.

"How does this even help you, masochist? I won't feel like pounding things in if I figure things out with Jasper."

"I'm not concerned about that. I don't like seeing people hurting. I'm the only one who should be feeling hurt—I derive pleasure from it."

"Even from emotional pain?"

"Even that. I'm just wired differently than others."

"I see." Jan sat up as well when he realized how late it was getting. "C'mon, I'll walk you back home."

It was a nice breezy night. The breeze reminded Jan of Jasper's healing and the cool breeze that would wash over him whenever he was the recipient of his salubrious magic. Then his heart panged for his closeness. He hadn't seen Jasper all day. He wondered how the other might be faring after his outright refusal of entertaining him.

"You stay out of trouble now," Jan said as they arrived at Malachi's door.

The youth grinned at the other. "I'll try my utmost."

"And try not to worry your mother so much."

Malachi's face took on a more serious look and he simply nodded to the other. With that, Jan took off for Jasper's place hoping the other was asleep by now.

When he stepped inside of the manor, none of the lights were on. He stood still for a while and heard no movements. He checked the dining room, living room, den, and the spare room with a large window. Jasper was not there. Finally he checked Jasper's room and found the door to be locked. He only ever locked it when he was asleep. Satisfied, Jan went to his room and slipped into bed with a lightly snoring Dinah.

/

Jasper was not there in the morning for breakfast and Jan grew concerned. He went to Jasper's locked door and knocked on it for good measure, but there was no response. He placed his ear against the door and heard movement inside. Then he knocked again.

"Who is it?" Jasper asked wearily through the door.

"It's not like you to miss breakfast," Jan said.

"Not that you would care," Jasper retorted loudly.

"I do," Jan said exasperatedly.

"I'll be out in a few," Jasper replied grumpily.

With that, Jan returned to the kitchen and began making something on the stove. His cooking was subpar, but he did know how to make bacon, eggs, and toast. He even brewed some tea for Jasper's sake. By the time Jan sat back down at the dining room table, Jasper was there as well with his book.

"So what did you do yesterday," Jasper asked immediately upon Jan sitting down.

Jan could hear the jealousy in his tone. Jan shook his head at the irony. "Hung out with Malachi."

"You like hanging out with him now? Is he more fun?"

"No, it's not like that."

"Then what is it like? It's obvious you've become too embarrassed to even be seen near me."

"Jasper, jealousy is a very ugly thing."

"Well you drove me to it."

Jasper hadn't even tried to deny it. "Jasper, there's something I've been debating to tell you about…and I've been having trouble figuring out if I should or not."

"Is that so? You know you can tell me anything, right, Jan?"

"Not anything, unfortunately. I mean why is it you felt the need to keep the fact that you lied to me all those years ago a secret."

"Well…it just didn't seem proper to tell you…I knew you'd take it the wrong way."

"Exactly. We know each other so well, we know what should or shouldn't be said."

"And you think your little secret is something that shouldn't be said?"

Jan nodded.

"Then don't tell me."

"What? That's not what I expected to hear."

"I'm releasing you from your anxiety. I know you have a secret, but you're not obligated to tell me anything. You don't have to sit around thinking it's morally wrong to keep secrets from your friend—I'm saying it's okay with me. I trust you."

"This is one of your reverse psychology tricks," Jan said matter-of-factly.

"You know I'm not savvy enough for those kinds of things. Jan, whatever it is, keep it if you're finding it this hard to say it. I'd rather preserve our friendship."

"I'd like that."

"Now, I'm going to make a trip to the thaumaturge guild. It would be nice to have your support."

"Of course," Jan said with a slight grin. "I always have your back."

/

AN: Sooo, we have a DPS, healer, and tank. Stay tuned!


	5. Chapter 5

Jasper Bloodstone & Jan Saur in Eorzea

Chapter 5

Dinah woke up to Jan's snores and knew that he must have stayed out late last night. She shook her head in annoyance. She'd waited up for him and he hadn't come. She knew for a fact that he was avoiding her. Was it so wrong to want to have sex with the man she planned on spending the rest of her life with? He'd done so much for her so she wanted to repay him, but it seemed almost impossible. He always wanted to make sure that _she_ was happy and he focused on how to achieve this every day. But who was looking out for his happiness? Sometimes he made it seem like a crime for anyone to do such a thing for him.

She recalled what he had told her about his life growing up. He'd been trying to please other people with little regard for himself for most of his life it seemed. He was quite good at being this way and was probably one of the reasons she had fallen for him so easily all those years ago.

She climbed out of bed that day having decided what she would do for herself. She'd been debating with herself for weeks whether she should do this or not, but her mind kept going back to that dungeon she had been forced to run through with Jan and Jasper. Had she been less of a deadweight, they might have gotten out a lot quicker and a lot smoother. The chances of that ever happening again did seem low in her opinion—she didn't expect to be going back to that place again. But she could never be sure. Jan was part of the Immortal Flames. He was on call even now and they could have him going to God knows where and she'd be unable to follow. The thought depressed her. She didn't like the chances of being separated from Jan for an indefinite amount of time. She had decided that she would remedy the situation. She would learn how to defend herself.

The Pugilist Guild that Jan had grown up in was just around the corner. She didn't want to ask Jan to train her for fear of his denial. He'd most certainly try to talk her out of it and she just didn't want to hear it. Besides, she was also doing this for herself. She wanted to be able to defend herself so that she didn't have to depend on Jan so heavily—he did enough for her as it was.

She washed off and put on some form fitting clothes and deemed herself ready. She glanced back over at Jan to see if he was even aware and was satisfied with what she saw. With this, she left the manor as early as possible. She ate another one of Jasper's pastries and was off.

/

Malachi had a plan for today. He had a list of people he was going to piss off today and it was better to start bright and early. After putting on all his armor, he took with him five vials of Hi-potion and two vials of Ether potion. Then he was off to cause trouble just like any other day.

He didn't always know where people would be so he would roam the streets for a while. He'd check in frequented areas like the Adventures Guild and Sapphire Avenue Exchange, but today these places seemed quite abandoned and Malachi was in turn quite disappointed. Just like before, he doubt he was going to get any action today. After a while since it was still early in the day, he simply returned home with hopes dashed.

His mother was up by this time and she knew the expression he wore well and shook her head apologetically.

"Personally, I'm glad you couldn't find anyone today. People move on in this town. Rarely do they stay long," Sarah said slowly weaving a cotton shirt.

"But we've been here our whole lives."

"Correction, _you've_ been here your whole life, but you haven't been around for so long—it's fine," she said with a smile.

"You mean, you didn't always live here?"

"Oh sure I had my house here, but when I was your age, I did get bit by the adventure bug—it's how I met your father."

"Sounds like you really miss those times."

She shook her head slowly, "Not really. Well, maybe sometimes, but it was dangerous business. Fun, but dangerous as hell."

Malachi perked up when she said dangerous. "How dangerous," he asked.

Sarah chuckled. "I knew I'd get your attention. I'd say it was a daily struggle of life and death, but it was quite exhilarating. In fact, I think it'd be right down your alley."

"That's why you said it in the first place, right Mom?"

Sarah smiled. "You got me. You've been so restless as of late. I know you want something more to do—I remember being in your shoes once wondering what I would do next. Always living in the moment. You should go register with the Adventurer's Guild. You pass it every day."

"I pass it every day because you forbade me for getting involved with that stuff."

"I was only looking out for your safety. You were too young before, but now, I think you're ready."

"But Mom, what about you? I don't want to leave you."

"I'll be fine honey. It's you that you should be worried about. Did I mention how dangerous adventuring is? But you're a fine swordsman and you know how to take care of yourself."

"But I'm not sure I want to go by myself. This place is all I've ever known."

"All these buts. You know, I pictured this conversation going a lot differently. If you're afraid to go alone, ask someone else to go with you."

"You know I don't have any friends like that, Mom."

"No, I suppose not," she said with a sigh, "especially since you've made it your life's mission to piss off all the locals."

Malachi looked at her guiltily.

"Wait a minute," she said as something donned on her. "What about those nice men who helped you out last time?"

His face brightened at the mention of them, but then saw a few things missing from that scenario. "I have no idea where they live. Besides, I don't know if they'd agree to doing something like this. They're too—

"Old?" she said with a grin.

Malachi nodded.

"You'd be surprised what people are willing to do. You just have to ask and see what happens. When I saw them that day, I sensed that they too had restless spirits. Maybe you should stop going through that list of yours and start looking for them instead."

"Well, I have nothing better to do."

"That's right. Oh, Malachi, you have no idea how happy I am to hear you doing something mildly productive today. Now get out there while the day is still young."

So Malachi left at the behest of his mother, but he doubted he was simply going to run into either Jasper or Jan that day. He went to the Adventure's Guild first to see if they might be there. It was highly unlikely but worth a try nonetheless. Then he began to look through the main streets and came up empty. At some point, he simply sat down and wondered what exactly they would typically be doing. Jasper was an accomplished Conjurer, but as far as he knew there was no guild that catered to that form of magic around there. Jan, however, seemed more like a local. He practiced Pugilism perhaps he might find him there. It was worth a try anyways.

He continued his trek down Emerald Avenue towards the Pugilist Guild. When he reached it, his nose was hit with a wall of sweat and blood. There were already many people training there. Shouts could be heard throughout. He looked around realizing that he'd never once stepped foot in the place before. He'd never held any interest in pugilism. For as long as he could remember, he always wanted to wield a sword. Now as he looked at the people sparring against each other in the arena, he realized that pugilism was no less glorious than being a gladiator. It was far more personal using one's fists. He found himself mesmerized by the intensity in which they fought. It was the same kind of intensity he'd witnessed in Jan.

Jan wasn't there, but Malachi thought he'd stay a while and watch what was happening. There were those off to the side rooting for one or the other to win the spar. Malachi, on the other hand, was impressed by it all. But one of them did seem to have the upper hand. The sweet pain of fist meeting flesh was enchanting to Malachi.

"Like what you see, son?"

Malachi, startled out of his reverie, turned to the old man who had spoken to him. "Oh, don't mind me, I was only watching."

"But you have the look of a man who's enjoying himself," the old man continued. "I'm Hamon Holyfist, the guildmaster."

"Oh," Malachi said a little caught off guard. He tried to straighten himself up.

The old man laughed. "Relax, kid, you're not on trial. I always have an eye out for new recruits, though."

"No," Malachi said shaking his head. "Maybe later, but I was just looking for someone. Have you seen someone named Jan lately?"

"Jan Saur!" Hamon said loudly, "Now that's a Pugilist for ya! A chip off the ol' block if you ask me. No, I haven't seen him around here lately. He's outgrown this place anyway. Nothing more I can teach him."

Just then a Mi'quote woman stepped in through the front.

"Oh, Hamon! I've done it! I taught those wooden dummies a thing or two about Bootshine."

She was so loud that she was hard to miss. She looked quite lovely with her shimmery dark purple hair and shapely figure. Malachi thought he'd fallen in love instantly, but she paid him no mind as she approached Hamon and further discussed her recent accomplishments. Her voice was silky smooth like butter and he couldn't take her eyes off of her. He felt privileged to be standing so close to such a lovely woman. Needless to say, he hadn't been following their conversation so when Hamon turned to him and asked if he might accompany her on her next task, he was completely at a loss of words.

"Now don't be shy, son—Usually, I like my pugilists to go it alone, but she's a special case. I'll have to put her on weight training after this. I just need someone to make sure everything goes fine," Hamon said to Malachi.

"I _don't_ need a babysitter," Dinah argued back to the old man. "I can take care of myself."

"_Eventually_, you'll be able to take care of yourself. Now trust me, you'll need someone to have your back for the time being—who better than an idle gladiator," Hamon said turning to Malachi.

"I'd love to help out," Malachi said finally. "Really, it's no problem."

Dinah turned to the youth and gave him a murderous look and he shrank back. He wondered if he'd managed to say the wrong thing.

"Alright then, it's settled. Now it's time to practice on your combos. Don't get carried away—I just need you try it out on a few Qiqirn shellsweepers. They're an agile bunch. If you can pull it off right on them, then you're all set for the time being."

Dinah sighed exasperatedly, "Alright, my ever wise guildmaster. C'mon, kid, before I leave you behind."

She'd already turned from Hamon and was on her way out of the Platinum Mirage. Malachi had to run to catch up.

"So what's your name, kid?"

"Malachi," he said immediately. He already found himself blushing.

She grinned at this. "Dinah. You know, you remind me of someone."

"I hope that's a good thing."

"Oh, it's a very good thing. I like him a lot."

The two of them made their way out into the desert and took their time looking around for the right target. Neither of them had mounts so it took them longer than usual and quite a bit of sprinting. By the time they found the Qiqirins, Dinah found that she was a bit out of breath and had to wait before she actually attacked.

"I'm such a newb," she complained. "Who tires themselves out _before_ they get to their targets? I bet Jan never has to deal with this kind of stuff."

"We all have to start somewhere," Malachi said, but then he paused when his mind caught on to something she had just said. "Wait a minute, who's Jan?"

She smiled at him. "Sorry, kid, he's my boyfriend and a damn good one."

"He wouldn't happen to be friends with an Elezen named Jasper, would he?"

"Yeah," she said a little surprised. "How'd you know that?"

"Well, small world. I was looking for Jan, but I had no idea how to find him."

"What you needed to ask him?"

Malachi then sat down beside her. "I don't know—it was something stupid anyway. I mean, he'd never agree to it—he has you to worry about."

"Will you stop speaking in riddles?"

"I was thinking about…registering at the adventurer's guild, but I wanted someone to do it with me."

"You mean you want to ask Jan to go adventuring with you?"

Malachi nodded.

Dinah smiled at this. "Something tells me he'd jump at the chance."

"Really? But what about you?"

"What about me? Well, I'd come with you guys, of course! Why do you think I'm learning pugilism?"

"You were bored?"

"I want to learn how to protect myself. And this would be a good reason to learn how. In fact, I think this is a _great_ idea, Malachi. Jan, he's been a bit distant as of late, restless even."

"Oh, has he?" Malachi said trying to sound genuinely surprised. But in the back of his mind, he thought of the conversation he had had with Jan all those nights before.

Jan hadn't told him everything. Malachi had no idea that he was already dating someone else while still harboring feelings for his best friend. The plot thickened a little too quickly for Malachi and he wondered if he should be getting involved with them. The situation didn't exactly feel ideal.

"Yeah," she said with a sigh, "But I guess I shouldn't be sharing my problems with you like this. I don't think staying in one place for a long period of time is something Jan is used to. I think this would be a great distraction for him. And maybe…Well, nevermind. I'll take you to him once we're finished with these Qiqirins."

"Alright, sounds like a plan," Malachi replied almost thoughtfully. Jan had a lot of explaining to do if he was going to consider asking him to accompany him.

/

Malachi walked with Dinah back to Jasper's place. He was amazed at how big his residence was. It seemed the Elezen was quite rich, though it was odd for him to have such a large house and so few occupants. Dinah had already informed him that he was very single and rather liked it that way. Malachi shook his head at all the irony. Trouble was brewing, he could tell and once again he wondered if he should get himself involved…

"Jan!" Dinah yelled out loud and clear. "Malachi's here to see you!"

It wasn't customary to yell all through the house, but it got the job done. Jan came sauntering downstairs having obviously just showered.

"Malachi," Jan said invitingly upon seeing him. He hadn't skipped a beat. Didn't even blink twice seeing Malachi with Dinah and knowing that Malachi must have known something was up. "Fancy seeing you today. Staying out of trouble, I hope."

"I try," Malachi said with a shrug. "Sometimes it's unavoidable."

"Now Malachi has something to ask you," Dinah said chiming in on their conversation.

"I do…but I'd like to speak with Jan alone. If you don't mind," Jan said looking at Dinah.

"Fine," she said with a sigh. "If you need me, I'll be out in the back weight training."

"Weight train—" Jan began with a perplexed expression but was stopped by Dinah's not-now look.

She left in a hurry obviously anxious to get on with her training. Jan watched her the entire way and might have considered following had Malachi not stopped him.

"We need to talk," he said getting the other's attention.

"Malachi, do you have any idea what she's doing?"

"She didn't tell you? She's training to be a Pugilist—like you."

"Well then, why didn't she ask me to help?" He was clearly perplexed. "And why now all of sudden?"

Malachi shrugged not wanting to say anything about it.

"Alright," he said turning to Malachi. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Isn't it obvious?" he asked looking at the other evenly.

"Let's sit," he said avoiding the other's gaze.

They took a seat in the living room.

"On second thought, let's take a seat in the guest room," Jan said looking around the openness of the living room and the thought of Jasper's sharp ears.

Jan only let his guard down when he was able to close and lock the door. He hadn't even turned back to look at the boy.

"I was looking for you at the Pugilist guild—I had no idea how to find you. That's how I ran into your supposed girlfriend. She _is_ your girlfriend, right?"

"Yes," he said still not willing to look at the other.

"And you haven't told her, have you?"

"No," he said steadily. "And I don't plan to." Then he turned to Malachi. "And I swear to God if _you_ tell her, you'll be more than bruised up when I'm finished with you."

"Jesus, Jan, is that a death threat?"

"I thought you'd get excited about it seeing as you like pain so much."

"Jan, you have to make a choice, right here, right now. Jasper or Dinah," Malachi continued unperturbed.

"I don't _have_ to do anything, boy," Jan said finally taking a seat. "I can't just…turn off my feelings for someone even if I know that it'll never be reciprocated."

"You have no idea how Jasper would react."

"Oh, but I do. I've been thinking about this. I don't think I'd _want_ to be in a relationship with Jasper even it were possible. The thought of having relations with another man disgusts me."

"_Disgusts_ you? Then why in the world do you even have feelings for him."

"I fell in love with the thought of him of always having him around. I could kiss him, I'd be fine. I could make love to him and I'd be fine, but anything further," his face scrunched up at the thought. "Anything further and I wouldn't be. I just wish that he had been born a woman and not a man. Malachi, the point is, it wouldn't work with him. It wouldn't be fulfilling."

"Then the decision is easy."

"I've already made that decision."

"You told me before that you had feelings for Jasper, but what about Dinah? Do you even like her?"

"Of course I do. I love her."

Malachi looked at him with an unconvinced expression. "Is that a fact?"

"It is or else I wouldn't have said it."

Malachi shook his head. "I guess I'll just have to take your word for it. If you want to pretend like everything's alright, then I suppose I can go with the flow."

"What is this? A therapy session? I love Dinah. I'm glad that she sees something in me worth loving. She's been through a lot and I just want to protect her even from me. I want to support her in everything she does. I want to be responsible for her happiness."

"That sounds more like obligations than love."

"They're one in the same, kid. You're too young to understand."

"Oh, don't play that card with me. I think I'm quite mature for my age."

"Going out to get yourself drunk after not finding a good fight is _not_ mature. And I'm pretty sure that wasn't the first time you did that kind of thing. Pissing people off for the heck of it is the least mature thing a kid your age could do. I can 'play' that card whenever I like."

"You don't even know me and you're trying to lecture _me_ about maturity. You just won't drop it, will ya? I told you—that's just what I like. I like pain."

"Malachi, you do know that's not normal."

Malachi stood up. "I'm no fool. I know that. I told you that because I thought I could trust you."

"You can trust me," Jan said with a sigh. "But look at where we are. You're sitting there, well, I guess standing now, telling me about my love life. These are things that you can't help me with—I have to deal with it myself."

"If you could really deal with it on your own, you wouldn't have needed to beat the tar out of me last time, you wouldn't have needed to talk to me in the first place. You want a second opinion and I'm giving it to you, like it or not. You can't just pretend to not like someone anymore just because you think such feelings would lead to nothing. You have to confront them, you have to tell Jasper—you can't just hope they vanish into thin air."

"I told you before—he would not understand. I don't want to lose my friendship with him over something as stupid as this."

"Why do you think your feelings are stupid? Unworthy of being shared. Maybe you're just like me. Maybe you think pain is alright and you're fine with bearing it all."

"What pain? There is no pain. There are just some things that are better left unsaid. I don't plan on ever disclosing such information to Jasper and that's the end of it."

"Meanwhile, you pretend like you love Dinah 100%."

"I do."

"Well, you're doing a poor job at showing it. Just today she was talking about how distant you were."

"She did? What else did she say?" Jan said suddenly interested.

"Just that she thought you were restless—not used to staying in one spot for long."

"Maybe she's right."

"You know she isn't. How could she? She doesn't even know the full story."

"I'm getting tired of discussing this with you," Jan said with a heavy sigh. "You wanted to ask me something. Get on with it already."

"I came home today and Mom suggested that I do something interesting with my life. It was another day where I couldn't find anyone to piss off—and I was depressed. Oh, don't give me that look."

"What you do? Drink yourself into a stupor?"

"I'm not a damn drunk or anything. I don't do that every time."

"Just most of the time."

"Whatever," Malachi said exasperatedly. "Mom suggested that I register with the Adventurer's Guild, but I told her I had no interest in adventuring on my own. I wanted someone to do it with me."

"And you thought of me."

Malachi nodded.

"I…don't know if that would be a good idea for me. I mean, what about Dinah?"

"She told me you'd jump at the chance. She completely supported me."

"Really?" Jan asked surprised.

"Yeah."

"But I can't just leave. I have her to take care of."

"She'd want to come with you obviously."

Jan was having problems picturing the scenario. "Come…with me? Dinah? She barely wants to walk down the street let alone traveling for long distance."

"Trust me. She seemed pretty excited about the prospects."

"And Jasper…"

"What about him?"

"I can't just abandon him."

"Jan, do you hear yourself right now? Jasper is a grown man with the means to support himself quite easily. You're in excess of really."

"But what will he do on his own? No, hear me out," Jan said as Malachi gave him an annoyed look. "It isn't safe for him to be left alone like that. You've seen him for yourself. If no one pushes him to do anything, he won't. He's content to stay locked away in some small room with his damn books and be done with life altogether. I can't let him do that."

"You can't solve everyone's problems."

"I don't plan to. Jasper is my friend, I can't let him self-destruct."

"So you want to take him with you."

Jan nodded.

"And once again he's still in your orbit."

"Malachi, it isn't even about that. To hell with my feelings for him. I'd be less than a friend if I simply let things go as they are."

"You're the one who wants to make this hard on yourself."

"It isn't about me."

"Yes it is. I'm asking _you_ if you want to accompany me and you're the only one who would want to bring Jasper along."

"And how do you know Dinah wouldn't agree with me?"

"I doubt it. She didn't even mention the guy's name when I suggested the whole idea."

"And what do you think, Malachi? Do you think it wise to leave behind such an accomplished healer?"

"I can do without healers. They take away the pain that I love so much."

Jan shook his head. "You know what? Your opinion doesn't count."

"What?" Malachi said surprised.

"That was the craziest thing I've heard you say yet. Don't bring the healer because he takes away pain? Are you serious? We're liable to die out there, Malachi. Are you really willing to take that risk?"

"I don't plan on dying."

"Good. Then if I'm to accompany you, I'm bringing Jasper—

"If he even agrees, that stiff."

"Yes, if he agrees and he will. And Dinah will come with me."

"So everyone's coming. I wasn't expecting so many people."

"It's only four people, Malachi. Barely enough to get by."

"Alright, but nothing's set in stone. We have to make sure everyone's on the same page."

"Way ahead of you, son."

"And don't call me son."

"Well, sorry," Jan replied a little put off.

"No, it's not you…It's just…Well, I'm not your son and I don't want anyone to get confused."

"Say no more, _kid_."

/

Jasper tossed and turned in his bed. Flashes of moments he could not recall came back to him in an undecipherable speed. All of it, however, had to do with Jan. He found peace later on in the night, but he remained disturbed by what he had seen or thought he saw. When morning came, he found he had no desire to get up. Of course, there was always thaumaturgy, but he wasn't in the mood right then. In his solitude, he thought of what his future might hold or if it even held anything at all. Maybe he should stop living right now. Then again, suicide went against everything he stood for. Not that he was seriously thinking about it. However, it had become a reoccurring theme when his thoughts became idle. It didn't scare him in the least. He supposed it was natural. Having nothing to look forward to in life was a depressing thing for a living creature.

He thought of Malachi's mother and her crooked leg. He thought of how he could probably fix her with a bit of work if she was willing. Not only did he think of her leg, he thought of her in general—the only other woman he'd made contact with for weeks. He used to think of himself as a loner, but he found lately that he disliked being alone for so long. He found that he craved intimacy more than anything else. The strip club would probably be the highlight of the year. Naked woman of any kind never ceased to interest him. Being a healer had often given him a good excuse to see bare woman and many times in the past he had abused such authority, at least in the sense that he saw far more naked women than what was proper for a healer at his caliber. He felt no remorse for such things. He simply wanted what he wanted.

Then his thoughts returned to Sarah—an older lady, who was more than a bit overweight. That didn't really deter him. She was still a woman and so still alluring in his eyes. She'd seemed lonely as well. Her house looked extremely tidy, far more tidy than his own and the place had a very homely feel. She must have spent most of her time at the house always worrying about her obnoxious or perhaps even insane son. He'd clearly sensed the built up stress within her—a typical condition of a caring mother. She probably looked more aged than she should as she had to take care of a child all on her own and who knew the circumstances as to why the father was not around.

Jasper turned on his side and stared idly at his sheets. He probably needed to wash those, but he certainly didn't feel like doing that today. No, there was only one thing he felt like doing today and it was not tagging along with Jan to whatever he liked to do. When he finally got out of bed that day, half the day had already passed by, but it was all very well for him. At least he didn't have to worry about coming over to someone's house too early.

He took a very thorough shower and used soap that he thought gave him a nice subtle scent without being too overpowering. He trimmed his facial hair a bit with his electric razor so that it could look nice and shaped up. He brushed his hair a bit more than usual and used a different band to tie back his hair. Checking himself in the mirror seeing if it looked like he was trying too hard, he was quite satisfied with what he saw.

He walked downstairs and was met with no one so he simply left the house and traversed over to Sarah's. He took his time. It was a nice day after all. He was coming up on the Pugilist Guild and noted Dinah and Malachi walking out of it together. That was a puzzling matter in itself, but he had no motivation as to figuring out what it was. He wondered if Jan had anything to do with it, but he soon shook his head and kept his distance. He knew Dinah to be the kind of girl who did exactly what she wanted to do and if that was the case more power to her. At least Malachi would be keeping her safe—however safe a wayward teen could keep someone. At the very least, he knew that Malachi was out of the house which was a plus. Jasper figured that he would be so he was not surprised.

He knocked on the door when he arrived and waited patiently for Sarah to open the door. She did so after a bit of waiting. He knew it must have been a bit of hard work making her way to the door with her leg. She opened the door and was quite surprised to see him.

"Oh, Jasper! What a pleasant surprise. What brings you here today? Did my son get into more trouble?"

"Well, I certainly hope not. I came here for you, Sarah, if you don't mind. I just thought that you might want the company."

"Of course, I want the company. Come on in," she said stepping aside and letting him enter. "Take a seat in the living room with me."

He entered the living room waiting for her to take a seat first. She locked the door and limped her way over. He noted where she sat and then took one right next to her. If she was a bit surprised by this, she didn't show it on her face.

"So what are you knitting today?" Jasper asked noticing that she was well into a knitting project of hers, but he couldn't tell what it was.

"Oh, just a scarf for Malachi. You know, it gets cold in Ul'dah sometimes too."

Jasper grinned at this. "You really think so? Cold feels like springtime here."

"I guess you're not from around here then."

"I've lived here long enough, I suppose."

"I've lived here for most of my life."

"Most?" he asked curiously.

"There was a time when I traveled. I met my husband that way."

"He was a drifter, then."

"He was, but I tamed him, I think."

"Quite a feat."

"Yes, it is one of my crowning moments," she said with a grin. "He stayed with me here in Ul'dah for a good while. We had a child. We were a proper family."

"Sounds like it."

"Yes. But things came up."

"Like?"

"Well, I didn't really know him as well as I thought."

"He left you in the end."

"Not quite like that. There was something wrong with him, something psychologically wrong with him and I didn't discover it until much later—he did a great job at hiding it from me." Then she sighed. "I have no idea why I'm telling you this."

"Perhaps you just want someone to talk to."

Sarah looked back to her knitting. "He liked to hurt himself—he was quite self-destructive. You try to compliment him on something and he doesn't believe you. He sets himself up for failure. It's like he gets joy for being the bane of his own existence. But I loved him, you see, and I was willing to work with him. He just wouldn't _believe_ me. He told me time and again that there was no such woman who would really want to keep him in their life. I begged to differ. I mean, I really begged."

"Then what happened?" Jasper asked when she didn't continue immediately.

"He grew to resent me because I loved him. When something becomes too good, he runs from it or tries to destroy it. I didn't quite understand. One day, he got himself really drunk and left the protection of the city walls. He engaged in battle with wild creatures outside and couldn't defend himself. He wanted to feel the pain, of course, but I'm sure he didn't want to die. He did, though. That was the consequences of his actions and there was nothing I could have done for it."

"And Malachi knows about all of this?"

She shook her head. "I couldn't tell him. He's so much like him already, they even look similar. I want to believe that my son will turn out differently. I tried not to love him too much. I never try to keep him in the house. I allow him his pain and don't make too much fuss about it—I try to at least. Maybe he won't be so destructive."

"That must be really hard for you. Wanting to help your son, but not being able to. That would drive me insane as a healer."

"You know, Conjurers have always fascinated me. I told you a little about myself. Tell me about you."

"What would you like to know?"

"Any past relationships? Any children of your own?"

Jasper smiled at the old lady. "No children of my own. I never planned on having any."

"None? But why?"

"I couldn't see myself as a father and especially not a good one. I wouldn't know the first thing."

"No one does at first. You just go with your gut feeling when you're raising a child."

"That sounds scary. There's always been a rulebook for me. My life, for the most part, has always been mapped out for me. In the beginning, at least."

"And what made you want to do Conjury?"

"To end other people's suffering. It's a bold claim, I know, but I've always been acutely aware of someone else's pain. My mother was always in an abusive relationship with my father. For as long as I can remember, it's always been that way. I never liked seeing her in pain and I always felt like there was something more I could be doing. It's silly, but sometimes I blamed myself for not being able to fix things. I left them because I didn't want to continue staring my failure in the face."

"So you learned how to heal people for your mother's sake?"

"It was all for her yet I was unable to really help her. I could only heal the surface wounds. She still remains with him. She still doesn't think she deserves anything better. Ever since then, I've been afraid."

"For her?"

He shook his head. "For me. I don't want to be responsible for another woman's sorrow."

"Jasper, you can't be afraid to take chances. You'll sit around long enough and waste your entire life having done nothing with it."

"Perhaps you're right."

"I know I'm right. You seem like a really nice guy. And let me just say this, just in case you don't know—nowhere is it written that you have to turn out just like your father."

"That's ironic coming from you. Considering Malachi."

"He's already so much more different than his father. He's able to love others. I know that he loves me and he's quite fond of Jan—he won't shut-up about him."

"Well, they're pretty similar. They both enjoy a good fight."

"See what I mean? He can enjoy himself and with other people."

"I see your point now."

"Promise me you'll do something for yourself."

"I don't like making promises I'm not certain I can keep."

"Take a chance, Jasper."

"I'll try."

"That's all I wanted to hear."

"But there's something more pressing I wanted to ask you about."

"I'm all ears."

"How did you break your leg?"

She was caught off guard by his question and looked down consciously at her twisted leg. "I…well, I fell."

"Is that all you want to tell me?"

"That's all I'm willing to tell you."

"That's fine. You fell probably from some high place and broke your leg."

She nodded.

"And you didn't get it seen by a proper healer."

"They're far too costly, Jasper."

"May I?" Jasper asked indicating that he wanted to examine her leg more closely.

She allowed him to lift her leg and winced as he moved it to his lap. She had to turn herself on the couch so that she could get comfortable.

"It's been like that forever. I don't think anyone can fix it."

"Well, I'm not anyone."

She blushed when he ran his hand down the length of it. "Did you…find anything?"

"Oh, it's fixable, but it requires a lot of pain. I'd have to break your leg once again and then make sure it heals correctly."

Sarah looked at him with a horrified expression. "I don't know if I can go through with that."

Jasper grinned at her. "You should see your face—priceless. That's how your run of the mill healer might have to do it, but I promise that I can fix your leg without having to feel even the slightest pain."

Sarah looked at him, "Stop lying," she said jokingly.

"I'm not."

Then it donned on her that he was being completely serious. "You can really do this?"

"Yes I can."

"But I won't be able to pay you back."

"You know I don't require money for my services."

"Oh, bless you. But I can't let you do this for free. I have to repay you somehow."

"Well, since you're so insistent, I do know of a way you could repay me."

Sarah looked at him curiously, but he didn't expound. His eyes weren't on her anymore. Suddenly, her entire right leg fell asleep as if she'd been sitting on it for too long and she couldn't feel anything of what he did next. She heard her bones crack and she jolted back in fear, but still felt nothing. She calmed herself when he gave her a warning look to stay still. And then, after only a few seconds, the feeling came back in to her leg and it was as if nothing had happened. She looked at her leg and didn't know what to expect.

"Try to stand," he suggested when he saw her confused expression.

Slowly, cautiously, she placed her foot on the ground and then pressed more and more weight on it until she was standing tall.

"Now walk," he said gently.

And she did so and then almost stumbled to the ground before he caught her.

"I…I can't believe it…I expected to…I can walk normally now. Oh, it's been so long!"

She pulled away from him again and tried to walk and managed a few steps of her own. She turned to him and without a second thought kissed him chiefly on the lips. She was clearly excited.

"Now, about your repayment," he said with a grin.

And she did not complain as he pulled her closer and kissed her deeply. Before they knew it, they were falling on the couch kissing each other as if the world was going to end any second, but then Sarah stopped him.

"We can't do this out here. Malachi. Let's go to my room."

It was a difficult task, but they eventually managed to get to her room and as soon as they reached the bed, Jasper began making love to her gently and carefully.

"You smell nice today," Sarah said almost breathless.

"As do you," he replied, his voice low and sensual now.

"Lies, Elezen. I put nothing on today."

"But I can clearly smell the soap. Even the no-scent ones have scent."

"You must be…really sensitive to smell." Her body shivered pleasantly as he kissed her on her stomach.

She couldn't remember the last time anyone had done as much to her.

"What, are you in to old ladies?" she sighed.

"I'm into you. Has anyone told you how beautiful you are, lately?"

Sarah laughed at this, but she was blushing. "Not in a long time. Besides, I'm not."

"Well, that's in the eye of the beholder, isn't it?"

Eventually, when he thought she was good and ready, he slid his anxious cock into her and she moaned with obvious pleasure and they fucked each other well into the night. Jasper wore her out well past her limit, but she was only too eager to acquiesce his demands. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so invigorated by a man or spent so much of her energy on vigorous activity. She was only happy that he was satisfied. Even though she was tired, she watched him sleep for a while and she ran her fingers through his soft hair. Why such a fit and handsome man would want to do an old lady like her was beyond her comprehension. He didn't seem to mind anything about her and it made her feel beautiful far more than any of his words could. She touched the wrinkles on her face and found that she loved those too. Even her fatness she fell in love with at least for this night.

/

The next morning, she thought last night had surely been a figment of her imagination. Jasper hadn't really come over that night and he hadn't really fixed her limp that she'd had for more than twenty years. He didn't then ask for repayment in sex. But she looked over and saw that he was still there, sleeping rather peacefully. She looked at the time and saw that it was late morning. She was used to waking up so much more earlier. Then she heard a knock on her door.

"Mom! I need to talk to you!" Malachi said through the door.

Shocked, she then began to shake Jasper to wakefulness which was a task in itself. He might have been dead if he hadn't been breathing. His eyes opened slowly and he began to say something when he saw her face but she quickly pressed her hand firmly against his mouth. She indicated the door to the half-understanding Jasper. Then he nodded with partial understanding.

"Mom! Are you there?"

"I'll be out in a bit, Malachi. Go wait for me in the living room." Then she leaned in closely to Jasper and whispered in his ear. "I'll be back in a few. Stay here and be quiet."

Jasper watched with cloudy eyes as she left and closed the door behind her. After a moment, he sat up in his bed and then walked over to the door to hear what was being said. He listened for a while and then walked back over to the bed and waited for her return. He heard her quiet footsteps and then watched as the door was opened and closed it behind her.

"I think it'd be best if I leave," Jasper said upon her reappearance.

"I agree. Just make sure you're quiet."

"Don't worry about me."

Malachi had gone to his room again from what he had heard. Jasper gave Sarah a quick kiss on her forehead and then made his way quickly out. It was a cool morning he noted as he made his way unhurriedly to his home. The house was quiet when he stepped in, but he didn't get far before he was stopped by Jan.

"Where have you been? I've been looking for you since yesterday. Turned off your linkshell and everything."

"I had reason to."

"Jasper, what in the world—

"It's personal. Now I'm going to take a shower."

"Alright, but there's something I want to talk to you about."

"I think I already know what that is."

Jasper didn't leave the other any time to respond as he climbed the steps to the bathroom. He took his sweet time. He really did know what Jan was going to ask him and he took the time to think on it. He'd heard Malachi's candid conversation with his mother. It seemed he was planning on registering with the Adventurer's Guild and Jan was interested in joining him in his journeying. Jasper couldn't imagine that Jan would even think of undertaking such a venture without first asking him to join. He wondered if he should join, but he knew what his answer would be when he thought of Jan out there by himself constantly in the jaws of danger. Besides, he had nothing better to do. Just yesterday morning he was lamenting how lacking his future was, pondering suicide even. He really had no reason to deny Jan if he asked. Finally decided, he turned off the shower, dried himself off and eventually met back up with Jan downstairs.

"My answer is yes," Jasper said upon seeing Jan.

"But you don't even know what I'm asking."

Jasper smiled. "I'll go with you on your silly adventures. Someone has to make sure we all survive."

Jan took a long look at the other trying to figure out how he could have known, but then gave up on it when he realized that Jasper was not going to explain himself any further. "Well, that's good—least I didn't have to convince you of anything. Dinah's coming with us."

"Just bring everyone then. It'll be like a big family vacation," Jasper said with obvious sarcasm.

Jan looked at him annoyed. "That's just how it worked out. And if you haven't noticed—we make a very convenient party."

"You know what they say, Jan. We're only as strong as our weakest link."

"And who exactly are you calling weakest link?"

"Oh, don't play dumb, Jan. Your girlfriend, of course. You can't spend two days training as a Pugilist and then actually be ready for the world."

"Wait, how do you know—

"I just know things, Jan."

"Yeah, I guess you do."

Just then there was a knock on the door and Jan did not hesitate to answer it despite it being Jasper's place.

"Malachi! Glad you came, come in."

The blond teen walked in and his attention turned to Jasper as soon as he saw him. "Guess I was wrong about you, Jasper. Thanks for helping my mom out—she's like a new woman."

"She should be," Jasper said with a grin.

But Jan knew that look well and he gave his friend a knowing look shaking his head. Luckily, Malachi wasn't turned to him so he couldn't see as he mouthed the words: "You made out with her?"

Jasper was amused with the expression on Jan's face and then despite himself gave him a barely perceptible nod. Jan's look was quite priceless.

"So, I take it Jan told you about what I plan on doing," Malachi continued completely oblivious to the silent exchange between Jasper and Jan.

"He did. I've decided I'll join you two or more like you three. It's dangerous out there—it'd be suicide to go without a healer."

"Good," Malachi said satisfied with the other's answer. "So where's Dinah?"

Malachi turned to Jan then who was only given a second to fix his expression to a more neutral one. "Oh, Dinah? She's out back weight training."

"Are you sure we should take her with us?" Malachi asked Jan.

"She won't stay here alone," Jan returned.

Then he walked off to go find her, leaving Jasper and Malachi behind.

"You know, I resent healers," Malachi said to Jasper.

"I imagine you would."

"But…I'm really thankful for you. I've never seen Mom so happy, so full of energy. I mean, all of that from just fixing a limp. I bet it must have hurt."

"Oh, no, it was quite painless. Of course, were it you, I probably wouldn't have been so conscientious."

"Look, let me make one thing clear. Don't heal me all the way, alright. I…Well, I like to feel _some_ kind of pain just so I know I'm doing something right."

"We all know the real reason, Malachi, and you're not the first I've dealt with, with your 'unique' sentiments."

"Really?"

"But let me make this clear to you, boy. I will heal you as I heal anyone else—I will not make any exceptions. You'll just have to get used to it or kill me right now."

Malachi frowned deeply at the other. "You know I considered the alternative, but I'm sure Jan would be none too happy."

"You couldn't lay a hand on me even if you tried your utmost. Like I said, I've dealt with the likes of you before. I can defend myself just as well. Eventually, Malachi, you'll understand the wisdom of my stance. Until then, you'll just have to suffer through."

/

AN: And the initial party has formed! Doesn't it look like one happy family?

Tried to get to my usual 10,000 word count, but didn't quite make it. Just thought the ending would be far more intriguing if I left it here.

Stay tuned!


	6. Chapter 6

Jasper Bloodstone & Jan Saur in Eorzea

Chapter 6

It turned out only Dinah and Malachi weren't actual registered adventurers so they made a trip to the Adventurer's Guild and wrote down their names in the registry there. It was a momentous occasion at least to them. They were taking their first steps to a life they knew absolutely nothing about. As Momodi went over the usual guidelines she gave to first timers, Malachi became increasingly appreciative of Jan and Jasper's involvement. It all seemed nearly overwhelming. At least they were starting out small. They were told to introduce themselves to a local guild, attune oneself with the aetheryte inside the city, and talk to someone named Seseroga about the market. Introducing oneself to a guild seemed a bit pointless since they had already chosen which one they would pursue and knew their guildmasters quite well. The aetheryte part was an experience, however. For as long as Malachi had lived in Ul'dah, he had never paid much attention to the aetherytes in the city. He'd always thought how beautiful they looked, but never had he suspected that they could be used for teleportation. Dinah knew better. She'd seen people use it all the time. So for the majority of the first day as adventurers, they raced each other through the large city-state. There was no map as to where each aetheryte was or even how many there were so it was basically like an egg hunt.

They eventually met back up at the agreed upon spot on the steps outside of the Adventurer's Guild. Needless to say, Dinah was quite spent, but so was Malachi who was so direction challenged that he continually returned to the same spots he'd already visited before.

"You know, she did say we had to get acquainted with the city more," Malachi said through breaths.

"Yeah, but this is insane. I can't even imagine Jan doing this and certainly not Jasper," Dinah said gulping greedily at the air around her.

"Hey, everyone's young at some point in their lives."

Dinah giggled and then laughed despite not having much breath for such things. She had to wait a moment before she could say anything. "But Jasper was never young! How much you wanna bet when it came to the menial tasks, Jasper had Jan do it for him?"

"I wouldn't put it past him actually," Malachi agreed.

"C'mon, let's report back to Momodi."

"Be my guest."

Malachi paused as he watched her climb the steps. She was really quite sensual starting from the way she looked to the way she carried herself—even her walk was a turn on. He shook his head. She managed to fall in love with a man who probably couldn't see her the way he was able to. When she was almost to the top of the steps he ran after her and they entered the guild together. She was in a good mood so he was in turn.

Momodi was a cheerful woman and was quite delighted to see that they had fulfilled their tasks adequately enough.

"Now, it's getting late, boys and girls. Better that you come back here tomorrow when you're refreshed," Momodi told them after her longwinded explanation as to why attuning with aetherytes were essential for any adventurer and learning about the shops would help them later on down the road.

They took their leave presently feeling quite accomplished—they felt they had gained significant experience that day.

"Let's celebrate somewhere," Malachi said as they walked outside into the cooling air.

"Oh, I would, but I'm not a boundless ball of energy like you are. Think I just want to go back home to Jan and tell him how today went—I'm sure he's anxious to know."

"How anxious could he be? He didn't even come with you today."

"Malachi, that was rude," Dinah said with a frown. "I didn't expect him to come today—I told him not to. I _know_ he's done all this stuff before so I didn't want to bore him to death with the minutia of things."

"Right, well, I guess I'll go home as well," Malachi said turning. "It's no fun celebrating on your own."

"Wait, Malachi, if you want, you can come back home with me—Jasper wouldn't mind. Or if he does he'll have to deal with my wrath. It's not like we don't have enough room."

Malachi stopped and looked at her thoughtfully, but then shook his head no.

"Your mother doesn't expect you home, you know. When she told you to go adventuring, she knew that eventuality. Besides, we're all going to be traveling together eventually. We should get to know each other better."

"Fine, if you insist," he said finally. "But it's not like I don't already know enough about you guys."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"Meaning, I'm a pretty observing guy—you should be too."

Dinah shook her head and rolled her eyes. "I'm only as observing as I want to be. I've learned in life, sometimes you can just know too much. Better to enjoy things as long as you possibly can. Now c'mon, Malachi!"

Dinah was quite a joy to be around. Malachi tried but failed to remain in his bad mood, not when he could witness Dinah's genuine smile up close. It saddened him a bit that one day, she wouldn't be smiling anymore. When it came to hidden feelings, eventually they would come to light. He braced himself for that day.

When they came back to the house, Dinah gathered the two older men from whatever they were doing so that they might have an excuse to all be in the same room.

"I was hoping you two would regale us with stories about your early adventuring days," Dinah said sitting back on the couch.

Malachi glanced over at Dinah who sat very closely to Jan, but then turned his head from the scene as she leaned her head on his shoulder. _That bastard…_someone's _going to find out even if I don't say anything._ Instead, he sought solace in Jasper who sat on his own couch with crossed legs, sipping what smelled like grass tea. Jasper grinned at him when he saw him watching, but it was an unsettling kind of grin as if he had the upper hand in something.

"Jasper, why don't you start?" Jan asked the other.

"Well, weren't you guys together back then," Dinah asked.

Jan shook his head, "Not at all. At least for me, I did most things on my own."

"As did I," Jasper said.

"And you had to run around attuning yourself with the aetherytes too," Dinah said clearly amused at seeing Jasper doing such a thing.

"I didn't run per se," Jasper said slowly. "I took a map with me and meticulously searched every inch of Gridania, the old parts and the new parts, and marked each one I found. That way, if I used them for teleportation, I'd know where I was being teleported to. It did take me the better part of the day to do it. I admit, I did get sidetracked with the Conjurer's Guild. Didn't actually go back to report my progress until a few days later."

"That actually sounds…pretty sensible," Dinah said with a nod.

"I took a map as well," Jan began. "I remember not feeling like doing any of it and being constantly sidetracked by—well, I was constantly sidetracked."

"Oh, don't be shy, we all know you were quite the lady's man back then," Dinah said with a mischievous grin.

"I'd have to agree," Jasper said smiling.

"Alright, you caught me red handed."

"See, Jan, I can tell these things pretty easily."

"At least," Malachi said in low tones and received a playful shove from Dinah. "So how long did it take you, Jan?"

"Oh, about a week or so."

"A week? Jesus, man," Malachi said surprised.

"Don't tell me you guys weren't sidetracked as well. As soon as you even _look_ like an adventurer, everyone always have something for you to do. I was picking up dropped money, running around trying to put up stupid posters, asking people what colors they liked—just any insanely pointless task you can think of. And who was I to say no? I tired myself out pretty easily that way."

Thinking better of what exactly Jan had been doing back then, he nodded. "Yeah, but Dinah and I weren't suckers. We got it all done today."

"Ay, that's really quite an achievement. I did get sidetracked pretty easily and perhaps I didn't have to do everything, but I felt really accomplished at the end of the day—I really felt like I was making a difference in someone else's life no matter how small that difference might be," Jan said.

"Isn't that the point of adventuring?" Jasper said. "We're the idiots who stick our necks out for anyone with the hope that perhaps we can make a difference."

"You guys!" Dinah said looking from Jan to Jasper, "You're making me feel pretty _un_accomplished today. I was so focused on getting those aetherytes. I never stopped to think about anything or anyone else."

"Hey, this was just your first day," Jan said in coaxing tones, "There's always another day."

"Correction, there's _usually_ another day," Jasper said darkly. But then he stood up. "Think I'll head off to bed for now. And Malachi," Jasper began turning to the youth. "Stay here if you like. There's plenty of well-furnished spare rooms."

Malachi nodded to him silently and watched the tall Elezen exit the living room. Eventually, Jan and Dinah left as well as they became increasingly entangled with one another. Malachi hated to admit it, but it did seem that Jan was genuinely interested in Dinah. Still, Jan struck him as a person who could put up a good act. Malachi hadn't so much as caught Jan's gaze that day. He was jealous, he realized. He wondered how in the world a man could attain such a beautiful woman. Jan made it look effortless, but Malachi knew from firsthand experience that women were flighty creatures, not one of them understanding the real meaning of being in a relationship. Perhaps Jasper shared his sentiment, but he couldn't stand being around the man, the one who had threatened to take away all the physical pain in his life.

Slightly put off by the situation, he slinked off to any random room he could find. He could at least look forward to the next day. Momodi seemed to be full of activities for them to do. It would be a nice distraction.

/

Dinah and Malachi were told to speak with Papashan at the Ul'dah Dispatch Yard. Malachi had jumped at the chance to leave the safety of the city walls. Dinah lamented the fact that they had to go so far just to meet the man.

"Dinah, you're always complaining about walking any long distance," Malachi said as they stepped out into the desert.

"That's because when I want to walk, you're jogging."

"Sorry, I get anxious sometimes, but I'll slow down for you."

"You won't think I'm annoying and wasting your time?"

"Ah, Dinah, we're in no rush, really. Let's take the scenic route. Better that you don't get tired out early on."

"Good," Dinah said with a nod. "Then let's take our time."

Malachi didn't mind this at all. It meant that he got to spend more time with Dinah. He was a bit nosy. He wanted to understand the relationship she had with Jan and he thought he'd start by knowing how Dinah ticked. She was only too glad to be showered with such attention and ate up all his questions. She was quite unabashed about herself and her life.

When they got to Papashan, Malachi was pretty disappointed at what they had to do, but Dinah was ever the charmer and left them in good graces with Papashan before his mouth ruined things. Dinah carried the Twilight Pretzels they'd have to deliver to the patrols to lift morale. She knew she was better suited to the task anyways. Along the way, they ran into plenty of unsavory creatures and practiced their fighting techniques on them. Seemed the desert really was a dangerous place, but nothing they couldn't handle. Malachi did get carried away a bit at the thought of the pain such creatures could potentially inflict on him. Had Dinah not dragged him away, he might still be there fighting the creatures.

"Geez, Malachi, what's your problem? You know we got to deliver these pretzels and it's already getting dark."

"Sorry," Malachi said with a bowed head, "I don't know what came over me."

Dinah shook her head. "Let's just focus on finding those patrols. And remember, no running."

They took heed to Papashan's directions as to where the patrols were and eventually, though they did get lost a few times and they did get entangled in a few random debacles with Qiqirin bandits, they got to them. There was one incident that stood out in Dinah's mind, Grishild the Ungood—at least that's what she told them her name was. If Dinah had her way, she would have avoided the woman altogether, but Malachi was itching for a fight and he went in head first.

"Malachi!" Dinah shouted as a warning.

But he hadn't been listening to her. He engaged in battle and there was little Dinah could do to stop him. It was clear as the battle wore on that her help was needed. Grishild seemed to have far more fortitude than Malachi who was already tiring out. He simply wasn't dealing enough damage and she was practically shrugging off all the hits he did manage to nab. Dinah only knew about two moves and she spammed the heck out of them. After she joined, others joined as well. She was especially grateful for the healer on hand for Malachi's sake. He might have been knocked out completely. Besides, Grishild seemed to be focused on Malachi even as Dinah dealt more and more damage along with a stray thaumaturge who let it rip on the fire blasts. Dinah thought they'd be there for hours fighting that crazy woman but eventually she backed off seeing as she was now outnumbered and on the verge of utter defeat. She might have had something to prove, but whatever it was she must have failed at it. Dinah thanked the healer for bringing Malachi back to full health, but afterwards he seemed to be in a sour mood for the rest of the day.

They delivered the pretzels and returned to Papashan who then told them it was probably too late to ask anything more of them and suggested they stay at the Black Brush Station nearby.

"Let's just go back to Ul'dah," Malachi said, "It's not that far away."

"But I'm so _tired_ and we'd be walking in the dark. It's dangerous at night."

"Dinah, you knew about the dangers before we even came out here what's a bit more for free lodging?"

Dinah shook her head at him. "I'm staying here. You can go back alone if you want," she said stubbornly. Then she turned and began towards the station.

"Wait, Dinah," Malachi had to run to catch back up to her. "I don't want to leave you alone. If you really want to stay, then I'll do it with you."

Dinah looked at him, "Really? I'm not forcing you to do anything."

"No, it's fine. You're probably right."

Malachi walked with her now to the Black Brush Station. The big bright aetheryte in the distance was hard to miss. They used it as their compass.

"Malachi, why did you run into that fight with that woman? We could have completely avoided all the trouble."

"And miss all the experience? I mean, how do you really expect to perfect your technique if not against real enemies?"

"Well, when you put it that way…"

"In fact, if there is ever a fight, I always want to be involved—it's the best and fastest way to hone my skills. I mean, Jan didn't get as powerful as he is waiting for fights to come to him."

Dinah nodded with understanding. "Guess I'll always be the weakest link."

"No, that's not what I mean—I wasn't trying to—

"No, no, I understand what you're saying. It's just…the only way hitting someone feels right is if there's no other alternative left."

"I think that's a perfectly good philosophy to live by."

Dinah turned and smiled at him.

"Has anyone ever told you how beautiful your smile is?"

"Oh, stop, Malachi," she said laughing.

"I'm being serious."

"Well," she said thoughtfully, "I do enjoy the occasional compliment."

"Occasional?" Malachi said clearly surprised. "One look at you and anyone would want to compliment you."

"Now, Malachi—

"I'm being serious."

"I can see that."

"Then stop deflecting. When I say something it's because I really mean it."

"Alright, Mr. Mean-it-when-I-say-it, anything else you want to say?"

They had made it to the Black Brush Station and stood just inside the gate. Malachi turned to her fully then with eyes that were suddenly piercing. "From the moment I first saw you, I thought you were the most beautiful woman I've ever laid eyes on. I admit that I'm glad to have the honor of traveling with you for these couple days."

She smiled lightly at the youth. "With lines like that, you'll have the ladies swooning," she said as she touched his chin. She moved in a little closer as if to kiss him. "It's too bad I'm already spoken for," she said pulling back and dashing his hopes for a kiss. Then she laughed. "You silly boy. Go find us a room before you put your foot in your mouth."

"You're spoken for alright," he said sourly. He had to forcefully stop himself from blurting out what he knew to be true about Jan. If only she knew, she'd dump that man in a second Malachi was sure.

"You know I hate it when you constantly ruin your handsome face with your sour looks," she said shaking her head. "I'm flattered, really I am, but you know who I'm dating—the fact that you even _considered_ doing anything with me is quite disappointing, but I'll forgive you. There's plenty of pretty girls out there—you just have to look. Now stop standing around and get that room."

Malachi's expression hadn't changed, but he turned to the nearby inn to look for a room. He was only all too glad to escape her presence. He was quite embarrassed. But then, he often spoke before he thought about what he was really saying. He needed to say it though. He couldn't imagine continuing on with her without her knowing how he felt about her even if she was dating someone else, even if he knew he would be rejected. He only wished Jan would be as open with his feelings.

/

Jasper had gone to bed early that day worrying how Dinah and Malachi were faring. He knew Malachi must have been over excited to learn that Jasper would not be accompanying him. Much as Jasper wanted to get on his last set of nerves, he didn't feel like doing the busy work of an adventurer besides, he'd already done it once in his life—he didn't plan on repeating it. He thought of Sarah and how invigorated she'd become after their sex. He'd do her again if he could find an excuse to, but he did have rules one of them being to never fuck the same woman twice. She was quite convenient though, and she wasn't particularly needy in the relationship department. She'd been there done that and probably didn't have the patience to do something so strenuous as a relationship over again. He bet she'd enjoy the friends with benefits arrangement, but Jasper had never once attempted this because there was far too much potential for things to go wrong. He knew his own feelings and whether he wanted to or not he would become emotionally attached to someone especially where sex was concerned. He was thinking of her wellbeing right now, in fact and he wanted to stay in her orbit to make sure that she was always alright and in good health. Friends with benefits wouldn't work, but the thought of sex at the moment felt incredibly enticing, but he had no convenient victim as of late.

That evening when he fell asleep, the same strange images came to him again and they remained undecipherable, but they were disturbing enough to wake him up prematurely. When he closed his eyes, he realized he couldn't sleep so he simply climbed out of bed again to see what Jan was up to. There was a chance that he might still be up.

He found Jan in the living room with a glass of what looked to be liquor in his hand. "Celebrating? What's the occasion?" But the other didn't respond as he downed the glass pretty quickly and then Jasper began to notice empty bottles on the floor. "Geez, did you raid all my cabinets? How much have you had?" Jasper tried to make good eye contact with the other, but he seemed to have trouble focusing on anything.

"Jasper?" he said finally, but Jasper heard the distinct slur in his voice.

"Are you alright?" Jasper asked stepping closer. "What's wrong? Why in the world are you—

"Jasper?" he asked again as if on repeat.

"Yes, I'm here," Jasper said moving in close enough to smell the alcohol on his breath. He bent down on his knees since the other was sitting down on the couch. He grew more and more concerned with Jan's health at the moment. His eyes traveled to the empty bottles and he began to silently count them—he was already up to twelve.

"Jasper…there's something I need to tell you…"

"Yeah, anything—you can tell me anything." The other was leaning forward now and Jasper had to press his hands against his shoulders to keep him up.

"I love you."

"What?" Jasper asked.

"I love you."

"Yeah, I love you too. Look, you need rest. You've drank far beyond your limit—

"No…I love, love you."

"What are you—

He stopped as Jan pulled him in closer and attempted to kiss him on the mouth. Jasper understood right then and there what he meant, but Jasper evaded the other's attempts quite easily.

"Jasper…what's wrong with me…what's…wrong with me…?"

"Jan…" Jasper was speechless for only a passing second, but his mind was already on the more pressing matter of Jan's deteriorating health.

He suddenly passed out and Jasper took hold of him immediately.

"What are you trying to do, kill yourself?" Jasper said in raised tones. He knew no one would hear so he was less concerned about the volume of his voice "Did you even look at the alcohol content before consumption? I only buy 100 proof or higher—Geez!"

Jasper's room was much closer so he dumped his unconscious friend on his bed and then began to heal him slowly, but there was little he could do for drunkenness. It was one of the few poisons that could only be healed with time.

"I hope you don't plan on making this a habit," he said pacing now back and forth in his room. "If there was something you wanted to say, then you should've just said it. Damn, I should've just forced you to do it before when you said you were hiding something from me."

But it was at that moment when it suddenly donned on him what it was Jan had hidden from him and he stopped pacing abruptly as his mind finally interpreted Jan's words. And then he felt embarrassed to be in the same room as Jan so he left it immediately, but he couldn't stay out for long on account of his constant worrying. He couldn't simply leave just because he was embarrassed or even slightly disgusted. He began to understand why Jan had not wanted to disclose such information to him, but it was disturbing. He wondered if their entire friendship was based upon a lie. The presents he had been given over the years suddenly had a different meaning. What kind of dirty thoughts must he have been having whenever he happened to undress in front of him? And that time with the erection when he was acting weird—had that been for him and _not_ Dinah?

He wanted to leave, but he stayed and watched the other intently. He could very well die right then and there—there was simply too much poison circulating in his system. And then a thought far more depressing than he'd ever had before came over him. Perhaps that had been his intention. Perhaps he _had_ wanted to die whether it be a conscious or subconscious decision. Then Jasper began pacing once again. What if he'd lost the will to live and he'd been the reason for it? He'd been too afraid to let him know—too afraid because he knew his reaction. He'd been willing to live in complete denial and it was all because of that fear. And it wasn't as if he'd been wrong. That was also depressing. He didn't want to be responsible for trapping someone in a corner. He didn't want to be responsible for someone else's death. It was his worst nightmare.

"Jan, I don't want you to die on my account," he said aloud. "Please—not for me."

He took a seat after nearly an hour of pacing and his eyes stared at the blinds to his window. He found he didn't have the energy to open them to look at a better image. His mind simply grew blank feeling more and more guilty for Jan's predicament. One couldn't control their emotions, Jasper knew that first hand. He resented the fact that he had made someone feel as if such things didn't matter, that anything else was better than admitting one's emotions. What kind of horrible person could do that to another? And that was his darkest nightmare. His eyes began to sting with tears and it took a while for them to actually come, his water ducts probably dry from disuse. They were hot and burning as they trailed down his face. He felt no need to wipe them; he simply let them come.

His only hope was that Jan didn't die and that if he didn't, he wouldn't then be resentful for living and not dying.

/

Jasper had fallen asleep watching the other. He'd forgotten how uncomfortable it was to sleep while in a sitting position—his neck ached for using his desk as a pillow. He turned to Jan and found that his position had changed. He'd somehow found his way under the comforters and covered himself completely with them.

"Jan?" Jasper asked and then he tapped what looked to be one of his shoulders.

There was movement under the covers and then a growling voice that said something that Jasper couldn't hear correctly.

"What did you say?" Jasper asked.

" .Alone."

"You know this is my room," Jasper informed the other.

"I have…no fucking idea where I am…"

"Do you remember what happened last night?"

"Whaz with the fucking 21 questions?"

"Then I suppose not. I don't suppose you know what you said to me."

"I told you…to turn off those damn lights."

"Huh?"

"Go _away_ already…"

"Sorry, I can't. I won't leave you to yourself until I know you're better."

"And you were supposed to…"

"Supposed to what?" But then it occurred to Jasper that Jan might not have been comprehending him at all the entire time especially when he heard his snores again.

With a sigh, Jasper sat back down. It was a start. Then he actually did exit the room but only to bring back a glass of water. Jasper expected the other to be pretty dehydrated. Jasper began pacing again and then sitting at his desk when his legs grew worn out. Jasper opened the blinds to let the light in—it wasn't something he did often. Hours passed before Jasper heard movement once again. He tried to peel back the covers to get a good look at him, but found that Jan didn't want that to happen as he had a firm grasp on it.

"What's the problem, Jan, I just want to look at you."

"…It's too damn bright…"

Jasper couldn't be sure if he was being answered or if the other was still in his own little world. "It's not," Jasper said back.

"It _is._"

"Do you know who I am?"

Jan didn't respond for so long that Jasper was afraid that he was once again not all there. "Is that a serious question?" Jan finally asked.

And then Jasper was overcome with joy and just as the other was trying to sit up, he grabbed Jan in an enthusiastic hug. "So you're not going to die."

But Jan was already trying to pull away from all the sudden activity and covering up his eyes from all the light. Jasper released him eventually when he realized the other wasn't quite so into it.

"Jan, what in the world did you think you were doing last night?"

"I don't know…I don't remember…" he grabbed the comforters once again and covered himself in it. "Shit…"

"Nothing at all? No memory of going into my liquor cabinets?"

"Sounds like…no it _feels_ like I did something really stupid…"

"Good deductive reasoning," Jasper said sharply.

"You wouldn't happen to have…some water."

"I might. But I have to take those covers off."

"Shit, man, it's too fucking bright!"

"Do you want some?"

When Jan didn't respond, Jasper walked over and yanked off the covers much to Jan's dismay who shrank away from the light and ducked his head under his arms.

"Here, drink up," Jasper said waiting for the other to look up which he eventually did with squinty eyes.

Not trusting Jan's hands, Jasper held the cup to his lips and slowly poured it. Then when he couldn't take anymore, Jasper retracted the cup. As soon as he did, Jan was back under the covers. Jasper could tell the other must have been in a lot of pain as he heard the string of curses under his breath.

"How are you feeling?" Jasper asked.

"Like hell."

"How about I close the blinds and then you won't have to suffocate yourself under the covers."

"Fine…"

Jasper quickly turned down the blinds and Jan reluctantly took off the covers. He laid back down as he held his head gingerly with tightly closed eyes.

"I just need to know something…You weren't trying to kill yourself last night, were you?" Jasper asked.

"I wouldn't know…I can't really…" But he left it at this.

"You would never try to kill yourself, would you?"

But Jasper was met with more silence.

"Jan, I'm talking to you."

"…I noticed."

"You told me something last night, something I think you've been hiding from me for a long time. The fact that…well, the fact that you…love me." Jasper was met with a deafening silence. "Jan, I know you heard me."

Jasper walked over and felt his forehead and it was quite warm and closer evaluation found that he must have passed out again.

"Convenient," Jasper said as he sat back down again. But he did feel a bit guilty wanting to have a full on conversation with someone who was clearly dealing with an intense hangover.

He'd have to get Jan to eat something before long so he went to the kitchen and heated up some leftover lentil soup—it was perhaps Jan's least favorite food in the entirety of the world, but Jasper didn't care. It was something to eat and he wasn't exactly feeling charitable. Jasper found that he was becoming increasingly annoyed with Jan for making him feel so guilty about himself. He poured a small amount in a bowl and took it back to his room. He could care less that by the time Jan was awake again, the soup was less than lukewarm.

"You need to eat," Jasper said upon his waking.

Jan took a moment to actually sit up and Jasper could tell that the light still bothered him. Jasper spoon-fed the other when he felt Jan was ready for it and he grimaced at the taste of it. Despite this, Jasper forced the other to take two more spoonfuls but it was impossible to get him to do anymore.

"What the hell…?" Jan asked after he refused anymore.

"Only your most favorite soup."

Jan gave the other an annoyed expression. He must have figured out what it was.

"Now, how do you feel?" Jasper asked.

Jasper's bed happened to be set against the wall so Jan moved back so that he could lean against it before he spoke. "Oh, I feel wonderful."

"This isn't a laughing matter, Jan. You could have died last night."

"Well…it wouldn't matter since you can just bring me back to life."

"That's not the point. I'd rather _not_ have to resort to such extreme measures. Would you mind telling me what you were trying to prove?"

Jasper waited for the other to respond, but Jan said nothing back. He only looked at him with the oddest expression on his face. Jasper didn't recognize it at all.

"Well, were you trying to kill yourself?"

"No," he said finally. "You don't have to feel guilty for anything that I did last night."

"So you do remember."

Jan was silent once again and Jasper realized that he was not used to this.

"Or you don't?" Jasper asked confused. He couldn't read the other's expression.

"I think I'll just…go to my room now," Jan said climbing out of the other's bed.

"What are you, ignoring me? You can't just—

But he stopped when he saw the other rush out of his room. Startled, Jasper attempted to follow him, but saw him enter the bathroom. He didn't have to come any closer to know that the other was vomiting and he stayed there for a while doing this. He was unsteady on his feet as he exited the bathroom and he had to use the wall for support, but then he went back into the bathroom and continued to barf until he had no more energy for it. Concerned when everything became quiet, Jasper went to check on Jan. He'd fallen asleep against the nearby bathtub. For a split second, Jasper thought about removing him from the bathroom, but thought better of it just in case he'd have need for a toilet again. Sensing that there was nothing more Jasper could do for him, he finally left Jan to himself. There was no way he could have a proper conversation with Jan in that condition and so he let the matter rest.

A couple hours passed before Jan woke up again and was woken by the pain in his stomach. It was the kind of pain that was worse than cramps and far worse than any punch to the guts. He hadn't eaten anything but he felt like vomiting. He found he was still in the bathroom so he bowed his head over the toilet once again, but nothing would come so he leaned back against the wall. He bent over as he was still subject to the nauseating pain. At the very least, he could think a littler clearer as his headache was finally subsiding, but at the same time he ached all over as if he'd just finished a particularly strenuous training session at the guild. He had no desire to move from the bathroom. When he felt like vomiting again, he moved to the toilet, but nothing came out. Perhaps he simply had nothing more to throw back up yet he still gagged as if he did. His heart was racing as if he was severely panicked about something and when he thought about what he had said last night, he probably had good reason to panic. In reality, were it not for his hangover, he'd feel relieved. He wasn't hiding anything anymore. Jasper knew everything now. Then he started gagging again much to his annoyance and, of course, nothing came up. He took a deep breath as he tried to calm his racing heart, but it did little to change his condition. He simply concentrated on the pain in the pit of his stomach since it bothered him the most. His mind was empty at the moment. Thinking seemed like a nuisance. He only wished that the nausea would pass and that Dinah wouldn't have to know what transpired last night. But that would be another secret. He didn't need any more of those. Dinah didn't deserve anymore of those. The thought of her depressed him beyond reason. He risked her breaking up with him and he just didn't want that to happen. But what could he do?

"You need to eat."

Jan looked up to the sound of Jasper's voice. That's all he had heard drifting in and out of lucidity. Always there with a question and he would become befuddled whenever he tried to think of how to answer.

"I don't want to. I'll just vomit it all back up again. Besides, I hate lentil soup."

"I know."

"Then—nevermind."

"It seems you're doing better."

"I suppose." His arm still pressed against his stomach firmly.

"Then I can finally say this: Don't you ever do something like this to yourself again or else I'll kill you myself."

Jan managed to grin at the other. "I doubt you'd be able to kill me yourself, but I get your point."

"You were saying last night?" Jasper asked.

"Yes, I was saying. I said it."

"And are there any other deep dark secrets you'd like to tell me?"

"Haven't you ever wondered what it was you were doing when you were possessed by Emily's mother?"

"No," Jasper said shaking his head. "I don't think I want to."

"We kissed on multiple occasions and you initiated it."

Jasper was taken aback by this and made completely speechless. "I did?"

"Yes."

"So it's my fault that you—

And then Jan shook his head. "No. I've always…from the time I introduced myself to you."

"For the last time, Jan, I'm _not_ a girl nor do I want to be."

"I think I figured that out long ago," Jan said sardonically. "But the thought was planted and I got to know you better. And then I began to wonder…," he said unable to finish. "Shit. I never wanted to feel like that towards you. Now that I've said it, it just seems so ridiculous now."

"Funny how things work out. Here." Jasper said as he stepped in and held out his hand to the other to help him up.

Jan took it and with great care climbed back to his feet.

"Secrecy can often be alluring and make things seem far more desirable."

"It does seem that way," Jan agreed.

"But there's only one way to find out where your true feelings lie."

"How?"

Jasper stepped closer to Jan until they were only a few millimeters apart. "Kiss me."

"But…I've just barfed up all your lentil soup and there's the morning breath."

"I don't care. Kiss me before I change my mind."

And then Jan went for it, but it wasn't how he imagined it would be. There was no magic there, no emotions and Jasper, of course, didn't react to anything he did. It just felt completely wrong and unfulfilling. Last time had been different somehow. Jasper was Jasper and now it was simply him kissing another man deciphering if there really was something there.

"Nothing?" Jasper asked when the other was finished.

"Nothing."

And Jasper grabbed the other's cock hard and fast to check for himself if anything had risen. Satisfied he finally stepped away from Jan.

"What the hell?" Jan exclaimed, "What is up with you and Dinah grabbing my balls like it's completely normal."

"You know I never do things like that, but the circumstances were pretty unique, don't you think? As for Dinah," he said turning away from the other, "Why don't you stop torturing yourself and fuck her already. Maybe she wouldn't have to grab your balls all the time and perhaps you wouldn't be so confused."

"Maybe I will."

"Since we're being so personal now, I probably couldn't go a year without sex before wanting to fuck anything that moved."

"You addict."

"Maybe I am."

"You made out with Malachi's mom for crying out loud and she's ancient."

Jasper shrugged, "She was vital enough."

"I'm surprised you haven't made any moves on Dinah."

"She's off limits. I'd never do that to you."

"At least you're an honorable addict."

"That's rich coming from an exploratory bisexual."

"And since we're throwing out labels, Malachi the masochist."

"And Dinah the…hmm…"

"Nymphomaniac."

"Did you just come up with that word?"

"Nope, it's a real word."

"You're pretty lucky, you know that?" Jasper said.

They'd finally exited the bathroom and Jan followed the other to the kitchen where Jasper then began to warm up the infamous lentil soup.

"How so?"

"If you're going to settle down with anyone let it be with someone crazy about you."

"Jasper, you're not going to tell her…what happened, are you?"

"Only if you don't want me to. But then I think it'd be a bad idea to mention anything to her. It's unnecessary."

"I can trust you easily, but…Malachi also knows."

Jasper frowned at the other. "Seriously? You told that crazy child? Do you even know what it means to be masochistic?"

"Yeah, I get the gist."

Jasper began stirring the soup. "He's not only a danger to himself but to those around him as well. I'd say he shows great restraint now, but it won't always be like that if he doesn't work on it. One of his pastimes is pissing people off and he already knows the perfect way to do that to you. He already knows how to get on my last set of nerves as well and I'm pretty sure he could easily get under Dinah's skin if he wanted to. My point being, there's a reason he doesn't have friends and it's not because he likes being alone—it's because he likes the emotional pain of loneliness."

"When you put it like that…I guess he was the _worst_ person to say anything to."

"I hope you've learned your lesson. You can tell me anything—anything at all even if I might not like what you have to say."

"I have learned my lesson."

"I suppose on the flipside, at least we have a crazy tank on hand—those kind of people are hard to find."

"So are you," Jan said thoughtfully. "But I'm just any old person who knows how to throw a few punches."

"You're not any old person. I don't know if you noticed, but I don't get along with very many people. The fact that you haven't run away from me screaming in horror counts for something."

Jan grinned at this. "You know I may just be starving enough to scarf down that disgusting soup of yours."

"That's good to hear. It's rich in all the nutrients you'd need to recover from a hangover."

"Next you'll be serving me that grass tea."

"I wouldn't do that to you. Besides, orange juice isn't such a bad choice in this situation."

Jasper was already taking two bowls from the cabinets and filling them with the strange concoction that is lentil soup—one bowl had a great deal more in it than the other and that one was for Jasper himself. When it came to lentil, Jasper sometimes overindulged in it thus the oddly large pot he had made the soup in even though no one else in the house even liked it. Jan grabbed a glass of orange juice and joined his friend out in the dining room table.

"I wonder how Dinah and Malachi are faring out there," Jan said after swallowing a dreadful spoonful of soup.

"I like to hope for the best. They seem capable enough."

"I mean, they're only tactic working together would be to completely overwhelm any enemy they face."

"But you forget they don't live in a vacuum. There could very well be others that might help them."

"Perhaps those others should be us."

"Perhaps, but they haven't really asked for our help so we'll just have to trust their judgment."

Instead of slowly eating and tasting every single excruciating bite of the soup, Jan decided he'd down it really quickly and wash away any lingering taste with orange juice which is what he wind up doing much to Jasper's amusement.

"I think I'll return to my room," Jan said when he was finished.

"Can you make it there without tripping over yourself?"

"Very funny. I'll be fine."

"And will you keep all your food down?"

"I'll do my best."

Just then, Jan heard as the front door opened—it was obvious that Dinah had used her key to get in so he made his way there along with Jasper to welcome them back. But as soon as they got to the front of the house, it wasn't what they expected. Jan, from the moment he saw the expression on Malachi's face sensed that something was amiss. He didn't, however, predict his rapid approach and the concurrent sharp jab to the guts.

"Malachi!" Dinah said in surprise, "You didn't have to—

Everything happened at once. Before Dinah could even finish her sentence, Jan was emptying all his contents on to Malachi. The youth was so shocked that he could do little more than stand there and let the regurgitated food slide down his clothes. But it was he who broke the shocked silence first.

"What the _hell_, Jan?!" Malachi shouted in genuine disgust.

"I'm _so_ sorry, man—I just—

"Where's the nearest shower?" Malachi said cutting across the other.

"Past the living room, down the hall and your first left," Jasper said without skipping a beat.

Malachi was too disgusted to even begin to say what was on his mind and rushed from the room with never another word. Jan turned and watched him go completely and utterly embarrassed. There was silence for a few passing seconds before Jasper snickered unable to hide his amusement, but then Dinah started laughing as well and then they were both laughing outright. Jan could only grin at their amusement—he still felt bad about the entire thing and besides, his stomach felt not only caved in but twisted around itself. He thought he might find someplace to sit before collapsing from the debilitating pain.

"Ah…yeah, I think I'll take a seat somewhere," Jan said

Living room being the closest place, he made his way there and the other two followed in suit. He rested his head on the armrest and stared almost absently at the spinning world around him. If there was anything to feel good about it was that Malachi had an excellent right jab…

The two was still laughing as they sat down. Dinah sat next to Jan and Jasper as usual took his own couch. He felt her hand rubbing his back.

"I'm glad you two can laugh at someone else's misery," Jan said.

"Oh, come," Jasper began, "That was his just desert. Punching someone is no way to greet another after being away so long."

"He was just being rude as usual," Dinah finally said, "But he had reason to." She suddenly stopped rubbing the other's back. "I guess I'll just start by asking: what in the world happened to you while we were gone?" Dinah said with clear concern in her tone.

"Well, he's working through an impressive hangover," Jasper said when he noticed Jan's dizziness at the moment.

"A _hangover_. Jan, that's very unlike you. You said you were a social drinker," Dinah said speaking to Jan.

"Something came up and besides, it all happened here," Jasper said attempting to answer Dinah who only glanced at him.

"Jan? I'm talking to you—do you need your _boyfriend_ to answer everything for you?"

That got a rise out of Jan even if he was slightly out of it. "He's _not_ my boyfriend," Jan said immediately. "And to answer your question…Well, I was feeling overwhelmed…depressed…about the thought of losing you…"

"Oh why don't we just cut to the chase? Why in the world would you even begin to think that way unless you knew you were doing something wrong? Malachi told me—you're harboring feelings towards Jasper of all people. Is that true?" Dinah demanded.

"_Was_ true."

"Oh and that's supposed to make it any better? You were lying to me for weeks, Jan. I mean, who knows how long?" Then Dinah turned to Jasper. "And you don't seem very surprised at all by this."

"I only found out yesterday in his drunken stupor."

"And?" Dinah asked.

"And what?"

"And do you like him?"

"Only as a friend, Dinah. It has always been that way for me."

"I see. Jan—

"I'm sorry," Jan said dejectedly. "I'm sorry for everything. I didn't mean to hurt you."

Then she went back to rubbing his back. "Is this all part of your diabolical plan to make me feel sorry for you instead of mad at the fact that you've been emotionally cheating on me from the very beginning?"

"Dinah…"

"No, I don't really want to hear anything more from you. Right now, I don't want you anywhere near me." She stood up then. "And don't bother coming to the room—I think it better you stay on the couch." Then she promptly left.

"You couldn't make it up there if you tried," Jasper said thoughtfully.

"…Doesn't matter…" Jan responded sluggishly. If he wanted to say something else, he couldn't as he fell asleep in mid-thought.

"Look at this way," Jasper said knowing he was only speaking to himself, "At least she hasn't broken up with you."

/

Malachi, Jasper, and Dinah sat down together for breakfast the next day. Jasper had gotten up a little earlier than usual to make a large breakfast in light of their long travels

"Where's Jan?" Malachi asked as they began on their food.

"Still recovering I'm afraid," Jasper said as he took a scoop of what looked to be just hot water.

Dinah's eyes seemed to be glued to her plate as they spoke of him.

"But what about you guys? I'd love to hear how your travels have gone," Jasper said lightening the mood.

"Long and arduous," Dinah said finally speaking up. "We even made a little money on the side."

"Ah, yes, able-bodied adventurers are never short of work," Jasper responded.

"Tell him about Queen Lilira," Dinah said to Malachi.

"Oh yeah," Malachi began, "Apparently she went to the Sultantree by herself without any escorts and no one knew where she was. It was just our luck that we came upon her at that tree. Just when we got there, these voidsent came out of nowhere and Dinah and I along with some weird white haired guy had to fight them."

"Weird white haired guy?" Dinah repeated, "He was quite handsome, I might add, and if it wasn't for him, we may not have made it back here in one piece."

"Alright, so he helped us a little. In the end, we saved that girl woman and we got paid very lavishly for our efforts since she happened to be of royalty. Bought us some better armor—

"Wait a minute, aren't you missing the part about the crystal you found?"

"I _don't_ want to talk about the crystal."

"But I was so worried when you collapsed after picking it up."

"It's over now," Malachi said.

"You collapsed from picking up a crystal?" Jasper asked intrigued. "What kind of crystal, child?"

"I'm not a child," Malachi said stubbornly, but he did take the crystal out of his pocket and held it out with his hand.

Jasper peered at it closely. "May I hold it?"

"No," Malachi said closing his hand around it.

Jasper gave him an annoyed looked as he watched the other put said stone away. "I would be worried about objects that can alter your consciousness at will."

"Of course you'd be worried—that's all you're good for, isn't it?"

"Malachi, he was just concerned for you. Can't anyone be a little worried about your welfare without you turning into a complete dick?" Dinah said.

Malachi glared at her, but then turned his eyes back to his plate. "Sorry."

"Now that's what I like to hear," Dinah said with a smile.

"Sounds like you two have luck on your side, I'm glad."

"It's not just luck—it's skill," Malachi declared, "And Dinah has gotten a lot more proficient in fighting."

"Thank you," she said.

"That's nice. Just don't get carried away," Jasper said.

"Listen to this man, always doubting us at every turn," Malachi replied.

"Should I encourage you two to take more chances? That wouldn't be in my nature. I think it's time that Jan and I accompany you, next time you two go out."

"I won't let that man accompany me anywhere," Dinah said darkly. "If you want to come that's fine."

Jasper set his spoon down and looked at Dinah directly, "I find it hard to believe that it doesn't hurt you to spend so much time away from Jan. Now obviously you two have much to discuss. Don't let anger be your only guide."

"I've already told him all that I wanted," Dinah declared.

"Have you?" Jasper asked. "Was that really how you wanted to leave things?"

Malachi grinned, "Listen to you—always trying to protect your boyfriend's feelings."

"I'm only doing what any friend would do for another, but I wouldn't expect you to know such things, Malachi. You're expert in getting rid of those who care for you, but you're less than a novice when it comes to keeping them."

Malachi frowned at the other but said nothing more.

"I just need some time…and space," Dinah said. "You think it's okay what he's done? You don't think he deserves punishment? Do you think he even deserves _me_?" Dinah said to Jasper with challenging eyes.

"Jan can punish himself just fine on his own without you having to lift a finger," Jasper said nearly snapping back at her. "And, no, it's not okay what he's done, but if you entered a relationship without expecting there to be bumps along the road, then you're far more naïve than you make yourself out to be."

"I'm _naïve?_ Are those the words you choose to describe me?"

"You wanted my thoughts on the matter."

"You know what?" Dinah said standing. "You two are perfect for each other. You'll forgive him anything, wouldn't you? Even the fact that your friendship with him has been a lie. And he'll put up with your insufferable attitude, the one where you think you're better than everyone else." Dinah hadn't even finished with her food, but she was done eating. "I'm going out. I need some fresh air."

Dinah left and Jasper did not follow. Malachi continued on his food—he might have left after her had he not been so famished.

"Why don't you go ahead and say it," Malachi said as the silence between them became more and more uncomfortable. "You hate me."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you? I don't hate you. I think it's a good thing this has finally come out. Jan has always been terrible with secrets and it was eating him up inside. Though it doesn't seem like it now. You may have done more good than harm."

Malachi was caught off guard by this and his ears became red with sudden bashfulness. "Really?"

"But I'm sure it was all unintentional on your part, wasn't it?"

Then Malachi stabbed a fork at the last sausage on his plate. "Maybe."

"As soon as Jan told me he disclosed this kind of information to you, I knew this would happen sooner or later. Must you always push people away, Malachi?"

"This coming from a guy who hardly has any friends to speak of?"

"Unlike you, it isn't intentional. I try to be as accommodating as I can, but people tend to steer clear of me."

"Maybe if you didn't act so uppity all the time."

"Uppity?"

"High and mighty?"

Jasper gave the other a confused expression.

"Weren't you listening to Dinah just then—like you're better than everyone."

"But I don't think that so the notion that I _act_ like that is invalid. I'm not an actor, Malachi. If I don't believe I'm better than anyone else, then I certainly don't go out of my way to act like that."

"See what I mean? You have an explanation for _everything_."

"How did we suddenly start talking about me? It's _you_ we should be concerned with. At some point while you were enjoying yourself, having a good time with Dinah, you decided it'd be the perfect time to upset her and ruin a budding relationship."

"I wasn't try to upset her per se. I was trying to get her to see the error of her ways."

"Error?"

"For liking Jan. She's too good for him."

"And you're suddenly the end all judge about who's too good for who? What gives you the right to decide who someone should like? Speaking of acting like you know everything—

"Oh don't start with that. Would you allow Dinah to keep living in a lie if you knew the truth?"

"I would have made the decision not to get between someone else's relationship. She shouldn't have to hear the truth from you—she should hear it from the one who is responsible. It was not your place to say anything. Jan trusted you with a secret and you broke that trust. The best thing you could have done was try to convince Jan to reconsider."

"I _did_ on plenty of occasions, but he was too hardheaded to listen."

"Oh, but he would have broken his vow of silence—just apply a little pressure. I guarantee you, Jan would have told her everything at some point and probably soon."

"I don't know him that well. I had to do what was right."

"You weren't trying to do what was right—we both know that. Do you like watching others in pain?"

Malachi glared at the other. "No it wasn't like that."

"Then why, Malachi? Why did you have to open your big mouth?"

"Because…Because I like her, okay."

"Wait, like, like her?"

"Yes. And I thought: why should she be with a guy who can't really appreciate her like I do?"

"And why did you assume that you can appreciate her better than Jan?"

"Because I'm not _gay_ like he is."

"I can't believe you just said that," Jasper said shocked.

"Well it's true. The sooner Dinah realizes this, the sooner—

"The sooner what? She'd go for some kid who's too young to even buy her a good drink? You've made a lot of assumptions, Malachi. I suggest you become more diligent in your fact-finding before you start spouting out nonsense." Jasper put the bowl he was eating out of to his lips and drank the rest of its contents.

"Sometimes you just have to follow your gut intuition."

"You're too young to have developed such a thing. You still can't see the forest through the trees," Jasper stood up as well and left the kitchen.

Malachi was left alone and he finished the rest of his breakfast in silent thought. Then he went to go look for Jan. He found him soon enough in the living room still utterly asleep. Malachi was unconcerned with this. He shook the other to wakefulness without mercy. He appeared groggy, but lucid enough so Malachi took a seat on the couch in front of the other.

"What time is it?" Jan complained to the other.

"Late enough for any sane person to have woken up already," Malachi said sharply.

Jan sighed heavily, "What do you want, kid?"

"I just want you to know that I had no choice, you pushed my hand."

"In what way?" Jan asked confused. "I didn't force you to say anything."

"You did, by your stubborn silence."

"That was my choice to make."

"It was a terrible one."

"No, my mistake was letting you know anything in the first place."

"Maybe not. Dinah can finally be free from you. You can stop filling her head with lies."

Jan looked away when he said this.

"I just want you to know that Dinah _will_ leave you. What you did was unforgivable," Malachi said confidently.

"I know," he muttered.

"What was that? I couldn't hear you."

"I said: I know," Jan said louder. And then he laid his head back on the armrest. "Having a hangover is a lot easier than having a clear head and the ability to think on what you've done, fully understand the ramifications of your actions."

"So you were trying to run away from your problems. Sounds about right." Malachi watched as Jan's eyes grew very blank as if he had stopped thinking altogether. "Uhh…Jan?"

"Was there anything else you wanted to remind me of?" he said forlornly. "I'd rather just be left alone."

"She's always deserved better than you. A person who can betray someone else's feelings like you have doesn't deserve anyone."

Jan's eyebrows creased as the other spoke and then he sat back up to look at the other properly. "Could you be any less subtle about your disgust of me? I get it, you've made your point. Is that all you have to say?"

"Yes, I suppose."

"Is that really all? To think, there's really someone out there who will waste time out of their life to belittle an already broken man; it's depressing all on its own. I pity the woman who would have to deal with the likes of you."

"You can talk. You've already—

"Yes, I know what I did, Malachi," Jan said drearily.

Then Malachi's eyes softened a little. "Sometimes…well, sometimes I get carried away…"

"That's just what you do with little regard to anyone besides yourself."

"I know what you think of me that I'm some troubled, rude, unappreciative youth who'll never learn how to be anything else besides what I am."

"Oh don't flatter yourself," Jan said bitterly, "You're something much simpler than that."

"And what's that?" Malachi asked.

"An asshole. I think you've done enough here—just leave me in peace and I'll wallow in my misery."

"Fine," Malachi said looking away blinking back tears. "If you think I'm such an asshole, you won't ever have to hear from me again."

Malachi practically raced out of the room in order to hide his tears. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt the need to cry. Pain had always been a good thing. People hating him was an achievement; it always made his day. But he couldn't understand his reaction now. He wiped away the wetness from his face, but the tears continued to fall. The tightness in his chest had not been there before when other people had said worse things to him.

"Shit…what's _wrong_ with me?" Malachi asked aloud to himself genuinely concerned.

He couldn't understand this kind of despondency. He didn't feel at all like himself and he just wanted all the strange things he was feeling right then to go away.

/

AN: Some adventuring…and a lot of drama. Stay tuned!


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